How do I know if he's serious or if he's playing me?

I've been seeing this guy for the past month or so and would talk non stop throughout the day. We've gone out a few times and he seems very into me but we're not official or anything. I know he's seeing other women even though he says he's not. I told him that I'm not comfortable seeing him while he's seeing others. He also keeps asking me to have patience while he figures out what he wants. The past week or so he's been texting/calling a lot less and when we talk on the phone its for a few min, he says he'll call me right back and I don't hear from him for hours or until the next day.

He's always telling me that we have a lot of potential and that I'm the kind of person he's been looking for. If this is the case then why see others? Should I not say anything about how we talk a lot less and just give him space to figure things out? I really like this guy and want to try to make this work. Any advice would be great. Thanks


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Because we guys look often at what else is available, before choosing. You'll never know for sure, but you can hope he goes for you, just keep shopping for another guy. We guys need some time to compute the information and rationalize our decisions. Also, he has told you "we have potential" meaning your in my favorite channel list. We need time to screen for unwanted information before sticking to a T.V channel. Who knows what else might show up next.

    So you know, feeling arousal for other women isn't cheating, but acting on the arousal is...remember that.

    Just keep the connection alive. It's the best you can do. The ball is on his court.

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    • Keep the connection alive how? Whenever I text him he takes hours to respond and never answers calls but thinks something is wrong if I don't answer him right away. What if I do what the other person said below about not contacting him?

    • Your decision at the end, but if you want to keep the connection alive you need to keep answering his text. It shouldn't really matter if he responds immediately or in 2 days. You need to make him feel like you are there for him.

      For a girl I really like I'd rather be an option than a friend. Think about it

      He's playing you bla, bla ,bla. Look If a girl was looking at other guys and I had interest in her. I'd make my interest clear and let her decide. Yes it's stressful, but it's dating.

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What Guys Said 0

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What Girls Said 2

  • hes playing you. he's keeping you as an option while he talks to other girls and decides who he wants to be with. I would stop talking/texting him and see if he makes the effort to contact you first. don't act like you're into him too much. guys like the chase. he knows that you're into him and that if things don't work out with the other girls he can come to you. make it seem like you're a hot commodity. it'll work.

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  • First wrong move: you told him you are not comfortable with him seeing others. Always act brave an independent, hide your emotions. Give men the impression that you DO NOT Need them. I think he is playing with your head, in the mean time start seeing other people or do something fun like table tennis or whatever it is that you do for fun. act as if you don't care and you will see a difference and whatever you do do not have sex with him

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