#FeelFreeToList #MerryChristmas
If you make more then the rest of family, should everyone chip in or should you buy all the Christmas gifts?

#FeelFreeToList #MerryChristmas
- I think that its nice for everyone to chip in.
My two sisters don't make much money and both have 3 kids. I don't like one of my sisters so my mom buys her and her children's gifts while I buy my favorite sister and her children's gifts. That way we don't go broke, lol.
& I only get my parents something every two years. Since I'm single with no kids I pay and just put my sisters names on them since all their money goes to their kids.
If your family members are able to chip in though it'd be ideal. That way it really is from everybody and you're not the only one spending your hard earned money every time.
Only if they want their name on the gift though. Cause not everyone wants to spend money and prefer more creative gifts instead.Is this still revelant?Im not even wrapping this year lol. I was always a horrible wrapper. Im packing wveryones gifts in the laundry room and will drag it out on Christmas 🤣👌 but you tripped me out about not buying one sis stuff
I got sick of spending hours upon hours buying gifts for wife's nieces and nephews (I know they were mine too by marriage but still...) I never got to see them open the gifts nor any feedback or a real thank you just some generic pre thanks and I think they returned the gifts anyway so I said fuck it, gift cards all the way around.
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@DizzyDesii lmao. It's a way to split costs. So I take care of one sister and her family while my mom does the other. & it's from both of us.
I'm a terrible gift wrapper, but find it fun haha.
I don't blame you though. Being in charge of everyone's presents then wrapping them all by yourself?
Hell no.
- My family has money. But that would not be a smart way to spend money with however much money you earn. I just don't believe in buying into the commericailzed Christmas. Every family is different.
Last year... I bought my whole family 10-12 adults, two pair of Christmas socks along with $5 scratch cards... we all had fun playing and sat around with all mixed match Christmas socks...
We like the fun than see how much we can spend.
However... little kids... by around 15ish... they don't want presents. We just give money and socks lol...
The little little ones like to unwrap gifts for fun...
over all its the fun/spirit we do..
not how much money we spent.Is this still revelant?We also prefer money over gifts. But my fam would spend the money on bills and then still complain about not having the actual item they wanted. So im buying everyones item. It wasn't about the price but all of their gifts happened to cost 300+ each.
That's very generious of you.
I don't spend more than $50. on any of my family memebers if they are working adults.
Holiday spirit is fun and laughter... if you are buying for 2-3 people thats over $1k...
I don't agree with how it works.
Even if I make $10k a month and have no financial burden... it just doens't work like that in my family.
They will never accept any Christmas presents over $100k...
I have ordered in over $100. catering dinner for the family... my brother/sister all chipped in after I paid with my credit card.Yea i normally spend $100-200 per person. But yea this time its $300+ and its just for 4 people. 5 if you include me having to buy for myself
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i read through all your other responses. I don't agree with the way how things work.
Appreciation comes from hard work.
If I only make $200. a month way back in HS. I learned to save up to buy myself expensive stuff, if I want... none others are needs... our needs are not so expensive. (food, clothes, shelters - most expensive). Due to my family's upbringing, we don't ask for expensive things from others. Because its not their responsiblity to take their hard earn money to buy me the things I can't affort just becasue i want it.
At this point, my family make good money.
Now that I think of it... I make the most out of all my siblings. I make over $100k a yr. and thats just my own salary... We all have a lot.
We also have a lot of young kids 7 grand kids, we give to my parents.
One time... my little boy said (he was prob. 5-6 years. old) .. grandma gave me 2 candies, she is spoiling me. lol
I want to share... its easy to make money. Its hard to learn to manage money.
I don't agree with enabling others just because thats what they want.
We will all go broke if one person buys everyone what they want. My apology, life doesn't work like that...
I told my brother... now that we are all parents and have a lot (a few rental houses for extra money) ... as family, we are learning how to work together to teach these children how to manage the hard earn money we are making... how to manage the properities we have now... so they don't turn out to be homeless by spoiling them and wanting the biggest tv or splurge in their wants.
We taught them.. they will get their needs for free...
Their wants... they have to earn it.
When they get good grades and help out, they get their wants.
Good luck Miss Dizzy...
Money management lessons that have been lost in our soiceity/family sturcture.Yea I've been good with money management in past years but not this year. Its possibly my last Christmas with em before i move away so i just wanted to get em what they really want as a going away gift ig. Because im not payin for shit else once i move 🤣 theyve been using me for money since 2015. Im tryna be outta here yo
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2150- I think gifts need to be creative and personal. If I can't think of more personal gifts to give then I typically won't give them one sometimes. Only one gift meant everything to me and it was a Wii with wii sports and Zelda Twilight Princess. I bawled when I saw it cuz I knew it was etremely hard for my family to get one. There was so much more to it. Every other gift I was happy for but like never meant the same. I only recently figured its because I felt like family was disconnecting, I became known for only being into games and movies and I don't know just always feels like a lot of lost distance between people every holiday season. Fake smiles and laughs to the same jokes repeated almost daily, prolonged sermons on how the world will end also repeated almost daily but holds a special spot before and after prayer for holiday meals anyway, thats now my family so I don't know, only recently started planning gifts for multiple people and I have like little inspiration to go by but I hope it works out for all of us in the end. For your mom I say its at least fair she loses her gift though, people no matter their age or rank need to be taught lessons too. We are all children as also said in the bible, you seem to be the adult of the house.React
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Yea aside from my grandpa, they dont like personal gifts sadly. Theyre too materialistic. And believe me i wanted to drop my moms gift but i just sucked it up and said, well this is the last Christmas for a while so i’ll just give it anyways
- Personally, I can afford to buy gifts that maybe more expensive than what others are able to afford. Knowing that, I'm very grateful for even a card from others, I'm happy that they at least thought enough about me to get me something. It really is the thought that counts. Not that I would turn down expensive jewelry if gifted to me and yet it would be just as precious to me as a card. I think the only way to enjoy the giving is to not feel self-conscious about what you could afford to give and just enjoy the act of giving itself. So, everyone should do their part in giving gifts in order to feel what Christmas is all about. It really does feel good.React
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- I think Christmas is great but it shouldn’t be about the gifts. All I want for Christmas this year is to be able to spend the day with my family... have a meal with them but I can’t. I couldn’t care less about gifts. I don’t need anything nor do I want anything.
I think people should buy something that makes them think of the person they’re shopping for. Doesn’t matter if it’s cheap. I bought a friend a NZ$60 necklace last year and she funnily enough bought me the exact same one. We both love the necklace and wear it all the time.
Anyway it’s the thought that counts. Smh people bickering about how much their gift cost... if someone wants an expensive gift then they must buy it themselves.ReactLike
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I said i wanted to buy them jewelry and meaningful stuff and they my mom/grandma were like “thats it?”. So yea no theyre too materialistic sadly
- I don't believe people should be told how much they should chip in. They should put in the amount they can afford. Then when the money is all collected, a gift for the amount collected should be purchased. It takes the enjoyment out of Christmas and giving gifts when you're told how much to spend on people
Some people may earn more money , but that doesn't mean they have much money left over after their bills etc are paid. Some people who earn more money have more debt or higher bills to pay, which leaves them with very little left over to buy giftsfir people.ReactLike
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And i feel you on that. But if you knew what the gifts were they wanted, then youd see why i asked for
At least 25% of
The cost lol
- This is all relative in my family currently as both me and my sister are studying. My mother currently earns the most, and she's often the one to splurge out. But we she does it because she wants to and because she loves us, rather than from obligation. And we simply buy within our budget. To me, the notion of family rigidly deciding on whom must pay the most seem strange and not really in the Christmas spirit.
But soon I'll be graduated with a Master's degree, and that will easily land me employment with an expected pay of 33-35000 kronor a month. In dollars that's 3800-4000 dollars. Then I'll certainly chip in more.ReactLike
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My fam didn't decide i must pay the most. They stated what they wanted yet knew theybcouldnt afford what they wanted. So i said i’d pay 75% of the expenses if they chip in on 25%. Because u make more than my mom, she expects me to pay more than the rest
That's fair enough. I won't tell anyone how to do their Christmas, to each their own.
- This sounds like an awful Christmas idea. You are making it a chore/task. It's no longer about the family and being together. Now you have everyone needing to spend a lot of money so you can buy nonsense gifts just so you can flaunt how much money you make. I'm glad im not apart of your family. You would ruin Christmas.React
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You clearly dont know how to read. On other Christmases, when i buy them certain stuff, theyre never satisfied. I offered to buy meaningful stuff this Christmas and their ungrateful response was “thats it?”. So i offered to get them what they actually want. All i asked is they put about $75 on it. I’m putting $225 on each gift so how is that unfair on my part? You need to go recalculate your judgment sir. If it were up to me, we’d just spend time together but theyre the ones who are materialistic and have to have Christmas gifts. Im the one nice enough to buy them something they actually want instead of them receiving the typical stuffed animal and snowglobe from my grandpa that they never want
- I’m gonna be honest with you I’m just as happy with a box of chocolates as I would be with a 300$ watch.
And I honestly prefer cheap gifts rather then expensive ones because I don’t feel like I earned it if I didn’t buy it myself when it comes to expensive items.
and if given cash I just spend it on bills or put it away and save it.
I also never ask for gifts.
my father makes the most follower by me and then my sister.
i also don’t feel that the person who makes the most should buy everyone’s gift.
In my family everyone buys a gift for everyone. Though if you want to buy more you can.ReactLike
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Yea we all usually buy several gifts for eachother. But its often stuff we forget about by the end of the month. So i just wanna surprise them all with the stuff theyve asked for all year but figured they wouldn't get it due to the price.
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- It's Christmas. It never hurts to be a giver. Plus they are not strangers to you. They are your family. Give not because you feel you are obligated to do it. But give because their happiness also makes you happy. God blessed you with a good source of income, so time to share the blessings right? Plus what u sow it was u reap. The more you give the more u can be bless.React
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I dont make that much. I just make more than them. And im paying 75% of each gift. I just asked if they could put 25% on their gifts because that could help or even go to their gift to me
Don't gift things you can't afford. Give them something according to a budget. You don't want to be broke after Christmas. If they are not happy, then don't give them gifts next time. If they want a specific thing, then they should buy it on their own.
Like i said, i can afford it. But the point was, they were posed to give me a gift in return. Like they agreed to it. However, i went ahead and bought my own gifts online since they dont know how to shop online. So the percent they wouldve given wouldve gone on their gifts or made up for the gift they had me buy for myself
- Try this, think how a political party would handle it.
Democrats. Would tax you higher and give it to the poorer people
The Republicans. Would give you a tax break and make the middle pay more
The Libertarians. Would tax everyone at the same rate and put it in a Christmas fund. Then everyone would pay the same % rate and everyone can get a 100 dollar gift.
The last one sounds like to be the most fairReactLike
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Im def a third party supporter. Normally not libertarian but in this case i would be.
- I don't like to ask, feels forced.
Also can't be bothered buying gifts for everyone just buy one for Dad, Mum, sister, Aunt and Grandma.
I also spend like a $100-$200 on Mum and Dad each but like $50-$100 on sister etc. 😂
A gift is nice but I can buy my own things. Those gifts just get recycled in the end lol.
Their time and their presence while with you though you can't put a price on that lol.ReactLike
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- I’d buy the gifts without wanting them to contribute as long as all of them didn’t ask for a PS5 😂😂 on a serious note though, that’s why it’s a gift. Plus they are all very appreciative, I remember sending my dad some money (I had just moved overseas and got my first job), he still have them to this very day and that was 5 years ago. He says it’s got sentimental value to him cause it’s my first hard earned money. So yeah, anything for the fam ❤️React
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- I mean this isn't traditionally how gift giving works. For my family we get everyone something each. My parents get me and my sister a few gifts, I get then one usually spend 30-40 but this year im making gifts. We then collectively get something for my grandparents and they give us something. Aunts and uncles only buy for under 16 because my family is so bigReact
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Yea we normally all buy for eachother but we dont often endup with what we asked for. So i was tryna make dreams come true this time around 😂 i just wanted 25% to help pay for it
- Gifts don’t have to be expensive. For Christmas my wife often gives me clothes she found on sale or at resale. Last year she gave me a North Face jacket she found for $14 from a resale shop. I love it. My sister sent cookies for my birthday. Very nice.React
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Its not that they HAVE to be expensive. But the things they want just turned out to be expensive lol
I want a Porsche and a garage to store it but I don’t expect someone to give me one. People can want many things without expecting someone to give them. If they can’t appreciate the thought and effort then maybe you shouldn’t bother with them.
- Short answer: I envy your life if that registers as a problem.
I am glad you are doing well, and so should your family...
... But do include your sister on it, so she doesn't feel like an odd woman or girl out!
It could be wrapping gifts, or shopping with you. You choose.ReactLike
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Yea my sis already knows what everyones giving. I just meant that she didn't have the money to chip in. She offered up money I've been givingher out of my checks but i didn't wanna take that. My mom feels after a certain age she doesn't have to be a mom anymore and that you owe her. My grandpa feels the same way. Its sad but true. My moms already taken over half of my sisters savings from me and that pisses me off. The deal was, i do groceries one week, you do groceries the next. I spend maybe 130-200 on groceries two weeks a month so thats like 250-400 on groceries a month. My mom was supposed to pay for the other two weeks. But she's been taking from my sis and that ticks me off. So yea i just wanna get them this last gift cause im mot paying for anything else after i move away
- I would maybe do a fair balance, do the normal gift amounts but add a small bonus, help out with food to some extent unless you already do and maybe get a movie or two for the family off of the 20 dollar movie offerings off the tv. Something special and fun for the family to watch. Like Mulan for example although now you can get that for cheap Rental 😂React
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Well either way, I'm sure you could find a fair balance. I think only someone directly in your family can know. Id just trust your gut on this one
Well my sis knows about everyones gifts. I messed up in telling my mom about my grandparents gifts bexause she has to help me transport them. But she found out their gifts are 300+ each and she feels her gift should equal the price of theirs
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- You are not obligated to do that but it is a very sweet thing for you to do. I would definitely make them pay some contribution. In my experience, when people get something for free, they don't appreciate it. Make them contribute and it will mean more to them.React
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Yea my fam hardly appreciates anything but i just wanted to gift em once more before i move sometime next year
- Unless they don't have a job or makes smaller amount of money compared to everyone else ( like if all of my family members but my sister made a decent amount of money) then I wouldn't expect them to pay or chip in the same amount as everyone else but, I DO think they should have chipped in and gave you some in exchange... In fact, if I knew you were going to vet me a expensive Christmas ( or birthday gift since my birthday is also in near Christmas)React
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Yea cause all of our bdays surround the month of December by a month or 2 so i figured it could be a combo gift. I was just wanting a quarter of the expense from them. But i do feel kinda bad cause my grandma went through some stuff to get her portion and now i just kinda wanna give it back to her
*Christmas gift* ... Christmas gift (or birthday gift since my birthday is also close to Christmas) and I had a decent enough job to spare you that amount, then I would...
- Neither of your options.
Come Christmas gift time it's very simple: each person should give according to their means and give from their heart. Not a financial value. Their own thoughtful giving.
It really is the thought behind the gift that matters.ReactLike
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Lmao if that was the case, my pawpaw would give $20 and the rest would give $20-50. Theyre cheap people
So let them. Trust me, by the time you're closer to 50 it's always the thought behind the gift that matters.
Let them buy the gifts as well. I guarantee you'll see how much you mean to them.We’ve done so past Christmases. They were ungrateful and whined the whole time saying “i can't believe thats all i got. I really want this...”
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That says a hell of a lot more about them and how selfish their attitude is than anything else.
- I believe it might be a good idea to try to get a little alone time with each individual person away from everyone else (if it is possible) and maybe ask them if they are having financial troubles that might be keeping them from chipping in.. Explain your position and reasoning behind your plan and it might help you and them understand each other better..React
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Okay fair enough. Lol I didn't know all the details of the situation. Maybe then only get them a gift according to the percentage they chip in..
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These parts of the initial paragraph you wrote are the reasons I answered your question the way I did. I hope this helps ! I do make more than the rest of the fam atm, so I figured I’d buy everyone a $300+ each gift for Christmas. The most I asked was that they give $50-100 each to chip in. My grandpa gave less than I asked for, my grandma gave a good median, and my mom has yet to give something. I didn't expect my sis to chip in since she doesn't have a job yet, And if i end up not using it, I’d give it back to em.
- To expect one of your children or grandchildren to cover the costs of the families gifts is absolutely unprofessional; an odd choice perhaps, but everything else I want to say is really just inappropriate, especially given we're talking about your family.React
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Yea the plan was everyone get everyones gift, but to them, that means get what they can afford and not what you actually want. If it was up to them, they’d get stuffed animals and toys. Like they dont realize we’ve grown up. So i figured i’d buy everyone what they truly want as long as they give 25% of the expense
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