In your opinion, how many years is a long time to be together but not be engaged?

I never really thought about it this way because I don't think there's a set time? I mean I think its a personal choice between the couple. But I often hear things (being said to couples not to me) like, "Wow and you're not engaged yet?" when they have been together for maybe 5-7 years.

I personally feel if you're going to be together hypothetically your whole life what's the rush?

So my questions are...

1) In your opinion how many years would YOU consider to be a long time to be together and not be engaged?

2) Is there some expectation in general that couples should be engaged within the first couple of years of the relationship?

3) Why are people in such a hurry?!



Most Helpful Guy

  • 1. Depends on the circumstances. Generally a few years, but my brother waited seven with his soon to be wife because they started dating when he was going into college and she was a junior in high school. He waited to propose until she was about to graduate college.

    2. There does seem to be a cultural expectation in America for couples who are together for awhile to tie the knot/make it official.

    3. We aren't getting any younger, and marriage is still widely considered to be the foundation of a family.


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 2

  • 1) Beyond 3 years

    2) No, I wouldn't say so

    3) People are generally afraid of ending up alone

  • 4 - 5 years


What Girls Said 2

  • I find that even 2 years is long for me...

    the expectations should meet each other. if your partner wants to wait and you want to wait, it works out. but if you two are just meant to be and there's a connection soon (like in my relationship) then it will happen earlier than 2 years.

    not all people are in a hurry, but some base it on maturity and if they're ready to be married and have considered how serious or how big of a decision is. I know I am ready to be married.

  • It depends on your ages when people start to make those comments. For younger people, you get more leeway. For people in their mid to late twenties and early thirties, they pressure you to get married within the first two years. Then once everyone is divorced again at 35-40, people start dating again however the feel like dating.