Why does he act like nothing happened?

I have known him for a couple months. I’d like to preface this story by saying that we act strictly in a manner reserved for good friends and while this guy may sound like a complete sleazebag, he is actually quite religious and a GOOD person. We have a great friendship, great chemistry, we understand each other really well and share the same humor. We both have demanding jobs in the same field, we confide in each other, vent to one another and can relate. People who don’t know our situation actually comment on our chemistry and tell us we are the perfect couple. Ha. If only they knew. He is engaged to a girl who does not live in the U.S.A. and he says that things have been “going downhill” for several months. I admit I have always been attracted to him, but obviously I would never act on any of my feelings. We talked everyday, hung out often despite our busy schedules etc. Guilt and uneasiness regarding his engagement status started eating away at me and I finally confessed that I liked him and because of that I was going to back off because our friendship was doomed to be “done” when his fiancée entered the country (she probably doesn’t know I exist) and he agreed that we wouldn’t be the same when she did come. It was obviously in my best interest to walk away. There is even speculation that he could marry this summer, though when I asked him, he said “possibly, who knows. It’s complicated. Anything could happen.” He keeps saying it’s complicated and that his best friend does NOT want him to marry her. He said even if he were to break things off with her, he didn't want it to be because of another girl. He admitted that he was very attracted to me and that he never expected to meet me or for us to understand each other so well. He then went on to say that he had thought about whether I liked him or not but that he had convinced himself that I thought of him only as a friend. He followed this comment with “well aren’t you glad that we both have so much self control? Think of how much worse of a position we’d be in if we had actually done something…” yeah. WTF. After this rather awkward conversation, I told him we probably couldn’t continue on being friends because the intention (at least on my part) was not appropriate, considering he is engaged to be married. He didn’t understand why we couldn’t just “stay the same”. I told him I just wasn’t willing to go through any more of this drama and left it at that. afterward I was devastated… because I lost a good friend. I did not contact him, but a couple days later he started sending me emails and texting. The tone of these messages were very familiar, like nothing had ever happened. WTF?! His fiancée is supposedly coming REALLY SOON. What is the reason why he can’t just let this go? He doesn’t have to wait long for her to get here—so I doubt it’s an “I’m lonely” issue. I gave him a VERY VERY easy, drama-free “out” and he’s not taking it. WHY is he doing this to me? I'm SO CONFUSED!


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  • what end up going on?