My boyfriend is getting married..what to do?

I never thought I would be in this situation, so I was wondering what other people would do if this happened to them (I hope it never would)

OK, so I've been in a relationship with my boyfriend for about a year now, he's Jordanian. I lived with him a few months there, we fell in love and when I returned home we carried on in a long distance relationship. It was pretty serious, he'd talk about living with me in the future and marriage even. His father once mentioned to him about getting married to a girl in the village - its quite a traditional place- and he got really angry and refused as he didn't want to marry some girl he didn't know.

Anyway, now he's told me that there's been more pressure on him from his family to get married to this girl, and basically he gave in. He still loves me, but he's been trying not to, if ya know what I mean. he's been trying to forget me because he has to now, he's getting married.

At first when I heard, I tried to accept it. It was really painful, I actually feel physically sick when I imagine him living with a girl he doesn't know and raising a I'm thinking maybe I could do would be quite a slim chance but..

I'm just wondering what you would do, if you both love each other but this happens. Would you just accept it and move on, or would you fight it?


Most Helpful Girl

  • I would be thinking if this guy loves me so much,and his feelings are this real,why can't he stand up to his family?

    Think about it-The man who loves you is marrying another woman because of pressure from his family.Nah,thats not right.

    He shoulda been a man and stood his ground,his feelings for you should of made him outraged at being pressured to marry someone else.

    I would want a man who would move mountains to be with me and one with more balls,im afraid,so id say move on.

    • In this case it's more than "fighting his family" It would be "fighting Jordan society".

    • Yes,but he doesn't have to stay there...he could of up and left to be with her,stranger things have happened for love? And it would probly be the only way round it then.

      I don't know I still think she's backing a lame horse either way she should move on.

    • Hmm I think you're right. if he loved me that much he wouldn't go ahead with it.thanks

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 3

  • Do you have a REAL choice other than to move on? In countries like Jordan, a marriage is a transaction between families. (as it was in Europe 100 years ago) You can't fight Jordan.

    By now he knows the girl (and ANY girl has her own qualities) Chances are he appreciates her now (and he appreciates the marriage) and ends up being a good husband and father.

    I would HATE an 'arranged marriage', but ,let's face it, spontaneous marriages have a 50% failure rate.

    IDK the failure rate of arranged marriages.

  • What's missing here is a bit of courage on his part. If he can't cut the apron strings for the woman he loves, best to let him go. You want a man who'll fight for you.

  • Is this 2009 or am I forgetting where I'm at? Traditional marriages are very rare these days, only in other countries outside the US are they still custom.

    Seems he needs to be the apple that falls VERY far from the tree. If he's not willing to stand up to his family, then it means he's not willing to stand up for you and him.


What Girls Said 1

  • Accept it and move on to someone who can love you freely and really! I don't believe any man can be forced to marry- he is not being honest with you. What he wants is his cake & eat it too... If a man loves you he will only marry you not another!

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