Can you understand people who commit suicide?

Can you understand it? What are some reasons behind it? Ever helped someone who wanted to commit suicide?


Most Helpful Guy

  • Yes, I can understand it very well. It was also quite interesting to read the other comments. For example @BreatheMe said that she will always look at it as a sign of weakness. This is interesting because I believe the notion of suicide also depends a lot on the culture you were born into. In the majority of the western world, seeing suicide as weakness is the "normal" way of looking at it. But in Japan for example, suicide is considered an act of bravery and honor. Rather than considering somebody who commits suicide as selfish, Japanese people tend to admire him/her for his/her determination and willpower and, in some cases, his/her attempt to save other people (family, friends etc.) from shame.

    Personally, I come from Switzerland, which is one of only two countries in the world (besides Belgium) where assisted suicide is legal. So we actually have institutions that you can contact if you don't want to live anymore. Of course you can't just die like that. They will go with you through extensive psychological checks and talks but if it turns out in the end that this is not just some temporary feeling that will pass after a few weeks but that you really, sincerely want to stop living, they will help you kill yourself by giving you a poison you can drink that will kill you quickly and without pain (in the end however, you always have to drink it yourself, they're not allowed to pour it into your mouth). Many people who for example have cancer and know that their last few months of their lives will be incredibly painful and torturing decide to instead contact these institutions. Due to the legal situation, there are also quite a lot of foreigners coming to Switzerland to do this, which our media calls "suicide-tourists" (it sounds a little harsh but that's what it is, basically).

    I have a very liberal view towards suicide. I believe that our lives belong to nobody else than ourselves. My life doesn't belong to my family, nor my friends, nor the government. Hence, I should be the only person to have a say whether I want to quit it or not. Also, I don't judge anyone who does it. Some people say "just because you xy happened, that's not a reason to commit suicide!" but what they don't understand is that this kind of things work differently for everyone. You can't judge what's bad for your best friend simply because you don't find it so bad. Somebody might be addicted to drugs and want to kill himself. Someone else might lose his whole family and still

    • continue living without ever even considering suicide. This doesn't mean that people who are more sensitive are automatically mentally sick. It just means their hearts and minds work differently. Because of this, I find it extremely unfair to judge people who commit suicide. I am convinced that each and every one of us knows the best what's good for ourselves and what isn't. We don't need people to tell us "come on, it's not so bad, try a new start in life". In fact, I find this attitude from other people rather arrogant.

      Personally, I would help somebody kill themselves (as in give advice etc.) if he/she explicitly asked for it. I don't see anything bad in it. If I don't give the advice, someone else will (perhaps the internet). And if somebody wants to commit suicide, I respect this as their mature decision and want to help them go peacefully and without pain.
      I also once prevented a suicide at a train station but that was because that person was mentally handicapped and confused.

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    • important to not be a burden to anyone. That is also why Japanese people are so overtly-polite. They are so afraid of intruding anyone's space or being a burden to anyone. At the same time, the act of "losing your face" is the absolutely WORST thing that could ever happen to an east Asian person (this is also true for Korean, Chinese and Taiwanese). It is much worse than being called any name or anything we westerners could think of. Naturally, the worst ways of losing your face is when it happens on a public scale. For example a few months ago, I read the newspaper about the CEO of a company who did some big mistake and his company lost a lot of money because of that. The fact that he had to publicly apologize countless times and the fact that everyone talked about it was extremely shameful and one of the worst nightmares for any Asian person. A few days later, he committed suicide. Upon that, his family said to the media that they were proud of him to have done this because with his

    • huge mistake, he also brought shame upon his family and by punishing himself for it and showing his bravery to actually let go of the most precious thing he had (his life), he made up for the fact that he put this huge burden of shame on his family members' shoulders.
      It might sound strange to you but I just meant to say that there are culturally very different ways of looking at suicide and I don't think one is necessarily better than the other.

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What Girls Said 4

  • I can understand it. There's no guarantee of anything in this life getting better, even if people say it will. It can go from bad to worse. When you're ready to commit suicide, it feels like the worst point in your life, but there's still the knowledge that it can always get worse. And sure, it can get better, but why take that risk?

    Suicide is often an expression of someone feeling extremely out of control. It is them finally finding something that they can take control of and exercising that, because at least suicide is a choice that they can make and usually no one else can change their choice. It's all theirs and that slight feeling of control is something that they desperately need at that point so they take it.

    I've never helped someone commit suicide, though I've been there to stop people.

    • Yeah i meant it like stop someone from doing it=helped the person;)

      Seems like you think a lot about that topic. What can be some examples for reasons to do it? Does the person always have to lose something or grow up in a miserable life or could it be that he just can't find the sense in living even when it is a good/normal life?

      Why take the risk that it can get better? Because u die anyways so why shouldn't you take the risk?

    • You don't necessarily have had to have a bad upbringing or lose something to want to commit suicide. You could be depressed and depression isn't always based on what state your life is in. Depression can sometimes just be purely biological, it can be an excess of dopamine at the synapse in your pre-frontal cortex (there's obviously research that argues a different approach, and says that social factors are a trigger for depression, so social reasons can then cause the excess dopamine), and if that happens, then no matter how amazing your life is, until that dopamine gets sorted out, you are not going to be happy, because you physically can't.

      You do die anyway, but if we consider that suicide is most common in teenagers (let's say 16) and the average age for death is 71, that's 55 years of nothing getting better, of constantly feeling useless, scared, weak, and a sadness so profound it physically hurts. Why would they want to live like that? That's not a real life anyway.

    • Yeah but I never understand why they don't do some risky fun stuff you normally couldn't do when u are afraid of dying. Maybe they are afraid of pain but they are actually freed from the chains of life even when they are still living

  • I would say so, the mental lives of suicidal people are considerably different than the cognition of someone mentally healthy.

  • I understand the feeling of wanting to commit suicide. That utter helplessness. It's kind of like feeling trapped and you just want a way out.

    But, actually commiting is not something I understand. Most of the times things do change if you actually try and put the effort in. Sometimes that's hard to believe, which I understand all too well but, suicide will always be seen as a sign of weakness to me.

    I never have. But I would in a heartbeat.

    • Maybe you weren't that deep in in that feeling. I believe that you can reach a point were you can't get out without help. I read that more guys commit suicide but many teen girls try it but fail to do it.. Do you think that they want to be saved? Like more than the guys because the guys succeed more in killing themselves

    • Eh I'm not so sure about that. And I believe that too. Part of making an effort to make things better is asking for help. There are people out there who can help.
      I'm not sure why it's like that. I've never really did much research into suicide.

    • Me neither. I just read today that about 2/3 are guys

  • Yes and no
    I have been depressed before, thinking there was no way out. But I just kept on going hoping for it to change, and it did!
    Not everyone keeps hoping or has someone to talk too though...

    What I DON'T understand though, is people commiting suicide, killing other people in the process

    And yes I helped someone before

    • So depression is always something you have before u commit suicide or are there also other reasons? What were the reasons for your depression? Or is that too personal?

      How did you helped the person?

    • I don't think depression is always the cause. I just spoke from my own experiences
      And too personal ya :p

      And by talking, talking, and more talking

    • People who are down need someone who they can trust to let out what's on their mind, instead of letting it stack up

What Guys Said 1

  • Yes, I can. It's viewed as an easy way out, a selfish decision. Attempted suicide myself some 7 years ago. Would never help anyone kill themselves or give "advice" on how to.

    • What was your reason?
      Sorry I meant it the other way around like helping someone not to do it

    • Life of crime and drug abuse.