What should I do? And please, no 60+ or judgmental people?

There is someone (my father) who has been subjecting me to fear and intimidation for a long time. I have recorded the incidences in my phone and I have seen a psychologist who has told me that my anxiety disorder was caused by this person. I have been to a police station and the police have left the choice up to me: to persue charges or not.
I don't want to wreck things and cause trouble because it is a big step to launch legal action. I have tried many times to bring a peaceful resolution but all this person has done is poke fun of me and twist the truth to make out I am the aggressor and they're the victim.
The police believe my side of events as there is an independent person (psychologist) who verifies my account.

Thing is my brother is a police man and I don't want to make things hard on him and on other people.
What should I do? Should I proceed with police action? Any advice?
I am planning to get away from this person (my father) but my finances prevent this at the present moment.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Please press chargers, my father is abusive and sometimes you have to remove those people from your life like they are a tumor. You need to think of yourself in this situation, if he has done something bad enough for charges then you need to press them. My brother can also be abusive at times. And one time he got me on the ground and was beating and kicking me.. but i begged my mom not to call the police because having a record could ruin his life. It was a big mistake and since then things have gotten much worse and i dont even know who he is anymore. You need to think about your feelings, and your physical and mental wellbeing. It is in NO way selfish, please dont make the same mistake i did

    • I just don't want to make things harder on myself as well. He could then throw me out of the house. I have evidence though. All I want is for this to stop.

    • You probably need to get out of the environment anyway, my suggestion is press charges and he will get arrested so he can't kick you out, and in the mean time try to find a place to stay and get on your feet. Maybe check into a restraining order as well. I know its hard but its worth doing

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What Girls Said 2

  • Move asap. To ur brothers or friends... "Should I proceed with police action?" only if he's threat to other people. It sure won't help you with your anxiety disorder. Good luck.

  • Generally, I would advice to follow through with police action. Whilst it speaks for you that you're trying to be considerate of others (your brother), I believe you shouldn't let these things play a role in your decision.

    The one issue I see is that you live with your father. If you pursue this, living with your father will turn into a bigger nightmare than it already is. He could throw you out of the house, or he could make your life even harder. How long do you think it will take to be able to move out? Are we talking about months or years? Could you not live with a friend whilst you sort your finances out? If I were you, I don't think I'd proceed with police action if I couldn't move out of my father's house, but would definitely do so once I'm out of there.


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