Invited to a wedding I don't want to go to. Help?

Hey All!

I was invited out last weekend to have dinner with 2 really close friends of mine who are a couple. They announced that they are engaged. I congratulated them and then the ultimate question happened. They invited me to the wedding.

Now I have made my position very clear in the past that I'm very much apposed to weddings and marriages and they know that. I have dodged 3 previous weddings because of this. I'm astounded that they asked me and I have a gut feeling their going to ask me to play a role in this wedding.

Has anyone had this situation happen to them? Is their anyway to let the know I don't want to be apart of this?

Ok people reading into this too much! they a really good friends since childhood.

They know my stance on marrage.

I will be more than happy to meet up with them soon.

But to step foot into a church no way.

I am asking is their away of letting them know I care but no thank you?


Most Helpful Girl

  • You can show your support for something you disagree with.

    I think you should go !

    However , if you feel that strongly you should tell them the truth.
    Don't lie though !
    If they are smart enough they will see past the bullshit especially since they know where you stand on the topic of marriage.

    • Thanks I am messaging them now and hope they really understand. I an hoping they take it well. I am still gob smacked they asked me tho but it's just a waiting game now !


    • No problem :)

Most Helpful Guy

  • I'm rather confused.

    Is this a gay wedding or something? Is that why you don't agree with it?

    There's nothing wrong with that opinion; just wondering.

    • No not a gay wedding I'm not homophobic. The principal of marrage I'm against.

    • So your only opposed to hererosexual weddings?

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 7

  • If you're close with them, it's really rude of you not to go. This is a situation where you have to ask yourself whether you value their friendship or your personal beliefs more.

    • Well I would go but very hesitant to go. But u do have a feeling there is more to this! I value my friendship but I would like them to value my beliefs

    • I think in this case, however, you'd just be being selfish by not going. Their wedding isn't about you. It's about them celebrating their love and looking to start a life together.

  • This is exactly what RSVPs are for. Even though they know about your aversion to marriage, they probably didn't want you to feel left out, just in case, and still wanted to include you since they are good friends. It's still totally up to you to decline the invitation if that's what you want to do. Since they already know about your feelings on marriage then it shouldn't come as much of a surprise. Just let them know there's no hard feelings, you just don't feel comfortable with weddings.

  • Make up an excuse.

    • What do you suggest and remember they know me very well

    • Um I'm not good at making excuses. Tell them you have to go to work and you can't come to their wedding.

  • If you don't want to participate in the wedding, tell them you no longer want to be friends with them.

  • They are your friends, and it's importaint for them that you are there. Try not to be so selfish and do a nice thing for you friends. It won't kill you.

    p. s. Hate weddings myself, but was pretending to have lots of fun for a friend of mine. And had some really good food. ;)

    • As I said to another commenter I don't think I'm being selfish because it's them who are asking to go against my beliefs I'm looking for the best way to say to them no thank you before this escalates

    • Show All
    • Oh I have stepped out on many a limb for them !

    • Then I'm sure you could do so on the day they probably consider the most importaint for them.

  • They probably only invited you to be nice so you don't come back and say you were offended they didn't invite you.

    • They know me too well for me not to be offended

    • Well two of my friends ended their friendship years ago and don't want to be in the same vicinity as one another but I still invite both to my parties. Only one goes but it's the thought that counts.

  • Then don't go and if you want to spare their feelings, then come up with a good exuse.


What Guys Said 0

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