I've been suicidal since I was 11. When I was 12 I mapped out my suicide, wrote my note, and I was ready. I didn't succeed. This year has gotten worse. I drop hints by my mom that I truly do need help, but she keeps denying that I need help. I've even asked her for advice and she says that "everything is just all in my head" and that "you let yourself feel that way" and that everything is my fault. I just feel so trapped. I've even joked about leaving with my friends. They just think I'm kidding. I've lost countless friends in the past year. I've developed an eating disorder also. I told my mom and dad that I'm having eating problems, and they just let it pass by, as if I'm just in a phase. When I go to lunch everyday I only pack like a small sandwich and drink water. Sometimes I just drink water for lunch. My friends have noticed it, and they joke about me being anorexic, but they just have no clue. I told one of my closest friends that I think I have an eating disorder, and you know what she said "no you don't, you're fine" Every single person in my life just ignores the obvious problems that I'm having. If I tell my parents I need therapy then they'll take me out of school, call me crazy, and tell my that I'm wasting their money. I don't know what to do. I cry way to much by myself and I always have frequent panic attacks. I feel so empty.