Do I sound commitment phobic?

I'm 23 and have never had a boyfriend and honestly I don't really want one. Sure I'd like the whole ' I have someone who isn't a relative or close friend who loves me' euphoria that it seems most people walk around with or have experienced. I think it's human nature to want this

But

I feel like yea you date and have relationships to see what works for you but it's kind of a waste of time if marriage is all the reward you get. I don't mean to offended those who are married or really want to get married but I don't see it as a big prize. Kids either.

Sometimes I feel like there's something wrong with me for feeling like having a boyfriend is almost like ending all the fun and things getting complicated with jealousies, suspicions and insecurities.

Like I said a part of me does want a relationship but at the same time it's like 'naaah I'm good'. ha ha so does anyone else ever feel this way or am I just weird?

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Sometimes I really want a boyfriend until I think about what you wrote in the third paragraph. There is so much more to starting a relationship than you anticipate, and often it's such a burden it's almost not worth the effort. Plus, a relationship requires that you take into account what another person wants to do. What if I don't want to watch a Phillies game or play golf? That's why being single is so sweet.

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • By ecologic standards, if you do not have children, you fail at life. Though, you're a human being and free to make that choice. The "prize" isn't marriage or kids. The "prize" is spending time with someone you care about. If you care about them enough to stay with them forever - then marriage MAY be considered.

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    • Hmm by my standards if your in love with someone maybe even get married build a life together then months, years later decide you (or them) aren't in love anymore you fail at life. You experience the world, be self efficient and know what happiness is without it being caused by romantic influence is 'the prize' for me. Like I commented below we all have our own desires, goals, etc. :)

  • I'm in the same boat. Sometimes I want a girlfriend, but at the same time I don't. I just don't want to be tied down, I guess. It's weird.

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  • I feel the same way and it both confuses me and depresses me :(

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  • I don't see how it would be a waste.

    Marriage is one the most beautiful things and children, I believe, that you can have on this earth.

    I've never had a boyfriend either. But, I'm not worried because I know that there is someone out there for me.

    You should prize yourself higher. My sister went through this faze and I believe it was because of her low self-esteem. The "who would love me" attitude.

    You will meet someone, someday, and you may change your mind.

    I don't like that saying, "plenty of fish in the sea." Because there is no one like you. And if you do meet that right guy, there will be no one like him too.

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    • Awesome opinion, thanks! :) I don't have low self esteem and yea I think there's someone out there who'll maybe change my mind buuut as of now I stick to what I said above. We all have our goals and desires, urs end with marriage and children mine just doesn't at this point in my life.

    • Okay, no one can change you.

      You are right, we all have a different outlook on life.

  • Yeah kind of.

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