Why am I not worth any women's time?

As I sit here staring at my 9mm pistol in my hand I'm very carefully considering my last moments. I've enjoyed living for the most part but there some things that I'm just apparently not cut out for. One of those being ever having any companionship of any sort. I am 23 years old and a college graduate. Never once in my life has a girl said anything nice to me. While all my friends are falling in love and having relationships in their 20s I'm stuck being that debilitatingly socially awkward guy. I've turned to the use of psychedelic drugs to help me cope with these short comings I appear to have for a 23 year old. LSD has shown me a world beyond my full comprehension and I've thoroughly enjoyed every time I've taken it (too many times to count). Marijuana magic, mushrooms and mdma have all opened up a new way of thinking. I have done none of these in moderation. I seek to escape the sorry chains of my pathetic reality and attempt to find some joy in the world of psychedelics. I'm not sure what it is about me but I don't seem to attract the affections of women like everyone around me claims to. Its as easy for them to walk into a room and have every women there swoon at their presence. Me on the other hand when I walk into a room all I get is stares like everyone's asking me "Why are you even in my presence?" There is no comfort in the kind words from my family either. I know they're genuine in their want to see me happy but they are the only one's who have every complemented me on my looks and my potential. Now you're probably reading this thinking that this guy is pathetic. He probably should splatter his brains all over his bedroom wall. 23 and still a virgin? What a ******* loser. He's already committed social suicide by never having a girlfriend why doesn't he do the world a favor and commit actual suicide. I'm just trying to understand what makes me so different from everyone else. I'm quite shy and that obviously works against me. I see no way out of this predicament that I've created for myself except for maybe in a body bag.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Why am I not worth any women's time?

    Probably you are worth some gals' time you're just not interested in those gals and haven't even acknowledged them. Though in my opinion it's best suited not to concern yourself if you're worth a person's time and find worth in just being you.

    "Never once in my life has a girl said anything nice to me"

    Perhaps it's suited to for you to say nice things about yourself as gals aren't obligated to say nice things to you and despite what guys are often told by the media and society often tells gals don't exist to boost a guy's self-esteem/worth/confidence or ego. However if you're stuck on a gal saying something nice to you there are prostitutes/escorts you can pay to say whatever you want to you.

    " I'm stuck being that debilitatingly socially awkward guy."

    " I'm quite shy and that obviously works against me."

    Perhaps try some public speaking courses, socializing more, and learning body language and facial expressions.

    "As I sit here staring at my 9mm pistol in my hand I'm very carefully considering my last moments. "

    Offnote: Does that consideration involve videotaping it?

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What Girls Said 11

  • well for one, I know that if I were you I would stop using drugs. life can be very cruel and horrible, but using drugs is a poor way to deal with it. if I were in your shoes I would maybe move to a new place or try to find love through a site like eharmony or something. if I was a single and virgin 23 year old woman, I might feel ugly and depressed, but because I know that life is not always about love, I would find it along the way by doing something I love, like exploring the world as a biologist, which I plan to do. we all have insecurities and people who make them feel even worse, but think about who you surround yourself with. are they REALLY your friends? do you surround yourself or find yourself constantly exposed to people who don't seem to like you? then get away from them! go find someone new to be around! feel good about yourself, you graduated college! that's impressive to me! you care about your knowledge and obviously you should go put it to use!

    as for feeling left out and unattractive goes, you are NOT alone! but do not just give up like that, you are still young and have a lot of life yet to live! a gun is not going to bring you any peace of mind, and god certainly wouldn't like that idea either!

    to me, looks do not matter. when you love someone, you BECOME more beautiful or handsome. I have seen this happen all the time, its real. you love someone because of who they ARE, and I am sure there is a girl who is out there wondering the same things you are. go find her! she is feeling just as depressed and thinking about her gun too, save her before it is too late! stop leaning on drugs, they don't bring you happiness, they are not loving like a woman, they are DEFINITELY NOT attractive to any other girl out there either. maybe girls can smell the drugs in your clothes and around you, and that's why they cringe.

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  • If you find yourself considering suicide, the first thing you need to do is seek professional help. Please call one of these hotlines:

    National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255

    National Suicide Hotline: 1-800-784-2433

    Or visit one of the following websites:

    link

    link

    link

    I can't answer your questions about why you are in the situation you're in. But I can remind you that as long as you're alive, there is the potential for your life to get better. There is no sense in wasting that chance. So seek help, even though it is difficult to do.

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  • A relationship does not validate your existence. Typically people who think that are the ones who stay in abusive or unhappy relationships.

    I'm into psychedelics too. It definitely opens the mind to new perspectives and you will probably be better off with someone who thinks that way too. Some girls will get turned off by that if they don't understand the world of psychedelics.

    Did you ever approach the girls you're interested in? You have to put in effort and appear confident. Even if you have to fake that you're confident. And looks doesn't get you a true relationship because I see so many happy couples from hideous to hot. It only gets people to lust you, but that doesn't mean they want to know the real you.

    I'm 22 and never once had a "normal" relationship. I had a 4 year long distance relationship, a 4 week long distance relationship, and a 4 week in the same town relationship. Both guys except for the 4 year long relationship turned out to be selfish emotionally abusive losers. I tend to choose the wrong guys so I won't date at all for a while. The guys who want me I'm not attracted to or they just want sex. I know what I want but I haven't come across the right person and understand how frustrating it is to feel alone. You feel like you'd rather be dead than to see other people happily together, but let me tell you something. You really don't know what the other side is. There is no evidence. Sure people have say they contact the dead or have seen the other side, but no one can really prove or show you what they've seen.

    So even if you do decide to take your life, you could end up being more alone than you already are (I'm sure you've heard limbo stories), the suicide attempt fails and turn yourself into a vegetable, etc. That's like being stuck in a bad trip for almost eternity. Please remember how precious life is because once it's gone there's no coming back.

    There are a lot of beautiful things to experience especially when traveling. Think of all the things you want to do or always wanted to do

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  • Hmm OK time-out. I've also gone through moments of being suicidal/depressed, it's actually really easy to slip into woe-is-me mode and have a full on pity party, and sometimes it feels nice to feel sorry for yourself instead of actually dealing withyour issues. I'm gona try be as practical as possible... Life really is what you make it. You need to differentiate between what you can control and what you can't. You can't control whether or not someone limes you. You can control your outlook on life. You can control what you spend your free time on, things you're passionate about. You never listed the positives in your life, things that make you happy or awesome, and trust me they exist. Focus on fixing yourself first before wanting to start a relationship. Figure out who you are and what you want. People will like you more if you seem at ease with yourself. Why do you want a girlfriend? Is it for sex or societal pressure? Or is it a form of validation of your worth? I used to date guys and have all these toxic relationships just because I wanted validation that I was hot enough or worthy of love. I realized that even in these relationships I was dissatisfied. I'm all for recreational drug use, as long as it's not used as a coping mechanism (because that's how addictions start). I could go on forever. Inbox me if you want :-)

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  • Also, stick to mushrooms, not lsd not marijuana, they can make you feel more depressed.

    Go for walks if you can of hikes if near hills.

    Don't do it for yourself, your mom and dad, or who is kind to you. You will be a success when your older, you will see. til then life can be a struggle. I struggle. Good luck! ok! also eat healthy, that alone can be giving you depressed feelings. Take care of yourself, and don't hurt the ones who have taken care of you.

    Sometimes, I just want to live to see what happens in this world. Just for curiosity.

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  • Come on dude, I'm 25 and I'm still single, had one relationship who treated me like sh*t and left me to carry a scare for all my life. So, trust me when I'm telling you this SUICIDE IS NOT AN OPTION, it sis for cowards which I think your not because if you were you wouldn't have been posting your problem on this site in front of everyone, talk to some one, quit using drugs because you will further ruin yourself, Be the flame not the Moss! :) make friends and may be ul see that may be you werent cut out to fit in may be you were meant to stand out

    ther must be something your good at? right? fig that out Good Luck!

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  • I don't think so really, I've been shy and skinny and nobody ever looked at me so much, But it gets better. You are a late starter! That's all! It's great that you are a virgin, REALLY. Stop hanging out with those kids who has nothing in common with you.

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  • seek help. This site is not best for you here. You need therapy

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  • I think you just need to work on yourself, take time away from dating.

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  • ok one please please please don't kill yourself over just not having a girlfriend. Just go out in public with some friends and meet some people :)

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  • I'm 20. No guy has ever liked me or shown remote interest in me. I'm a virgin. I'm okay with that part of me- I want to wait for the right guy to come along.You're not the only one in your twenties who's a virgin. No girl will truly love you until you can love yourself. Please don't do it. Talk to a professional who can help you. You're so young and you've got so much to live for. As of now you might not have gotten the attention you've wanted, but you're definitely not going to get it if you kill yourself. Please don't do it and seek help.

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What Guys Said 6

  • Okay first off suicide is NEVER an options. No exceptions. You aren't just killing yourself but think of your family and everyone that you have had contact with. It's really is the most selfish act.

    When you are feeling this way, everyone has some type of coping mechanisms. When you feel you are out of solutions to cope you think of thoughts like suicide. There are tools and peoples that can give you coping skills and help answer these sorts of questions.

    You just have to reach out and ask for some assistance. It sounds like you want some answers, don't stop asking. Call your local access and crisis line. They are there to help you with this stuff.

    DON'T WAIT. CALL.

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  • i feel your pain too bro but I've tried exercising and working out to release endorphins and stree in me, and so far it is working

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  • It's because you have so low confidence, and you don't believe in everything positively.

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  • You need to exercise your social muscles dude. Take an improv class try toastmasters or join any coed club. If you avoid social situations how can you be great? People aren't born great talkers, it takes time.

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  • i hate how it's okay for girls to base their self-worth, get their validation on having a boyfriend, a relationship, being able to attract guys, but not the other way around

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  • Everyone feels like that man your not alone there are lots of people just like you. Life is a struggle for EVERYONE most just don't show it. Suicide is never the answer...think of your family they would devastated..you can get over being socially awkward and shy and the part about getting stares from people when you walk into a room is all in your head listen to some uplighting music exercise to help improve your self esteem.

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