Does the high divorce rate scare you off and make you not want to get married?

Yes or no and why?
Does the high divorce rate scare you off and make you not want to get married?
Does the high divorce rate scare you off and make you not want to get married?

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Most Helpful Guys

  • Divorces are caused by three factors:

    1. Couples getting married without being ready to settle down,
    2. Couples getting married without knowing each other, and
    3. Couples getting married who are not willing to work on their marriage when they encounter problems.

    At my age, #1 won't happen. I won't marry a girl - won't even propose - unless I have known her for at least two years, so #2 probably won't happen. I know that I am not a quitter, so I only need to find an otherwise suitable candidate who is also not a quitter, and we will be good.

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    • 11 d ago

      #3, good luck with that. Especially when either party can now trigger divorces without any problems at all. No fault divorce='just because'.

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    • 10 d ago

      What this guy said! Can't compete with this answer! Spot on my man!

    • 9 d ago

      Thanks for MHO!

  • I think, if I wanted to get married, I would. The divorce rate has nothing to do with my relationship with someone I love.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • No they dont. Bcz in the end its not about the divorce rate number. Its about the relationship and the person u r with.

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • Yes. The fact is the divorce rates are mostly driven by women (70% of divorces are filed by women, mostly siting "no fault". Out of the 30% that are male initiated about 60% are due to the wifes infidelity. So predominantly female caused/driven divorce). The ones who pay the highest price in divorce however are men as they are the ones who lose access to their children (I cannot and would not want to imagine how that feels to have the government tell you your only allowed to see your children once every two weeks (if your ex allows it as she will not be held responsible if she decides not to let you see them if she gets vindictive) even as you pay substantial amounts of money into those very children you are not allowed to visit on your terms)), they lose their homes, their money etc.(male suicide doubles after divorce (males are already substantially more likely to commit suicide to begin with so those are high rates). So this is something that would and does concern me. I don't know if I would say it would stop me from getting married (along with the prohibitive costs of weddings), but it definitely make me far more cautious and uneasy about it (she would have to prove that she will not divorce me before hand through her actions and behaviors and any slight hint that she might would make me unlikely to marry her).

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    • 11 d ago

      How can 60% of divorces be due to women infidelity if men statiscaly cheat much more?

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    • 10 d ago

      That is a good thing. That people cheat less when they are married. They are supposoed to marry someone they love and will never cheat on. I cheated when I was in high school. I don't inent to cheat on my marriage. For example.

    • 10 d ago

      @ThisIsMyOpinion Well yes, though I think it would be better if they didn't cheat at all (that can cause a lot of trauma for some one). But yes despite what news articles like to claim or the media, its not as common as its made out to be.

  • It doesn't scare me off from getting married - but it makes me want to build my marriage on non-sexual principles since I believe a guy who marries me for my looks is less likely to stay with me when I become old and grey.

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  • If you have ANY doubts whatsoever about marrying someone, then you shouldn't get married because, frankly, you are not in real love with them.

    When you are in real deep true love, you have none-as-in-0-as-in-zero doubts about marrying the person.

    The divorce rates are high because people get married before they are mature enough and in love enough to do so.

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    • 11 d ago

      * AREN'T mature enough and (AREN'T) in love enough to do so.

  • Personally no. Mostly because those I’ve met in apparently unhappy marriages seem to often share something. They didn’t deeply know, understand, accept & want their partner. I’ve met many who will sit open mouthed that my husband love to talk for hours any chance we get. I get the same question from people older than me. “ what could you possibly find to talk about together for so long?” Which is a scary thought that most marriages that are sad seem partly due to their poor communication skills. I’ve also noticed a fair amount will admit to getting married due to a pregnancy & then staying for their children all while completely incompatible. I hear people toss the phrase soul mate around like a bean bag ball. Then you know these couples & it’s like what made them soulmates was an interest in football & comedies. It’s strange I think people jump into “love” & marriage with people before really knowing them. Seeing the worst parts to their partner. Understanding that marriage is about commitment not perfection. Learning that respect for your partner’s differences can only bring you closer. Taking an interest in their interests, joining in to please them sometimes but also appreciating they can do things separately sometimes too. I think people even lose themselves into marriage sometimes. Yes marriage is about intertwining two lives in love & commitment. But it can only work with two different people working together. Maintaining your identity, it matters. I think there are many factors when it comes to why people’s marriages don’t work. But the one thing I know is saying an exchange of rings, vows & paperwork is what “ruined” their relationship. Marriage isn’t a spell that changes its victims into beasts. It’s also not anyone’s way to a fairytale ending. Marriage is so much more work than a lot of people care to realize. Like anything else if your marriage is neglected it will rot. I don’t think marriage is for everyone but I think when done right by the right couples it can be something truly worth the work.

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  • Of course. Especially since the laws are structured so that I can be completely blameless and I am still going to be saddled with huge costs in the event of a divorce, including my retirement savings. Since I don't plan to have children, there's no rational financial reason to marry - the risks are far too high.

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  • Nope! I believe that when I find Mr. Right, I will be sure he is Mr. Right and no way would I let go off of him because knowing my way of loving, he wouldn’t want to leave either! 😄🤣

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  • Hell no! I know I can make it work. And I am waiting for the right woman.
    Whatever happens, happens. But I already know what i want in a woman, and what to expect from women. so I should be in good shape to find a wife in 3-6 years

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  • It does not scare me because I’m not into in marriage in the first place but if I was... who gives a flying fuck. Statistics are high for getting in car wrecks but we still drive even though we have public transportation and bikes and FEET to walk with. Same thing applies to marriage and divorce.

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  • No. There are explanations for the high divorce rate and contrary to what many people will tell you, it's not Feminism. People aren't communicating with each other like they used and they aren't devoting enough time into their relationship so that they can continue to grow instead of stagnating.

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  • I think a huge percentage of marriages fail because couples throw kids into the mix. They don't take the time to get to know each other before they start having kids. Then before you know it both become embroiled the lifes of their kids and they forget about living for each other. Stop having kids and your marriages will last.

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  • I still want to get married. I don't see why other peoples failures has anything to do with my success or failure 🤷‍♂️... they are all mutually exclusive events.

    Fear of failure is an irrational belief. It just gets in the way of achieving or getting what you want. It's just another excuse for being a coward. If you don't want to get married then fair enough... that's your life choice... if you do want to get married... then you better get on with it and bite the bullet.

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  • I never look at statisics. I only speak based off experience and what i see happening in my city. I still want to get married

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  • No...

    Lying, cheating partners and people losing interest in their partners over time are just a few of the many reasons why I have no interest in marriage.

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  • Not divorce itself, but no-fault divorce laws. You can be faithful and the primary earner, and if your spouse is unfaithful she or he still gets half of everything and probably gets part of your future earnings. The risk is not worth the reward.

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  • I'm not scared of getting married. I know I won't rush into a marriage. What I am scared of is my husband cheating and lying.
    Otherwise I'm not scared to get married. I'm actually really excited to get married. I have so much love to give and I can't wait to share my love with my husband and then some day share my love with my kids!😊

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  • Yes it does , beacause the "papers" and the court always favors women
    and its kinda scary to know that if she feels like divorcing she can take 80% of your stuff and kids also and u gotta pay the alimoney
    Like what the fuck...
    No wonder why guys dont want to marry any more

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  • Half of all marriages end up in divorce. That’s like saying everyday you drive to work, there is a 50% chance of you getting squished by a truck.

    I know it’s a bad comparison but this is exactly how guys see it.

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  • No. It just reinforces my belief in really getting to know someone before popping the question. Living with them during the engagement and setting up a solid pattern of open communication and reasonable expectations. I am looking forward to marriage and being able to depend on one person and celebrate life with her.

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  • TOTALLY!!! History is proving that it is just too pong and people get too bored and sick of them. The very few who have a solid happy relationship, AWESOME FOR YOU, I know of 2 couple like that but they are definitely the only ones. Would be great to actually bump into someone who you literally want to spend your life with them... But the chances are not in my favour.

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  • Well... That's one way to look at it. Unless you're the vast minority.
    Also what will make you think, that you won't join the divorce conveyor? Optimism? Not, that you said you believe in marriage but only to make my point clear.

    High rates of something tends to be linked directly with the way things just are.

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  • No.
    Couples rush into marriage, so the high rate of divorce is more a reflection of their poor decision-making and emotional immaturity than marriage in and of itself. I would be absolutely sure about someone before I did that, and that includes living with them for a long while (full-time) before taking that big step.

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  • Yes and not only this, it's because i was in this situation, married for 9 years and got divorced by my ex who promised me that she prefers death on divorcing me but after years people change and they forget their promises especially if they were mentally ill...

    I wish if she have never loved me like this because now i have difficulties in believing any woman who tells that she truly loves me...

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  • No, I am afraid of change in attitude that I so often see from both women and men, they start taking each other for granted, stop trying, let themselves go, stop appreciating the relationship, I'm afraid of that.

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  • 70 to 80% of divorces are filed by women depending on what stat you choose to believe while 20 to 30% are filed by men. In both cases the most common reason for the divorce was the wife's infidelity so it is females that are mostly breaking up families. The average length of a marriage is down to around only 8 years. The risk factors for men are enormous. Add to that child custody law and child support which also greatly favor women and it is a no-win situation for men.

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    • 11 d ago

      The percentage is 70% don't try to inflate it. Also men statisticaly cheat more so how can the number one reason be the women's infidelity? Where are you getting your information?

  • Of course it does, because the overwhelming majority of damages paid in divorce, both emotionally and financially, is paid by men. So that means, in the event of divorce, I'm the most likely one to get screwed, and there will be a line of lawyers ready to kill one another to help my ex-wife screw me over.

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  • I don't want to be married anyway. It's only really for those who believe in God. ( Even though I myself believe in God/gods. )

    It's a waste of money if you ask me. You might get divorced within a week or so. Pointless. Unless you're REALLY committed to having no one else, but that's never true nowadays. It's rare.

    I want just one person in my life to love me the same way where we're ALWAYS faithful, Loyal, Honest, Kind, and loving to each other.

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  • Men getting legally abused is what keeps me away from marriage.

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  • Nope. False, untrustworthy and adulterous women backed by the gynocentric legal system do. It's easier to buy someone who hates you a house and to put them on a salary for the rest of their life.

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  • No I’m not scared because I refuse to let statistics define me. Also getting to know each other and leArning how to deal with differences before they guy decides to propose. That I will do next year.. wish me luck ☺️

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  • No it just reinforces that you make good choices and do the right and necessary things.

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  • No. I know that we both would put effort in the marriage and that we would first work on our marriage before doing something drastic like divorce.

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  • It's one of the factors that makes me not want to marry.

    The other being I have more to loose than to gain in marriage.

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  • Yes.
    It a big reason Im not running to the altar any time soon

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  • Nope. I still want to get married someday. Not because so many people get married too young, rush their marriage, aren't able to fix the problems in their marriage, get married just to settle because they think they can't find better, etc.. Doesn't mean that's how it will be for me.

    I do want to marry the love of my life someday. Be his lovely wife and have beautiful kids with him. And live with him as well as long as we possibly can. And what other people do in their own life and relationship won't affect mine.

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  • No it does not I want to get married one day I have to find someone to love first though

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  • No, marriage isn't something I'd rush, I'd make sure I knew we were going to work and we were both willing to do everything so that it would or I would say yes.

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  • Yes... I an anyway don't think ever will get married nor do I want to

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  • The way women use divorce as a weapon to destroy men's lives, the way they plot and scheme and lie in court and set their husband up years in advance and go into marriage with the explicit goal of staying married exactly as long as it takes to win the most alimony in the divorce. . .

    Makes me not have any respect or trust for women.

    If more than half of all women are doing that and the other half think it's just fine for their sons and brothers and fathers to have no rights and no legal recourse when it comes to divorce and child custody, then fuck 'em all. They obviously think of men as just stupid livestock.

    Snakes. Vipers.

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  • Nope married for 25 years to second wife. 1st wife lasted less then two years.

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  • Yeah. I'm not interested in marriage. Too many unhappy people

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  • No. Divorced people don't make my decisions for me or for my soon-to-be wife. We make our own decisions.

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  • No it doesn't. I have confidence in my choices for companionship 💙💚💜

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  • Not really. Its obvious as to why the divorce rates are so high. Look at society and what they're promoting and I'll leave it at that🤷🏾

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  • No, the existence of marriage makes me want to not get married.

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  • I am not on the market for marriage yet but it is not so much the divorce rate that is giving me an issue here but rather why do people need a paper to live together.

    It is possible to have children, to own a house, to have a common bank account even if you are not married. So why are there still so many out there that feel they need a paper that will cost them half of their assets if they divorce.

    This way of thinking eludes me.

    If I find my SO, then I will live together but certainly not get married.

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  • The numbers of the word straight is actually a misconception. The high divorce rate is caused by people who had second and third marriages. Not first marriages. Maybe we'll end up divorced because they don't want to do what they need to do, they don't understand what marriage really is let alone any kind of relationship with people yeah, and they often times have been sexually active before marriage. It has nothing to do about marrying young or people not ready for marriage. It's all about selfishness. And when you look at people today and how they treat their relationships, and the many poor relationships with their exes with multiple partners it really makes you question what and not anybody's really suitable for a marriage in the first place let alone dating.

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  • It's one of the reasons. But you should focus on more personal reasons related specifically to you.

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  • Yes. I'm one of those that added to the divorce count. She cheated on me snd it took over 3 years to finalise.

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  • no

    The inequality in divorce court does where a woman takes half a mans earnings does

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  • Yes and the fact men get bad deal. https://youtu.be/-A4Nbo-iAgY

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