I've put myself out there even though I'm shy and asked girls out before but none of them were interested. I haven't got a clue.
Most Helpful Guy
- You need to have a relaxed confidence with women. Think "James Bond."
- You need to NOT focus on one particular woman at this stage of the game. Approach EVERY girl you find attractive, introduce yourself, and have a bit of conversation. If you are still interested after 2-5 minutes of conversation, ask her on a date. If she says "no thanks", tell her "Okay, no problem. But would you mind giving me some feedback? Could I have done something better?" Listen to what they say, and if you get a consistent answer from several different girls, work on that item.
- Do NOT take rejection personally. Every guy, even the very best, most attractive, most confident, most popular celebrity guys get rejected, so you will to. Just think of those as opportunities to learn, and do better next time. Remember too that it's largely a numbers game. If you have little experience and little confidence, your success percentage may only be 1%, which means you have to ask out 100 girls to get one who will go out with you. That may seem like a huge number, but if you ask out 20 girls a night every Friday and Saturday night, in three weeks you'd have a date. Most likely, your percentage is higher than that, and the more practice you get, the higher it will go, and the fewer girls you'll need to ask before you get your next "yes" answer.
- Treat these girls NOT as super-romantic objects of your worship, but rather like a normal human being. Be aware that they are attractive, but don't TREAT them like they're especially attractive, because that will make you nervous. Do NOT put girls on a pedestal and treat them like they can do no wrong and that you have to defer to their every whim, or go overboard to make them happy. Act like you normally act around people every day, and either she likes that or she doesn't. Just because a girl has a pu$$y doesn't make her a better or more deserving person than you are, so don't treat her like she's a goddess. If you end up in a relationship with her eventually, THEN you can treat her that way a bit more.
- I can't stress enough that a relaxed CONFIDENCE is the key. Not arrogance, just confidence. You should be smiling a little smile the whole time, as if you know something no one else knows, and you should kind of make a game out of it in your head, so that you're having fun, whether you get a "yes" or a "no" from a particular girl. Even if you get rejected, if you handle yourself with confidence and class, she'll notice, and when she tells her friends about you, she'll probably mention that you handled it well, and her friends will be intrigued. Yes, even a rejection can work in your favor if you handle yourself right.