Guys & gals: Can I get my husband back? I know he still loves me but he's afraid of what people will say! He's unhappy, please help?

My husband and I have been separated for about a year and we both started dating other people, even moved in with them. But now I know neither of us are happy. What can I do to try to get him back? I'm fairly certain he'd take me back in a heartbeat, he is scared of what his mother would say, because she's that way but now I have reason to believe that she likes me better than his current girlfriend, and even his Dad said he liked me but told my husband to run from this current girlfriend when they first met her.. they've only been together for 6 months which might be a long time to some but we are almost 30, and I've been with my husband for 6 YEARS so....

Anyways please if anyone has been through something similar or if you were put into his situation, would you take me back and work on our marriage?


Most Helpful Guy

  • If i were in ur shoes.
    I would remember all the things y we divorced, and did divorce solve the problems and make our lives better?
    And i would really imagine and simulate in my mind how things would then our if we start living back again.
    And also if ur feeling this way did u think if he is on the same page? What if he doesn't feel the way u are.
    Do u think the problems before , which got u divorced won't repeat this time or are you convinced it won't bother you again!
    If u feel positive of all the things above then why stop ur heart.

    • We didn't actually divorce but you are right, and coming from a males point of view this made me feel much more confident! Thank you for your comment! I ran from our problems instead of addressing them and we worked through problems in the past so I believe in my heart we could do it again. I can see he's terribly unhappy with her, and so can both of our familes. I feel this is the right thing to do, and yes I shall follow my heart :-) Thanks again!

    • Your welcome! Normally we get closer after solving a fight and relationship gets more stronger but in ur case you split up , anyhow its not late, so great go ahead, but I would like you to be cautious for that percentage of chance if he doesn't feel the same way.
      Hope u get the things right and May you never split up liek that again, Do let us know how thigns turn out ;-)
      God bless , and never let go off him again. just solve.

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • If you con both accept your faults and amend the things that you both did wrong, and basically not repeat whatever , made you divorce go for it!

    Try reaching out to him, let him no you still care about him, and hope he is happy

    • Thanks for your advice!! I did reach out to him but honestly he's too afraid of his family so he turned me down but that's ok as I have now moved on, I wish him all the best. Thanks again and I'm sorry I just saw your comment

What Girls Said 2

  • First of all, you stop dating and move out if you are completely serious about trying to get back with your husband. Give your self a little time to get over that relationship before trying to fix things with your husband. You can't say that you are committed to making the marriage work if you are emotionally invested in someone else.

    Second, you need to address the issues that caused you to separate in the first place. You can't just decide you want him again and expect everything to be okay. He is a human being with feelings, not an object to be picked up and put down whenever you please. Couples counseling could help you guys open up about troubles you two had.

    • You are completely right and I swear I'm not one of those types that toys with people's emotions, what you said makes sense and I agree! Thanks so much for your comment, I am 100% certain that I made a mistake by leaving and since we never got divorced and other things have made me realize we are meant to be together. Thanks again!! I feel much better and more confident now :-)

  • I think the time you had apart from each other made you guys more closer then ever now you both have had the time to think and appreciate each other a lot more now that you guys had time to think and appreciate the little and big things that came out of being married to each other do what makes you guys both happy try a different approach and in showing interest that you can care for him not matter what you are and i think starting up a friendship again and turning it into a relationship is the way to go show him that you have change from the past and have gotten into a better place by taking in his opinion when making a decision by doing the things you guys talked about doing before by trying new things will give you more to talk about and will get him to be open about things he wasn't before he will come back if you stay confident in what you already knew you already had with him

    • I agree to everything you just said! Thank you!! This made my day, I've been doing a LOT of thinking on this and I think if I play my cards right, he will understand and we can work this out :-) We have done a lot together and we know each other.. its just at the time I really thought I was doing the right thing, I thought he wasn't happy. But he told me after the fact that he was. We've been separated for a year this month. I'm set up to see him Thursday so I hope this works out. Thanks again for all of you guys helping me!!!