Should I bring up marriage, or just let it go?

Right now, I am in a relationship with my best friend, soul mate, love of my life... I know it sounds cheesy, and I've never been that kind of girl, but he has completely swept me off my feet. I can't imagine having anyone else in my life (romantically) besides him. We've had a lot of conversations over the past month about this, and he feels the same way. We have both agreed that we would like to spend the rest of our lives together. However, he had said (before we started having these conversations) that he would like to finish school before he gets married. He is in the military, and won't finish his degree for another 2 years. He is certainly worth waiting for but... I'm starting to get possible signals that he is changing his mind about waiting. He made a comment about "our wedding" the other day. He also mentioned trying to find a job where he could make some extra money for the future. And finally, while having coffee with an old friend the other day, she casually mentioned that she heard that I might get a ring on my finger pretty soon. That one should be a dead giveaway, but I know how my friends like to gossip. So here's my question... should I ask him if he still thinks he wants to wait two years? Of course I wouldn't straight up ask if he is going to propose soon. I would just see if he is still planning on that. Or should I just let him keep hold of the reigns and see what happens? Guys... would that be a turn off for you?

like I said... my friends like to gossip, and I could be reading this all the wrong way. I'm just dying to know what he's thinking though


Most Helpful Guy

  • If he didn't seem interested in marriage, but you really wanted to, then it would be good to bring it up. Or, if he was really interested, but you weren't, then, also, bring it up.

    But he's clearly moving in the same general direction as you are, and an engagement is not the same thing as a wedding, meaning, you can get engaged soon, and still wait for the wedding.

    So, I'd leave it alone. Don't spoil his surprise. It's often the hardest moment in a guy's life to ask a girl to marry him, even if he's pretty sure she'll say yes, and if he's trying to make it special, and his "secret" gets out, he might be crushed.

    It sounds to me like things are all good. Leave them be.


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What Guys Said 2

  • Either he pretended to wait for a long time, or he's changed his mind. Either mind it's his intention to surprise you,

    Don't bring it up, take it as it comes.

  • If you guys are soul mates and he feels the same way I don't think that bringing it up would be a good idea since it might pressure him. But I don't know you or your partner, it really depends on how your relationship is. If you're honest with each other and have an open mind relationship then do bring it up and see how he responds.


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