As I sit here staring at my 9mm pistol in my hand I'm very carefully considering my last moments. I've enjoyed living for the most part but there some things that I'm just apparently not cut out for. One of those being ever having any companionship of any sort. I am 23 years old and a college graduate. Never once in my life has a girl said anything nice to me. While all my friends are falling in love and having relationships in their 20s I'm stuck being that debilitatingly socially awkward guy. I've turned to the use of psychedelic drugs to help me cope with these short comings I appear to have for a 23 year old. LSD has shown me a world beyond my full comprehension and I've thoroughly enjoyed every time I've taken it (too many times to count). Marijuana magic, mushrooms and mdma have all opened up a new way of thinking. I have done none of these in moderation. I seek to escape the sorry chains of my pathetic reality and attempt to find some joy in the world of psychedelics. I'm not sure what it is about me but I don't seem to attract the affections of women like everyone around me claims to. Its as easy for them to walk into a room and have every women there swoon at their presence. Me on the other hand when I walk into a room all I get is stares like everyone's asking me "Why are you even in my presence?" There is no comfort in the kind words from my family either. I know they're genuine in their want to see me happy but they are the only one's who have every complemented me on my looks and my potential. Now you're probably reading this thinking that this guy is pathetic. He probably should splatter his brains all over his bedroom wall. 23 and still a virgin? What a ******* loser. He's already committed social suicide by never having a girlfriend why doesn't he do the world a favor and commit actual suicide. I'm just trying to understand what makes me so different from everyone else. I'm quite shy and that obviously works against me. I see no way out of this predicament that I've created for myself except for maybe in a body bag.
Most Helpful Girl
Why am I not worth any women's time?
Probably you are worth some gals' time you're just not interested in those gals and haven't even acknowledged them. Though in my opinion it's best suited not to concern yourself if you're worth a person's time and find worth in just being you.
"Never once in my life has a girl said anything nice to me"
Perhaps it's suited to for you to say nice things about yourself as gals aren't obligated to say nice things to you and despite what guys are often told by the media and society often tells gals don't exist to boost a guy's self-esteem/worth/confidence or ego. However if you're stuck on a gal saying something nice to you there are prostitutes/escorts you can pay to say whatever you want to you.
" I'm stuck being that debilitatingly socially awkward guy."
" I'm quite shy and that obviously works against me."
Perhaps try some public speaking courses, socializing more, and learning body language and facial expressions.
"As I sit here staring at my 9mm pistol in my hand I'm very carefully considering my last moments. "
Offnote: Does that consideration involve videotaping it?1