I don't want my friend to get married.. what should I do?

I've been pondering about this for a while. One of my good friends has been with this guy for less than a year. To sum things up their relationship started with deceit. The guy she's now engaged to was friends with her ex boyfriend AND her now fiance's ex girlfriend was her friend too.
My reason for not wanting her to get married is because it's happening super fast (which I have spoken to her about) and how their relationship began.
I hope it's not confusing but in April of last year before they got together my friend's fiance was still with his girlfriend but he was messing around with her (my friend) They were talking, texting, and hanging out and I expressed to her that what she's doing is not right. By that time she'd broken up with her before and by summer she was with this guy and two months later they're engaged. She once mentioned to me that he was checking for her even when he was in a relationship. I question that. I feel like this can happen to her too. I just worry that she's rushing into something that may destroy her life. How should I approach this?


Most Helpful Guy

  • If it is a mistake, the only thing to make her learn is for her to experience it, you can't make someone change their mind, and trying to will only cause problems with your friendship. If you end up stopping it, she may blame you for what could have been, ruining a friendship


Most Helpful Girl

  • Hmm this is a hard one i understand ur frustration, but she is already engaged. What i would do if i strongly had a bad feeling about the guy is to tell her how i feel. I would start like this: babygirl :) i love u n i want nothing more than your happyness just i think u rushing it. Would you consider postponing ur wedding. I just wanna make sure i did what i could if he ever hurted you. Am not asking you not to marry just to move ur wedding a little ahead. If you would do this for me I WILL throw u a party or pay for hotel n dinner ur choice :) for your first year anniversary. What u think friend? Now this only gives u n her a little more time, to see if this guy does anything stupid. If she accepts ask for 6 months if you think u can get away with 8 months go for it. Also try to come up with reason why she will be postponing the wedding.

    • Thankfully the wedding has been pushed back but by the guy. I did express my concerns and she reassured me that yes she was aware of the cheating, and he didn't treat the other girl right but she believes that it's different for her (although I'm not convinced). However, I find it concerning that she's okay with the things he did before getting with her.. like him cheating to get with her and stuff. It's almost like she's proud of what he did to get her.
      When she changed the date of her wedding you would think that's something you'd immediately tell your bridesmaids. But she waited told us a month after she and her fiance had decided to push back the date.

    • Sometimes people create a little ego when ur girl or guy leaves thecone their with to be with them but that means you have no respect for others. I mean treat others how u wanna be treated. But all we can do is advice them n wish them well.

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What Guys Said 0

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What Girls Said 1

  • Don't interfere just be her shoulder to lean on

    • Honestly that's how I've been playing it. But at the same time I feel bad about it... I just don't want my friend to end up divorced or in a bad relationship.