What causes people to threaten suicide as a way to stop divorce or a break up?

A little back story.
i work remote site work and work with the same group of people 2-3 weeks 12 hours a day no days off.
We land back to civilization and at the airport bar a co-worker I've made friends with opened up to me.
He proceeds to tell me how he's wife can't have kids and they've been trying for years then he gets quiet and speaks about how her ex boss kept buying her gifts and compliments and over 3 years of doing in this his wife and her boss had an affair. A few years after it was over he found out through text messages and old fb texts that didn't get deleted.
He kicked her out but her elderly dad came by and begged him to take her back (he said seeing a 70 year old guy beg almost broke his heart). He let her move back in but Told how could she be so stupid what if he got her pregnant (they were going through IVF treatments at the time) that he forgave her but would not accept what she did and he was divorcing her. He told me how he she broke down wouldn't eat had to take her to the hospital because she refused to eat and had a mental breakdown. How when she came back home she would apologize profusely and he would leave (to go get shit faced only way he could with it) he would come back home and she'd be a mess and he'd have to wrestle a knife away from her to keep her from self harming.

I asked him him if he was scared she's hurt him and he said he was more scared she's hurt herself. That she is a completely different person (after the affair was discovered) their marriage is on life support he's no longer the loving husband he was and no longer shows her blind love and affection, they've been together for so long he is also afraid to be alone. But he is also afraid what she may do to herself if he actually went through with the divorce.

why would she (or people in general) threaten self harm/suicide as a way to stop divorceing or a break up?

i mean a "mental breakdown" does that actually happen or is he being manipulated?


Most Helpful Girl

  • She thinks the only way to get him to stick around is if she threatens to kill herself if he leaves. She's mentally unstable and using emotional blackmail to manipulate the guy into staying with her.


Most Helpful Guy

  • It's their own weakness getting in the way. I'm not going to be polite about this.
    When shit pushes you down, there's no way like giving up than by killing yourself.
    This is the ultimate way of giving up there's nothing more to it than that.
    It's people that commit suicide that refuse to accept reality for what it is/or what has become. Weakness and ignorance IN MY OPINION... that leads to suicide. They didn't have the strength to lift themselves up, and was ignorant to think there was no way out.

    • It's depressing because she's taking him down with her. Her own selfish mistake he could move on find some one else have a kid and have a good life. But her suicide threat and "break down" has stopped him. I've seen a picture she is gorgeous and he is built both of them could have found love easily. But she won't let him in my opinion

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What Girls Said 0

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What Guys Said 3

  • One word; desperation

  • Probably because it does feel as though you are on the brink

  • Desperation.