How do you be more confident?

I am friends with a guy I haven't talked to in over 7 months. We're starting over. We had a very rocky friendship (arguements, insults, breaks) and I'm trying now to move past that. I met him 2 years ago and honestly, my self- esteem has never been lower. Even now starting over, all the old and negative feelings have come back, and it's nothing he's done--yet. We did have fun together, and he's a cool guy, I'm honestly not sure what's wrong. How do I work on my confidence, to not feel so low and anxious?


Most Helpful Guy

  • Figure out the things about yourself that make you feel insecure or not confident. Work towards fixing them if you can and work towards accepting them if you can't. Some things are easy to fix and some things take longer, but if you don't love yourself at the beginning of your journey to fix them then I can guarantee you won't be successful in changing those negative attributes.

    Remember that you can't love anyone else and no one else can truly love you until you love yourself.


Most Helpful Girl

  • I recommend going on YouTube and typing in, "how do be confident" and watching a bunch of people explain their perspectives on how to be confident. One of them is bound to intrigue your interest! :)
    But personally the way I'm confident is I wear clothes that make me feel good, small heels on my boots, I smile a lot, a little foundation, laugh, and most of all be kind to everyone.
    Take care of your health; eat good foods. Get involved in sports or the gym; get involved with different programs and communities.
    Find a goal and stick to it (eg: I wanna get straight A's this semester).
    Look at yourself in the mirror and notice every feature you have and see how beautiful you are.
    Smiling is the best curve you can wear. :)
    Buy a new outfit; try a different hair style.


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • There's confidence of the kind where you have a positive outlook on yourself, and sometimes you can help that just by focusing on fashion, fitness, posture, things of this sort, just making you walk taller and feeling attractive and desirable and getting control over situations that way.

    But to make things happen, you can end up doing extremely bold and confident things even if your outlook of yourself isn't the most positive, and that can come from an apathetic mindset.

    People get afraid to make moves when they're worried about negative and positive outcomes: building too much hope for positive outcomes, and being too afraid of the negative ones. For me it always helped to kind of develop a "whatever" mindset. "Whatever, I'll just go right up and kiss her. Whatever, I'll grab her hand now." The idea is to kind of detach yourself and not become too emotionally invested in the outcome, good or bad. It makes everything easier that would otherwise require tremendous courage to do.


What Girls Said 1

  • Just dress nice and stand tall!