Hard to get? Should I talk to her?

She is a FOB Vietnamese (23) and is fairly shy. I’m a Korean-American, but was raised in America for nearly all my life.

We met at school back in Jan 2011 and developed a friendship from there. It went well. By June 2011, I gave her flowers and small gifts to express how I felt. At the time, she occasionally sent me messages, but that has all but stopped now; I have to send a message to her first. I also gave her a Valentine's and Christmas gift this year. She accepted them, so I assume that’s good. Since she’s super serious about school, we don’t see each other often, but we still hang out sometimes. Guess giving her a Valentine's gift didn’t scare her off. Also don't know if it matters, but she trusts me enough to go with me without family/friends tagging along.

A week and a half ago, I told her I loved her and she said something like “you shouldn’t say that” with a smile. I think she knew my feelings before I actually told her. Since then, we haven't spoken to each other, so I'm not sure if I should approach her at all or give her some room. Don’t know if she’s playing hard to get, I confessed too early, she’s uninterested, or what. She SEEMS interested in me, but the cultural differences don't help. Any advice?

PS - I only added in Vietnamese in case cultural differences mattered. I am aware they still share several traits with American, Chinese, and other girls across the world.


Recommended Questions

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 1

  • I wish I can meet someone like you.


What Guys Said 1

  • Pretty intense pressure from her family, no doubt, and she herself may not be willing to find a boyfriend outside her community. It's not uncommon especially if she's just here from Vietnam.

    Ask her if that's what is going on. She will answer you honestly. And if that is the case, there isn't anything you can do..say goodbye to her as nicely as you can.


Recommended myTakes