20 and feeling old? Help?

My life is boring, I have nothing, I live far away from my family, never been in a relationship, have no academic qualifications since my high school diploma (I’ve been failing college), I almost never go out, all my friends go to different colleges so I barely get to see them, I'm always home. In short I'm feeling old and boring, I miss my 16-19 years... I was on the top (quite popular, good grades, had fun) and in one year everything fell down….
I'm in my 20's it's the time to be pretty and have fun, but I'm just here, my time is running out, and I have a boring life...

What’s the solution? :(


Most Helpful Guy

  • You still have your entire life ahead of you, and things can change FAST. Just like how you were one top of the world and fell from grace in one year, a little bit of motivation and goals can put you right back on top.

    You feel old because you feel like your life has already peaked and now there is nothing to do but spiral down into despair. I was feeling the same thing at your age. I was failing out of college, never went out, never had a relationship, etc. I just decided one day to make steps to change that. I studied harder in college, tried to make some friends to go out with, and just change in general. It's been 5 years and things aren't exactly as perfect as I envisioned them, but I feel so much better and even at 25 I feel like I have so much more to look forward to in life.

    I guess I'm just saying things can change for the better fast. Hell, next week something can change and you may have an entirely new outlook on life. Just hold on and try to look for the positives because your life hasn't even really started yet.


Most Helpful Girl

  • You're only 20. You can totally fix things :)

    Step 1: Fix your grades. Talk to your professors and do what you can.
    Step 2: Prioritize your education. maybe this means moving closer to home and going to a different university or witching over to a community college.
    Step 3: Find a therapist and discuss depression. Student Health covers and provides these services. Make the most of them.
    Step 4: Make a plan of things you can look forward to. Set up daily, weekly, and goals based on the term. These can be things like going to class, eating a good meal, or even a piece of candy at the end of the day! Little victories can slowly add up to bigger victories!


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 4

What Girls Said 1

  • ok, you get to switch bodies and lives with some other girl your age. quick!, you get 5 seconds to pick one. who'd you pick? why?

    • I would just pick a better me I guess :/

    • Ok, well, I like that answer and I don't like that answer.

      I like that answer because you don't hate yourself.

      I don't like that answer because it's a non-answer. You don't have concrete goals.

      It's easy enough to complain that things are bad, but you have to CONCRETELY DEFINE what it means for them to get better. What are your goals? "In 6 months I'd like to be doing [_____]" "In 1 year I'd like to be doing [______]"
      You should fill in the blanks with things that are CONCRETE. They should be concrete enough that a third party could be able to say yes, this is happening or no, this isn't happening.

      This is the biggest reason people don't improve-- because they don't define improvement in the first place.

      E. g.
      "I'll get better about not losing things"
      Bullshit, non-goal, doesn't mean anything. No one can tell if you're doing this, not even you.

      "At home I'll put my wallet in place X, keys in place Y, etc. When I wear clothes I'll put them in place Z, etc."
      Aha! Concrete goals.