Girl and married man emailing, and CC'ing his wife?

so that the wife knows 1) that her husband and the girl are talking and 2) what they are talking about. And girl replies to the husband, CC-ing the wife. The conversation doesn't exactly include the wife, but the girl and man do it so they don't seem like they're emailing BEHIND the wife's back. And assuming this is a harmless, personal (i.e. non-work) email. My church suggests this to cut out any potential suspicion/tension between married parties.

What do you think of this idea? Please explain your answer, thanks!

  • Good idea.
    Vote A
  • Bad idea.
    Vote B
  • Neutral.
    Vote C
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Really interesting answers. I personally don't agree with it either. I find it almost silly. I mean it's a nice gesture if the husband thinks to CC his wife "just in case she gets upset" or something, but like you guys say, if that were the case there are probably insecurity issues in the first place... Thanks everyone.


Most Helpful Guy

  • The couple needs to work on their trust and security issues, rather than fostering and encouraging them to happen. Many people don't attack issues in their lives, no matter what they may be, because they're "too hard". They take the easy route and try to ignore their problems, or assume that initial ideas with no thought behind them and their effects will work.

    So yeah, this couple is doing nothing to fix this issue and are instead just allowing it to fester.


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 3

  • If a SO is that insecure about the relationship there's a lot more serious problems they need to deal with than emails from the opposite gender. I guess your church is giving up on trust in a relationship

  • I hate this idea. I have many platonic female friends, and every time a date/gf gets jealous or forces me to choose between her or my friends, I always choose my friends.

    • bros before hoes bro.

  • you don't even have to think about this you already maid up your mind. now follow it


What Girls Said 3

  • Its just as easy to add CC as it is to not do it. Doesn't prove anything. I'd need to read these emails and know these people to be able to form a better opinion.

    • Innocent emails like planning events or whatever between people of generally good character. Like recently the husband sent me a "Thanks for planning that great party, good luck with your work" kind of email and CC-ed his wife. I found it really weird because she's not involved, and what, when I email him back saying "Thanks and good luck too" I have to include her? So that's why I'm wondering if it's just me that thinks this idea is cuckoo.

    • Show All
    • Part 2: because his wife won't let him give out his number. The project got done but it was difficult. He invited me to his graduation party but uninvited me at the last minute because of his wife. That was my last straw with him, I no longer consider this guy a friend. He's in prison not marriage. I NEVER flirted or crossed any boundaries with this guy, we were classmates and I have a boyfriend. Also I never met his wife, so it's not because she didn't like me.

    • Part 3: Some relationships are just controlling and insecure. I would stay as far away from them as possible. It's just a situation waiting to blow up.

  • They shouldn't be emailing each other in the first place. I wouldn't be emailing a married man because for what? why would we be friends in the first place

  • she is bi-curious and the girls is being examined as a possibility of the 3rd wheel.

    Unless the girls is bi curious too, I suggest she get a grip and move on.

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