Is there a good way for a woman to propose marriage to a man without “stealing his thunder”?

- In my experience, propose the question if he'd want marrage in the future and whether he would be ok with you proposing or prefer being the one to do it... this isn't the same as proposing.
My best friend and her fiance had this conversation and discussed it, but that wasn't the same as proposing it was just establishing how eachother felt about it, once they were both on the same page they ended up both proposing to each other as surprises and it made them happy...
Recently, I've had a similar conversation with my partner. Basically saying that I'm not ready now, but in a year (as we both finish out postgraduate then) it would make me happy if he was more than just my boyfriend, and discussed whether we would be happy with which proposing and the result was that he plans to before I do on principle (i quote "i better get there first then") as we are both competitive, but I'm still planning my own proposal for him as I know it will make him happy. (Likely picnic in the summer I'm thinking)
Basically, this type of stuff people dont discuss because they want it to be a surprise. Unfortunately, that usally means both parties are left in the dark about what the other what so not to ruin the magic. But talking about whether 2 people want to get married, when they feel they will be ready and how they feel about the other proposing is something that will help clear understandings and could make the relationship stronger in the sense of neither party worrying about the situation as everyone knows the deal...
I hope this helps...Is this still revelant?
Most Helpful Girl
- If he's not the type with a fragile ego who will take it as an insult like JoelDalton, I'd say just a sweet proposal somewhere nice would be ideal. You gotta know who your with tho, women proposing is kinda new so do it with care. However if he takes it the wrong way and is more focused on "I'm the man I should be the one to ask, I should be the one to decide when we get married," instead of thinking oh shit she really loves me than you probably dodged a bullet. The only reason historically men where the ones to propose is because they where the ones who where the primary breadwinners, owned land and had the necessary resources. If you support yourself and have your own life you have every right to broach the subject/propose.Is this still revelant?
Most Helpful Guys
- Anonymous1 yI wouldn't recommend it especially if your unsure if he's going to say "yes". I think you should drop some hints and or maybe ask him his outlook on marriage and if he's not opposed of the concept then dig a little deeper and ask if he could see you as the type he would be interested in with that type of commitment and if he says yes then utilize comic relief maybe witch is a good way of breaking the ice for expressing concerns to get results. For instance say " well what are you waiting for then"? And maybe say what do I have to take the initiative on this one?" Lol. And his response will let you know where his heads at with the whole idea and will in turn give you the answer of the route to takeIs this still revelant?
- No. This is wrong on so many levels. Don't do it.
The only way it could possibly work is if you have a girlie boyfriend, like he cries more than you, maybe he calls you mommy, you pay all the bills where he wears an apron and bakes cookies, he waxes his whole body and wears thongs for you. This kind of relationship it makes sense for you to propose. Otherwise don't.
Women are the gatekeepers of sex, men are the gatekeepers of marriage. A man who you just met who you do not like, who is very pushy and rude and grabbing at you sexually... thats the equivalent to a girl proposing to a man. Dont be that.Is this still revelant?
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817- If you do it with incremental suggestion like - I would love to buy this for my future daughter - where would you like to live if we move in together one day? Would you still love me if we were both old?React
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- I've kind of jokingly ask him to marry me to see his reaction and he always thinks im joking everytime. I honestly don't think he'd take it seriously especially the fact were both still very young.
Maybe just ask him to his face about his feelings on marriage and if he's ready yet.ReactLike
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- Two completely different guys , Joel is a Republican and Hawner is a Democrat. One man submissive and one dominate.
I will answer it. If he is more conservative like Joel , then it would be a mistake. If Hawner , more liberal , it turns out ok. What is this guy?ReactLike
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- Yes, you can propose without proposing.
Tell him why you love him, remind him of all the good times you have had together, and just tell him that you want to marry him.
At the same time, men have this stupid, obnoxious thing called pride. Sometimes it's a good thing. Other times it's stupid af. Whatever you do, let him be the one to get down on his knee as a symbol of life long service to you, and tell you that he loves you, and ask you to marry him.ReactLike
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- There is NO problem with a woman that proposes to a man.
If he gets angry over such a thing then he is extremely mentally limited and hence, someone that will make your life harder.
I would find it very cute and sweet if I get proposed to and I will really value the courage and determination of that one lady who does.ReactLike
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2 People
Will you also clap your hands and jump in joy while she's on her knee proposing to you?
@Syrian_survivor This sort of toxic judgmental generalization that only comes from the mentally limited, I know it very well. :) You cannot stand anything that challenges your pre-defined set of rules for how "a man should behave", snowflake.
Those rules are set there for a reason, they're not predefined, they're reasonable and logical, go ahead, be a submissive beta boy who lets his woman take initiative, see how unhappy you'll get eventually and how powerless you'll feel
"Mentally limited" dumbass- Show All Show Less
@Syrian_survivor "They are reasonable and logical", this is the problem with you, you cannot see from the eyes of others. You cannot read others' true intentions and you judge them based on superficial indicators that lead to nowhere. I really hope that things will change for you as you grow older, that you will understand that life doesn't work this way. Because if you remain this way, whoever you marry will suffer hard. (unless she has the same issue of course)
Anyway, I apologize if I was on the defensive previously, I should have considered the age gap, trust me, from 19 to 24 will really make a huge difference for you. I'm a really different person from the 19 y/o version of me.
- "Robert, we have been going out for a while now, do you like me?" Helen smiles as she holds Robert's hands.
Robert looks at her confused, "Of course, what are you talking about?"
Helen tightens her hold and glares at him, "When are you going to man up and propose to me?"
Or something like that. He will give you an answer. You might like it. Or you might not.ReactLike
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1 Person
- I say just tell him you want to get married and see what he says. Then leave it up to him to actually proposeReact
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- I would def prefer for my man to propose to me. Just seems proper to me. Guess I'm sorta old fashioned lol 🤷🏼React
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- It really depends on the guy and how he feels about it in general. I could care less and it wouldn't bother me at all if she proposed.React
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- We're assuming here that he wants to be the one to propose? I'd say no then, but I would love to be proposed to.React
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- Why not street him to talk about marriage instead of putting him on the spot. Then things go wrong in marriage he blames you for purposing. Stay clear out of trouble.React
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- Sure, make him feel wanted, that way he has only one route, whereby he would be so obligated to host a physical engaged a engagement party and proposed to you infront of all your friends.React
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- You can make it casual, and then let him do the formal one if you want.React
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- Just ask him. If he thinks there was a thunder you stole, he is not the right one.React
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- Anonymous1 yPersonally, I'd hope either one of us would raise the subject privately and it happen organically and mutually rather than some grand gesture on one knee.React
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- Anonymous1 yYeah propose to him
Then you decide where you guys are going for dinner tonight
Then you decide where y'all gonna live next
While he sits back and makes sandwiches for you
Maybe get him pregnant soon tooReactLike
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- Yes, there is.
strong women intimidate weak men.ReactLike
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- There is not. Iād never stay with a woman who proposed to me.React
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Because Iām the man in the relationship. And when you do things that are the manās job it implies you think Iām not capable of being the head of the house. When that happens then you are showing that you donāt respect me which will cause nothing but problems for us.
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