Just need to rant?

This might be a long post, but whatever, I just need a space to rant a little for now.

So here's this.. I'm 18 this year (well not yet 18, will be next week), and recently (last month, like three weeks ago) just moved over to Australia to live with my dad.. [my parents were divorced fyi, and my dad never came back to visit.. up until I was diagnosed with leukemia…], I still keep in contact with my mum whose back in the country.

Now, I've been to Aussie for three times (incl this time), one year once starting from 2014, and my dad has this Korean lady whom he said is a friend. I've never bothered much, tho sometimes her actions seems to be that of more than a friend's. She's been nice to me the first two times I've visited. *fast forward to 2016, now* I'm living in her house (wth?). First two weeks or so, it was good. Everything was good. Then, on Sunday night I had to do my homework (also, it was the eve of the Chinese New Year, I've already felt sad for not being able to go back and now there's this shit coming up), so after dinner, when she asked me to cleaned the fridge, I was kinda frustrated (my bad, I know).. I took the clothe to wipe then the tissue paper to wipe again. NOW HERE'S THE THING! She suddenly got mad and explode and chase me into the room. (fuck it -.- she acts like my mum when in fact she isn't!) My dad did nothing! NOTHING!! So literally, she's been trying to explain to me stuffs and shit and making me sound like I made everyone's life miserable, till the extend I even feel like ending my life. She said that I'm an adult now yet she says that I have to obey her rules blabla, that I should respect my dad, call him daddy etc. I can't call him daddy, how do you expect me to call him that when it's been 17 years that I've never did that?

So yeah, technically, she made me cried for three days already, and my dad never did anything. I told my dad to tell her to stop interfering in my life because she isn't my mum and that she shouldn't act like it! And she told me off today.
She says that divorce isn't a big deal - yeah I know it isn't, but have you imagined life in school without a dad? Open day, sports day.. etc where everyone's parents are there but mine isn't. According to her, many people divorce when the love isn't there anymore and I shouldn't take marriage so seriously, "divorce is normal" - according to her.


Most Helpful Guy

  • My parents divorced when I was very young (6 years old) and it was tough and I had to get used to step-family.

    But my father's side wasn't so bad. I didn't get along with them always, but there's a childhood kind of difficulty there of wanting to repress people who aren't actually your real mother or father.

    My mother's side was a disaster. She ended up re-marrying a guy who ended up leaving her and stealing her car on the way as well as my most-prized baseball card, a $2,000 Mickey Mantle autographed rookie card that I ended up getting for free when I was a kid.

    She dated the most awful guys imaginable, and I had to try to put up with it.

    Mostly it's worth noting that your parents are just human beings. They're not immortal, they're not perfect, it's hard to kind of look at them as ordinary people when they brought you up and raised you, but they won't always choose the best.

    As for Korean women, they tend to be very odd with the way they look at relationships to Western eyes, can be the boss of the household, etc.

    That said, since you're stuck with her until you can become independent and live on your own, I'd just suggest trying to do your best and build a firm resolve, be as independent as you can be in that situation but also try to be as easy to get along with as possible. It'll just make your life so much easier if you aren't making enemies with the people you're living with, as hard as it can be.

    • The deadbeat who stole my mother's car and baseball card was just awful. I tried to get along with him but he treated my sister and I so poorly, and made my sister cry all the time. My mother had to divorce him in isolation, and we had to show up in court, since the police were still looking for him with the stolen car and tags over a year later. So it might help to know that there are worse situations out there.

    • Another thing about that guy who married my mother (going into my own rant) was that he watched porno really loudly at night, my sister and I could hear the television downstairs and were too afraid to even go down to get a glass of water. I was just 9 years old at the time, sister was 6.

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What Guys Said 2

  • i understand it a big change in you like and probably having a hard time adjusting to everything that has happened. what i'm about to say might sound like im against you but dont take it that way please. its just to help you open your eyes.
    the changes are just to you but to your dad and his friend also. this is all new to them just like it is to you. they are leaning how to be parents. but the problem is they dont think you respect them for what they are trying to do. also every house has rules and well you live there you have to follow them, even if you dont think its fair.
    how do you feel if a friend comes in your room and tries to make changes or disrespect you well in there. you would want to throw them out, right. thats how they feel in the house
    to get respect you have to first give it.

  • /rant



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