My husband is always bringing out negative things about my body. What should I say to him?

I hate my body too but it makes me feel worse when he mentions something. I want to tell him it hurts which I've done before but he always gets upset or feels like I'm being negative by only mentioning bad things he says. He'll make a joke out of it but it always hurts. Thanks in advance.


Most Helpful Guy

  • You definitely want to let him know that it hurts. That you're not trying to be rude, but it makes you even more self conscious instead of helping you overcome your dislike of your own body.

    If he doesn't get it, make the comparison of how hurtful it would be if you made fun of his member size or his prowess in bed. It would get to him just like his comments are getting to you even if it's a joke.

    If you're already on your way to a healthier you, then great, that's awesome, keep it up. Ask him for encouragement so it motivates you to keep going. If you're not, suggest working out and eating healthier together. It might even bring you closer.

    With no disrespect to the ladies but guys eventually do get sick of hearing about their SO complaining about their body and never willing to do anything about it. A lot of women just have that notion that "my man should love me no matter how I look". That's certainly true, but it doesn't mean he can't be frustrated always trying to boost your self-esteem with no result. Let's be honest, when you don't feel beautiful and a guy says you are, you just think he's lying. So we can't really win.

    A side note about a personal experience. A past gf kept gaining weight and she started feeling insecure. She kept wanting me to tell her how beautiful she looked. The unfortunate part for me was that her mother was a very large women with all the issues that come with obesity. Low self-esteem, medical problems, never wanting to go out, etc... I didn't want my gf to turn out like that. Despite the gain, my gf never stopped being beautiful in my eyes, but it's hard to keep telling someone they're beautiful because you feel like you're encouraging obesity. At some point, you want them to be able to turn it around before they reach a point where they give up. Women take it personally and feel unattractive but the reality is we love you and care about your health, not just how you look.

    • Best answer! Thanks. I really want to get healthy. No more complaining! & I'll fake it till I make it. But when I make it, he's gonna eat his heart out lol

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 2

  • Say you don't like his joke and you are seriously hurt by his comment. Communication is key. Mens are not mind reader.

  • Kick him the balls and ask him if it hurts. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)


What Girls Said 3

  • Ask him if he feels like it's negative to always be negative about your body. He can't stand to *hear* about the things he says to you but he feels that he can *say* those things TO you ABOUT you?

    That's messed up. He needs to stop taking his body issues out on you because you deserve way better from your life AND the person who's supposed to share it with you.

    • lol at your gif! Great answer too thanks!

    • NW! I hope you're able to get to a point where he respects you more.

  • Next time you are about to have sex get him all worked up and turned on. Then stop and say "You probably don't want to have sex with someone with a body like mine" then go to sleep.

  • Tell him it hurts you and ask him to stop. You need to be frank. And if he ignores your complaints, tell him to go fuck himself.