Do you put effort into keeping around those you care for?

If you care for someone, maybe a friend, family member, girl, guy... do you put effort into keeping them around?

There's this saying "if you love someone, set them free. If they come back, they're yours; if they don't, they never were".
I don't like that saying one bit, because it's basically expecting the other person to put all the effort, but what about you? Why don't you put any effort into making them stay instead of just letting them go?
  • I'll try my hardest to keep them around
    Vote A
  • I'll put some effort, but I have a limit
    Vote B
  • I don't put much effort, or none at all, if they want to be around me, they'll come back
    Vote C
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115

Most Helpful Girl

  • The context in which you understand this quote you mentioned is slightly different from how I comprehend it. "If you love someone set them free. If they come back, they're yours; if they don't, they never were" - this saying only applies to a romantic relationship/solid friendship for me, as it means if a situation were to ever arise that would split us apart (I caught him cheating, he's looking to move away/my friend did a massive thing which broke my trust, I constantly get back stabbed by this friend... (YES indeed I'd try with all my effort to convince them on working out our love/friendship, but if he/they is/are so set in his/their ways... you can't force love/are friendship as it's a two way street to maintain it) I would let the guy/friendship go and not force to change his/their ways for me.

    However for family, it's a different story as family is bound to you. For those in your family (I'm talking mainly about immediate family) should always be above all else and be kept close to you.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • I do. I keep a very tight circle. My girl, my family, my friends. No outsiders are permitted to enter the circle of trust.

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What Girls Said 10

  • Lmao so the saying is "if you love someone set them free. If they come back, they're yours; if they don't, they never were". But if I don't like anything I'm dropping it too so basically I just have to drop everything then and end up alone 😂
    Anyways yeah I do put effort but I have my limits

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  • To be honest, I'm a better friend than partner. And I know that, and I have to work on it. So, I don't try hard to keep them around, they're usually trying to keep me around, and it's not good.

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  • I've always been the kind of person who puts others before myself and I used to try to keep everyone around especially my family... Now I'm at a point where I don't put as much effort into keeping people around. It's healthier for me.

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  • I do this but not with my friends only family.
    I used to do that to my friends but they all hated it so now I'm more of "you want to talk to me then talk to me, you don't want then don't do it".

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  • "If you love someone, set them free. If they come back, they're yours; if they don't, they never were."

    Or

    "If you love someone, set them free. If they come back, set them free again. Because nobody else wanted them!"

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  • Yes... if I really care about someone I put a lot of effort into keeping them around. I want friends in my life that I can say have been my friend for years and years...

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  • Always. If I care about you, then I'll do what I can to make you happy.

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  • I'll try my hardest to keep them around
    when i really care for someone i don't give up easily.

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  • I try, but I know I'm pretty bad at it.

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  • currently i dont put enough effort in at all.

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What Guys Said 4

  • I definitely put in effort... but there has to be some "give and take". He/she also needs to make sure to exude effort to keep ME around!

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  • Yes I do but there aren't many I care for so I won't bother with most people

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  • I don't care much for anybody to be completely honest...

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  • I do.

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