They say "actions speak louder than words"...

People say "actions speak louder than words". Do you think this can be applied to the dating world?

Women say they want a good guy, but we always notice a majority of them fall for the bad dude or the abusive jerk, and continue going back for them.

Men can do the same, but it doesn't seem to happen as often, from what I've observed.

What do you think about this?


Most Helpful Girl

  • Yes, I'm a strong believer of this. A guy's actions will make it or break it. I go for the nice guys but I want them to show me that they care for me instead of saying a whole bunch of things to sweet talk me. Even if it's just the little things, they mean a whole lot more than saying you're going to do all these things for me in the future. Words mean very little to me unless you can follow through with action.

    As for the bad boy thing, I can't really say much about that. I don't know the appeal and I've been friends with many who disagree with bs in relationships and go for straightforward good guys when they want it to mean something.


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Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 7

  • Yes, that's one of the few quotes that can be applied to anything, no matter the circumstance.

    A woman may preach one thing, but in all reality she may do another.

    Instead of listening and relying on peoples words, you should also look at their doings.

    That is what tells you who they really are.

    And remember, I wouldn't say "all" or "most" because there's a great majority of women you have not yet met.

  • Actually, contrary to the popular belief, most women do not settle for bs in a relationship. I don't know why people think us girls love the jerks because the majority of us don't.

    Now of course that doesn't mean we want a mama's boy who does absolutely nothing wrong. I want an Alpha male who takes charge and leads. But there's a big difference btwn a jerk and an Alpha male.

    • I always thought women mistake cockiness for confidence. That was the best explanation people gave me!

    • Confidence can be hot but there is a fine line between confidence and being arrogant (ie overly cocky) -- they are appealing because they seem to know what they want and we lie because we can see how up them selves they are but they still have sex appeal and we don't understand why we are attracted to them.

      To be quite honest, trying to understand girls is a huge waste of time...we don't even know what we want most of the time LOL!

    • You are really wise, I think. You have good answers!

      Haha no joke? A girl broke up with me and said she didn't know why she was doing it (happened today).

      Friend request me?

  • I think it's a bit of an urban myth that women always fall for the "bad guys". Mostly this gets too polarised, as if there are only "nice guys" and "jerks" in the world - the majority of men are neither. The happy (and I think most successful) medium is the assertive man - who is neither overly concerned with pleasing others, nor does he resort to being mean, underhanded or abusive. These types of guys are usually popular with the ladies since they have the confidence to get their needs met directly without hurting others.

    There are girls who get hung up on "jerks" at times of course. I'm sure this occurs just as much among men, it's just not as obvious since men tend to do the pursuing. For example, I've known it happen many a time among men I know that they completely ignore more compatible (if plainer) women in their environment in order to chase after meaner, more conceited women who were gifted with good looks. He hasn't rejected the other women overtly, but he has done so implicitly.

  • Of course actions speak louder than words.

    With a guy, he can say things, say how much he loves me but how can I tell he really means it? I mean it's the way a guy looks at you, the way he acts around you, the way he seems affected by you. When I think back on guys I used to know, the way that I even touched the side of their face and they seemed so effected by it---- that's what I remember. I don't remember their words.

  • I definitely agree that actions speak louder than words...especially in the dating world. I've been talking to a guy who keeps saying "i miss talking to you, we need to chill sometime" But then when we see each other in the hall I'll smile but he doesn't even look at me, or I'll text him first then thing oh I think I'm bothering him I'll wait for him to text me first...and we could go three weeks without talking. its ridiculous

  • There is an explanation for the ''bad boy'' syndrome.

    It's known as give, withdraw and repeat. Basically what you do is you give something, say your phone number, you plan a date and he cancels at the last minute, then a few days later he calls and apologizes to re-arrange. You go on the date and have a wonderful time he might even kiss you goodbye, then it's a week and no word, then he contacts you again and so on.

    (This goes for both men and women I just wrote he because of the question)

    You see a pattern here?

    Let me simplify it for you.

    If you give a Dolphin a fish it will jump for it, if you put the fish higher the Dolphin will jump higher - get it? Be careful though if you put the fish up to high the dolphin will not jump at all so be careful with this technique also it can in extreme cases get someone to fall very much in love with you so use your powers for good :)!

  • I think there are a lot more men who pretend to be nice to snag a girl than girls who pretend to be nice to snag a guy.


What Guys Said 1

  • I think that actions are far more important than words. I think if you watch what someone does than it will dictate how much you believe what they say. I think that in dating, it's more important than anything. Pay attention to the girls behavior before you make a move and you will have a good start for things to talk about, and you will have a good idea if you would want to date her. There is a lot you can discern from what someone does apart from what they say.


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