Can blaming it on the alcohol ever be a legit excuse?

I am thoroughly aware that alcohol can dull the senses, but to you guys out there, is claiming that you don't remember saying or doing something wrong just an excuse you use for being an asshole while you were drunk? Ladies, if you've ever been offered this excuse, how have you handled it & what was the outcome? I'm having a really hard time accepting this excuse from someone I am close to starting a relationship with because the action borders unforgivable. Instead of an apology, I was given an "I don't remember what I did " excuse.


Most Helpful Guy

  • I don't remember is such a big BS excuse. First off, no matter how "drunk" one is that person should alway know who he/she is talking to. That's part of being able to handle your liquor and have a "relationship" with anybody of anytype. Personally I would never date anyone that gets so wasted that is what I would have to deal with when alcohol is of concern, then trust comes into factor of what they might do when you're not there, again, I don't remember having sex with her, you get the picture. Good luck.

    • IThanks. I totally get the picture...sometimes it's difficult to see clearly when you've already fallen for that person. It helps when people reinforce what you kind of don't want to see.

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • I think so. I'm have had a number of nights where I don't remember what happened, although I am single so I only have myself to answer to. You used the words "close to starting a relationship" which means you two aren't an item. If you aren't an item, he doesn't have to explain himself to you. That sounds harsh, but really if he hasn't commited himself, chances are he isn't that serious about you

    • Thanks for your response.

What Girls Said 2

  • What was it he did or said? Everybody reacts to alcohol differently. For some, it is just an excuse, and for others, they literally do not remember anything that has happend, especially if they had too much bordering on alcohol poisoning.

    When I am under the influence, I still try my hardest to make the right decisions. For example, I have never given myself to anybody while drunk because I's something that I care about to my core.

    I usually don't take the excuse because unless you're passed out, you should not do anything you'd regret. Or at least be with somebody that'll make sure you don't.

    • At a big party, he said several things throughout the course of the night basically in revenge for seeing me give my number to a guy friend. He commented and was seemingly upset. He then flirted big time and tried to hook up with two female friends of ours. He was non-responsive when I was upset, & the folloiwng day texted me to ask why "everyone" was mad at him. I did not reply yet (2 days later), & he has not reached out again or apologized. I'm preparing for when/if I decide to talk.

    • Alcohol also amplifies things that you'd normally not bring up or would rather keep hidden. He probably felt jealous and wanted to get revenge on you for giving your number to that guy friend. I'm not surprised he didn't reach out or apologize yet because he might really not know what happened (if he was really that drunk) or he doesn't know what to say. In any case, it doesn't seem like he's the type to invest in because he may be the jealous type that gets revenge, like a sneak preview.

  • In short

    But here's the thing...I used to drink heavily and while I was drunk I never clearly knew what was happening. The next morning I would be told about all these people I made out with and I had no recollection, but this behavior is not responsible and if you know that when you go out you end up making out with a ton of people then the only way to honestly correct the mistake is to stop it before the whole thing can start by not drinking. So because I know that I will engage in a lot of questionable behavior if I drink...I don't drink.

    If you have a significant other that continues to engage in bad behavior repeatedly then you need to drop them.

    "Mistakes" cease to be mistakes when you make them more then once.