Marriage. I'm a little scared, isn't this normal though?

Me and my boyfriend have been together 1 and a half years now and we have talked about getting married since we were together 3 months. However, we both know how serious marriage is so we have never felt it right to just jump into it. I feel like he is the one I want to be with. He is trustworthy, handsome, honest, funny, and athletic. I know he will always take care of me and will be a great husband and father. He had to move away on business and I only see him weekends (which kinda sucks) . At first, when we found out he had to move one of our first instincts was just 'let's get married'. Soon after we just realized we just wouldn't feel right if we let something like that be the deciding factor, even though we wanted to anyway. I have been seeing him only on the weekends for 5 months now. School kinda keeps me busy and work too, but it still somewhat sucks.Nonetheless, I know I want to spend the rest of my life with him, but I'm just kind of scared about marriage. I honestly think EVERYONE is a little scared of marriage if they take it seriously. I want my marriage to be forever. Is it normal to be somewhat scared? I feel like most people are at least a little scared deep down. What do you think?


Most Helpful Girl

  • Marriage is scary and definitely nothing to be rushed into. It also isn't something that you need in order to "solidify" your relationship or change the way you feel for someone. If it is then you're getting married for all the wrong reasons. In this day and age it isn't uncommon for people to date for 10 years before getting married! Personally, I can think of 3 couples off the top of my head that have been together for 4, 6, and 7 years respectively. They all want to get married, but it isn't something that any of them feel rushed into.

    You're still very young and I don't think marriage should be quite as scary as you're making it out to be. Yes, it's scary, but it should also be very exciting and something to really look forward to. The nerves should be there, but they should be less so when compared to the excitement! You're still young and I don't think you're quite yet ready for that commitment. Stick to the weekend for now, finish school, move in together and start paying off some loans. Then get married.

    Myself? I'm with the man of my dreams. He and I have talked of marriage and kids and a future together. We know without a doubt we'll get married. We've been together a year. But we're both in med school. We want to wait until we've graduated and found jobs before considering marriage.

    • Yes, I agree about it is not needed to solidify a relationship. That is a wrong reason to get married. I didn't really think I was making it out to be that scary. I am excited and I can't wait, but then there is that little fear there that makes me a little scared. I just didn't know if that little fear was normal or not. Congrats on the man of your dreams :) agreed It would be a lot going on with school&everything else. I only have 1 year left until I graduate.

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What Guys Said 2

  • just Get Married

  • You're right to be scared. It's way too soon in your relationship to be considering marriage (especially with you still in school). Try living together first in the same city and see how that goes.

    • AGREED. if you guys really feel that strongly. co habitating for a year or so shouldn't bother you :)

    • Yes I think living together would be a good idea, however we can't due to religious views. Also, I'm not so sure that it is 'too soon' to be getting married. I know many couples that have been together less than we have and are already engaged. However, you can never compare your relationship to others because everyone's is different. So I guess it just all depends . . Also, I only have one year left of school (just to clear that up :] ) thanks for feedback

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