How do I keep eye contact with a woman?

When i first see a girl the first thing i look at is her chest
Not on purpose it automatically happens
Then i look up at their eyes
(Its a quick thing though i dont look at them for 10 seconds then look back up
I wouldn't be surprised if they didn't notice it)

If they're showing cleavage i look back down to check it out again not on purpose

IT doesn't really matter what age i mean
As long as they have breast and show cleavage i can't... My brain is like wired to look at the chest

Then when they look away i look back down and most of the time the look back at me and catch me..

I think it has to do with the fact I've never seen boobs in person before

But can you just tell me how to keep eye contact?


Most Helpful Girl

  • So... I don't think the *looking* is the problem. I'd say the problem is how you're acting when you get "caught".
    In fact, even using the word "caught" is indicative of what the real problem is here.

    As the guy in these situations, you have a surprisingly strong ability to set the vibe of the interaction -- IF you actually take advantage of it.

    *Most* girls are "vibe followers", not really "vibe leaders".
    If you're not sure about a particular girl, then watch her interact with other people -- especially mixed groups, but also just with her girlfriends. If she tends to point her body language toward someone else who's dominating a conversation, or if she tends to match the speed and volume of her voice to those of others, then... she tends to FOLLOW a vibe set by someone else. In the interactions you're talking about, YOU are that someone else.

    In that case:

    • If YOU act like you've done something wrong when you get "caught", then, she'll take that cue from you -- and then SHE'LL think you've done something wrong.

    • If YOU are totally shameless about it -- like, just give her a playful smile when she "catches" you, but THEN look her full on in the eyes for a while -- then she'll take THAT cue from you, and she'll just think of the whole interaction as fun and playful.

    Srsly. You're probably the one bringing the negativity, without even knowing it.

    As a warning, there are definitely *wrong* ways to do the "playful" thing, which will make you come across as creepy. But, IF you can avoid that -- honestly, you should know whether this is true -- then you can pretty much stare at tits all you want, and basically be like "yeah I was staring... and what?"


    If the girl is the type who tends to dominate conversations, and who sets the vibe that others tend to follow -- for instance, if she always talks at the same volume and speed, and others match HER... or if everyone else in a group tends to unconsciously point their body language toward HER -- then it's a little different.
    In that case, you won't have quite as much power to shape the whole vibe of the interaction.

    But, women like that -- speaking personally, since I'm one of 'em -- tend to intimidate guys way too easily, and so we actually appreciate a guy who's a LITTLE "out of line", so to speak. Keeps us on our toes.
    Same warning about not being creepy, but, other than that... yeah.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Not good, bud. Girls know when you stare at their boobs and don't appreciate it. And you'll get/have a rep for that. You're not the only one - some dudes can't help themselves. Better learn to control it. When you approach a babe, look up to her hair/eyes/forehead, whatever, first and maintain it. People who avoid eye contact are taught to look at their nose (really - management courses). Once eye contact is established, be casual, it becomes a non issue, and there they are; just a part of her persona and physicality , as she sees to express it. All good.

    Anthropologist Desmond Morris wrote about being males being hard wired to look at cleavage n his book, "The Naked Ape" google it

    But makes sure you're not a tit gawker.

    • Wait so girls will talk about it? How you stared at their chest?

    • Show All
    • Never had a girl as a friend
      Well a close friend

      And do women expect this to happen

    • They know who the "tit" staring guys are, yes and it becomes common knowledge among the girls

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 1

  • U focus and look straight into her face and try to keep your eyes focus on her face but relax your face and focus. Do not look down whatever u do. Practice talking with friends.

    • I try to focus like that but when i dont look
      I get the urge to look even more before i miss out on seeing them

    • Show All
    • They're like
      .2 seconds awau from their face
      And a lot of the times when i look they're big so it's kinda hard when they're like... obviously there

    • IK but try looking at her mouth then. Switch up the focus area to stare at. Practice not doing it

What Guys Said 1