He married me, does he still love his crush?

I met this good guy on a public event, and he had a crush on another girl in the same event, the girl is beyond gorgeous and is a good person (from what I know about her) we started talking later after the event and we became friends (me and the guy), and I tried to help him get the girl, needless to say, we fell in love shortly and became an item. 2 months later, we had a fight and he said he doesn't know if he loved me or her. That fight has passed, we broke up, then we got back together. 2 years later we got married. I found out that he still stalks her a lot on social media. I can not let this go. Does he still love her? Why is he doing this? And how can I make him quit? He told me he doesn't love her anymore but I have a feel he does. Please help.


Most Helpful Guy

  • He might have had a feeling

    • But he chose you, so try not to make yourself crazy about it.

    • Sit him down and really tell him how you feel. As your husband he should respect you by not talking to her.

    • Thank you, that helped :)

Most Helpful Girl

  • I feel your pain. My fiance's ex tried to contact him when she found out we were first dating. I was so pissed, and paranoid and jealous. It took me months to get rid of my insecurities about her. But he did choose you, he's married to you. And if you start noticing weird behavior like him talking to her, or sneaking out and coming home late or just shady stuff in general, then I'd be really concerned. I think he's just curious about her but it's nothing to worry about. If he was doing it every day or a few times a week, then maybe that would be concerning too and you can just tell him and you'd have to be really honest with him. He might get mad that you noticed but it's for your benefit, and you have a right to know if he's being shady like that.


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What Guys Said 0

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What Girls Said 1

  • He may still want to be with her, but she doesn't want to be with him, so he settled & married you because you were ok & he doesn't want to be alone.

    Or, some people just like to keep tabs on their exes. It's not that they want to get back with them, just nosy.

    Or, he is keeping tabs on her waiting for his chance to try again with her.

    Who knows, that's all a part of being married, yes you both said vows but at the end of the day everyone has their own mind & can selfishly change it without any remorse.

    Talk to him about it & then leave it alone. Don't nag him, you'll trust drive him away. Once you have his final answer, trust him to remain truthful to you.

    • Thank you for your answer.
      I find it very hard to let this one go. It has been almost 3 years with this and it's pretty unsettling.
      What bothers me he is friends with her on facebook.
      How can I let this go? How can I trust him like this?

    • Sorry I can't answer this one for you, its quite a pickle, but you're married so you're going to have to talk to him. He should listen to your concerns & respect your wishes.