How to make you boyfriend appreciate you more without doing everything they want you to?

So my boyfriend wanted to mess around with this glass door wide open no blinds covering it or anything in his house I said no he got mad. He says your never spontaneous I said well I don't want anybody seeing me naked he says "nobody can see us" (-_-) the glass porch door was wide open the blinds weren't covering it. I do everything for him he wants some I drive over & we go to our "spot" Because he stays with his family I stay with my mom. He has a very high drive and loves what I do and I have never said no. He was scared to loose me when we had our day apart he said he promised to appreciate me more and so forth and we are fine but I want him to not get so mad when I say no I know I always say yes but I'm getting tired of it and my mouth is tired of it too (wink wink). I know I can be uptight but past relationships I was "too immature" or w.e b.c they didn't want to have fun now its the other way around how can I be more spontaneous but at the right times how can I say no to him without him getting mad b.c I do everything he wants me to do.


Most Helpful Guy

  • You're frustrated. You try so hard to do sweet things for your boyfriend and he never seems to notice or reciprocate. For example, last week, you picked up the tab for everything you did together. You bought him a nice lunch, a fancy dinner and the movie tickets- and all you got was a "thanks babe." You are constantly texting him to let him know that you're thinking about him, but he never does the same thing back. You even went out and bought him an expensive watch because you noticed that his old one wasn't working. Nothing.

    I think:

    Instead of doing really flamboyant things to make him notice, do really small (but significant) things instead. Remember whenever he has a big exam or presentation and send him a cute text wishing him good luck. He'll be so impressed and touched that you managed to remember a little detail like that and it makes you look even more amazing in his eyes. He might not say much to show his appreciate, but trust us- he's definitely thinking it.

    Sometimes, you may be doing the right things, but at the wrong time. If you bake him his favorite cookies on a random day just to be sweet, he'll happily thank you, eat them and be content. However, if you bake him his favorite cookies during a week that he's super stressed out, he'll happily and gratefully eat them and appreciate that you noticed his stress in the first place. It makes a difference.


    Haven't you heard that distance makes the heart grow fonder? If you're still feeling frustrated, try pulling back a little. Have yourself a girls' night, work ahead on your project, or do anything else that will keep you busy and make you unavailable. The point is not to play immature games, but just to put some healthy space between you. He will be so happy to finally see you again!

    • Heyy you cheated I saw that on another site.

    • hes being an ass and you're telling her how to better lay her role. are you serious?

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • sounds like a boy who throws a fit when he doesn't get what he wants.

    you should find a man lol

    • or maybe he should find me ;-)

What Girls Said 1

  • what is it exactly you're getting out of this relationship. outside of a tongue work put/.

    hes obnoxious manipulative disrespectful and completely dismissive.

    why are you with someone who doesn't respect your boundaries? or rather what is it about being with him that you are so desperate to hang on to that you defend yourself when he's just being a prick.

    if you're not comfortable with something, you don't need to counter that with all the lovely things you do. saying no. is quite sufficient. if he can't get that you should get out. he sounds like hell go from bad to sh*tty.

    but I don't mean to tell you what to do. that just my opinion. your opinion is what counts.

    so what's in it for u. being with him?


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