When I'm not around my fiance I think about breaking up, but when I'm with him I enjoy my time and think of how lucky I am to have a guy like him?

This this normal? We've been engaged for about 3 years and plan on getting married soon. When I'm not with him it's as though I'm actively trying to find stupid reasons to break up with him. Overall he's a great guy, he treats me exceptionally well, and we love each other a lot.

There is stress in the relationship because my parents do not approve and I'm not sure if that is why I'm having doubts (long story short it's only because he is not the same ethnicity as my parents and is a little younger than me but no one would be able to tell in terms of looks and maturity levels).

My friend who recently got married said she went through something similar right before she tied the knot. She told me it all went away the day of her wedding. I'm just wondering if this is really normal or if I should really reconsider.


Most Helpful Guy

  • when you say 'when not with him', do you mean like he goes shopping, you're thinking 'I don't know' till he gets back, or do you mean like, when you're apart for a few weeks?

    • we don't live together... we only see each other on week-ends usually because we both have demanding jobs and I live about an hour away now. So during the 5-7 days I don't see him.

    • That, to me, is a little less worrisome. Like if literally every time he walked out the door you were feeling cold, i'd be wondering. Where having doubts in a semi LTR is more common.

      Your friends like him and think well of the relationship? Sexual chemistry is good? You have similar goals for what married life would be like?

    • Yeah my friends like him... everyone likes him (besides my immediate family only because he isn't the same ethnicity as them... they don't want me to marry outside to keep the bloodline). Yeah sexual chemistry is good... we get along... he's like my best friend. I guess I just don't have confidence in myself and always seem to second guess my decisions. My main concern is probably having to deal with the stress of my family disapproving for the rest of my life.

Most Helpful Girl

  • Sounds like pre-wedding jitters. Perfectly normal.

    • Thanks... I hope it's just that! I haven't really had this feeling about our relationship before... and we've been together for 4 years.

    • Engagements, from what I've heard, tend to be exciting and fun but as the day comes closer, people talk about how 'finalized' marriage really is and they begin questioning if they're ready and wondering if they are with the right person because no one who gets married goes in wanting a divorce.

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What Guys Said 2

  • no your freind was right ignore your family negativeness. it will work out for you. your family doesn't live your life so there opinions so take a back seat t what important to you.

  • I feel the same with my fiancée. I constantly think about breaking it off. It does feel weird and lately, I've been thinking about my fiancée's best friend who I an very similar to. It's creepy how similar we are. Anyway, I think it's a natural thing because you're scared and overwhelmed whether you feel it or not.


What Girls Said 0

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