Mother in law ruining my personal life - What to do?

Well here's the story. My mother in law owns a house but due to relocation of her job she can't stay in the house as it's too far away. She is renting a room for the next 4 years and then she'll go on pension and move back in the house and we'll probably buy our own place.
To help her out my girlfriend and I offered to rent her house and we agreed that it was OK for my MIL to come home every 2nd weekend in her own part of the house (own entrance, room and bathroom. I'm not very found of my MIL (who is?) but I'm OK with that agreement.

But.. she's been here 2-4 times a week, every week. She doesn't call or do anything to let us know that she's here and she doesn't respect our privacy. When we have friends over she wants to mingle with them and to be honest.. it's really, really F'ing awkward and I just want her to piss off but she doesn't take a hint AT ALL.
She's very easy to offend and my GF is scared of starting a fight with her and suggested that whenever she's around we leave the house so that she'll realize we do not want to be around her but I just want to tell my MIL how it is, that we have an agreement of her being here every 2nd weekend in HER part of the house and not 2-4 times a week in OURS.

I feel like Raymond´s wife in 'Everybody Loves Raymond' and i seriously DO NOT want to live with my MIL! I don't want to piss of my GF but I have my limits and we're far beyond already and so I always stay at my home office all night or go to a friends place just to avoid her. And sex? Nope not getting any unless we are certain she's visiting someone else or she might jst walse into our bedroom looking for us.

What to do?


Most Helpful Girl

  • Well, from what I understand you guys are doing her a favour by renting it out, so it helps her pay for shit.

    You're going to have to grow a pair and tell your mother in law to learn what boundaries are and how to respect them. If your girlfriend is too much of a wuss to stand up to her own mother, you're going to have to do it for her, if you're seriously fed up with this shit (I know I would be).

    Honestly, the best solution would be for both you and your s/o to sit down with the mother and tell her, that she's being invasive and disrespectful. Offended? Tough shit, you guys need your privacy. If she can't accept that, tell her you'll just move out and she can manage her own house all by herself, if she thinks it's alright to waltz in uninvited against all agreements.

    I know it sounds harsh, but some people honestly have no respect and just butt into everything and think they can get away with it.

    Or you can do the passive-aggressive shtick and show up at HER house every other day and just passionately make out in front of her. I'm sure she'll love that lol.


Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 1

  • Sounds like a bad arrangement should have had an agreement in writing. If it were me I would move out get my own place since that's what your planning on doing. Why pay all that rent then start over & buy your own place


What Guys Said 1

  • if you have it in writing, make her abide the rules.
    if you dont have it in writing, move out from the next month or so (after finding a deal) as it would be better to live in a less spacious place but will no intrusion.