I'm just curious, because it just seems like guys hold back a lot
with there feeling. Like there's so many good guys, who are
sweet and will show emotion. But, at the same time, they
try to hide it or say they're not good with that emotion. When
you know very well that they are, so I'm just wondering why
guys do that? Is it, the society we live in and there (so called)
idea of a quote "a real man"? Which I have say is So stupid!
I mean to me, a man, is a man, is a man. Whether he cries, wears
pink or says "how's it going girlfriend (with a finger snap)". To
me all guys are real men, no matter what! That's just my opinion,
but I digress. Or is it the way a guy was raised to handle his
emotions? Is it a personal choice to not be emotional? Or is
it fear of women thinking less of you and maybe risking them
laughing at you if you show emotion? Like what is it?
Most Helpful Guy
It is purely the society we live in as well as the influences of the past societies. To being with, men feel emotions just as women do, period. To say that we lack emotion and can't feel things like sadness, love, hurt, guilt, etc the way women do is bs, we are fully capable o experiencing all those emotions fully and more. However, because of societal pressures and standards over many many many decades, men have been taught to suppress and hide their emotions. Much of this is driven by the notion that if a man shares his feelings and emitions, he will be seen as if he is female because women are the sex known to be open about their feelings. Such a man is also seen as weak because if a man can't control his emotions and suck it up, he is not a man. We're also taught to hide hurt and pain with regards to women; if a girl dumps us or rejects us we are to stifle the pain we feel, puff ourselves up, and say screw her, where's the next girl. Such are the "standards" and pressures that society puts on men. The fact that it's complete bs doesn't erase the fact of decades of such expectations of men by society. Thus on average, men either deliberately choose not express their feelings, or theirs simply afraid to and don't know how. The sad fact is, a true real man is in tune with emotions, recognizes their value and what they're trying to tell him and in doing so is free to express them without shame or fear.
On a tangent, women also play a role in a mans inability to open up and share feelings. We've all heard of how women perceive a guy who is sensitive to his emotions as girlie and weak etc. I believe it takes a special kind of girl for a man to truly sit with her and be 100% comfortable in sharing his feelings and opening up, knowing that she isn't going to be judging him. As a musician and someone who kept his emotions bottled up for years, I'm very in tune with my emotions and feelings now, and I have no hesitation in opening myself and expressing how I feel, I almost have to otherwise I feel like I'm internalizing too much. But I will be the first to say that it takes a lot on the girls part to show me that she is someone I can trust, someone I can talk to and be myself with wholeheartedly, someone who will not only listen to how I'm feeling but also give me feedback, encourage me, challenge me, etc. I'm a phenomenal listener too by the way :) I hope this answers your question!1