About 2 months ago my husband was texting my sister inappropriately and she told me. I have asked them both for years to stop talking and sneaking off bc I didn't feel comfortable with it. She continues to talk to him after my pleading snd so does he. He got pissed bc I confronted him and said he wants a divorve. He doesn't love me doesn't care etc. But says him and my sister are nothing more than friends. He is still living in our home and hasn't said anything about the divorce since. Same time all this happened I lost my vision in one eye, soon I lost my job bc of it and now I have lost my so called sister and husband. We have 3 kids but he ignores them. All he does is sleep, go to work and hunt. One day he's nice to me and flirting then he ignores me especially if he has spoken to my sister that day. If I go anywhere or talk to anyone he drills me. But he leaves all hours of the night to go see my sister at her work or go shopping. We sleep separate and I'm looking for a job now, have apps all over and just take care of my kids until I get a job. I love him with all my heart have been together since I was 15 married for 4 years. I don't know what to do, what he wants. He won't talk to me about "us" just everyday stuff. I don't want to be 2nd choice but I don't know if I can let go. I don't know what to do or what he wants. I'm going crazy, can't sleep, eat even think. Been keeping a journal, working out and shooting my bow to relieve stress.
Most Helpful Guy
i don't advocate divorce, but what you described here is a very one sided relationship. you love him but it doesn't seem that he loves you or at least does nothing to show you love. Even worse he is negligent of his fatherly and spousal duties, which to me is the biggest taboo in a marriage.
I think you should really consider if this guy is even worth keeping around. how he makes you happy. how he even parents his children.1
Most Helpful Girl
Awe, first off I just want to say how sorry I am that this is happening to you! You sound super sweet and you obviously have a lot of love for your family.
I can't believe your husband is treating you like this. You deserve so much better!
It's even worse that your own sister may be possibly involved in this as well. Shame on her! She should know better than to do that to her own sister!
My only advice is for you to stay strong. Sleeping in separate rooms I think is a good thing because at least you have your own space. Try to focus as much as you can on your kids, because they will be your sanity at this point. Lean on friends and family for support. I hope you have plenty of people who are able to help you through this difficult time.
I would distance yourself from your husband. If you don't want a divorce, give him some space. Then maybe tell him you would like to talk and work things out. If he is unwilling to work on this with you, then you need to face that truth and let him go.
As for your sister, I would cut her out of your life. She doesn't deserve to be in your life, even though she is your sister. I'm sure your family will understand. She is tearing up your marriage and she seems to even take some sick pleasure in it.
I would even go so far as to try and move away from your husband if it gets even worse. Why should you have to live in a household with someone who is hurting you so much?
I hope that this situation gets better for you!1