My wife works as a manager at a law firm. They recently had an overnight partner meeting at a nearby costal town. She was invited to attend. They had meetings along with a night out which involved everyone cutting loose and having a good time. She came back and said it was a lot of fun.
The following Monday she had two separate partners with the law firm approach her and state that one of the partners thinks she is totally "f**kable" . She told them that that made her feel uncomfortable. She stated to me she didn’t think it was a big deal. When I heard this I saw red! I am feeling very territorial as it seems to me that they were trolling for their buddy. My wife believes she should be able to handle it on her own. Am I over reacting by wanting to call these partner and tell them this is not acceptable behavior or do I just let it go?
Most Helpful Girl
It depends on how long it goes on.
She needs to clarify with them that their behavior is unacceptable, and you need to support that vs. going on top of her and doing something which may damage her work relationship. DON'T be that guy who ends up ruining her job.
BUT, if it continues, you need to let her know it's not okay and that she needs to put a stop to it by reporting it to HR. She might not think it's a big deal, but if it bothers you and she truly loves you, she will stop it out of respect for you.
At the end of the day, SHE needs to be the one to control the situation and you need to be the one that supports her in controlling it; not going over her to do something.
Your reaction is normal so I don't think you are overreacting as far as your feelings, but if your wife says she will handle it, let her know you trust her to do so.1
Most Helpful Guy
Let it go and let her handle it. It might be bad for her reputation if you go over her head and talk to them.1