If a guy asks you for time what does it mean? I am asking this question for my girl cousin

Long story short: My cousin was dating a guy named Jesco for a while at the same time she was dating a guy named Jack. She got pregnant. 5 weeks later she lost the baby. They both felt bad for her but only Jesco knew that he might not be the father. She really wants to be be with Jesco. However, Jesco told her to give him time. What does this mean? What would you do if you were my cousin Ja'shandra.

*give her time


Most Helpful Guy

  • You need to realize that although it is your cousin that you probably love very much. You are still talking about a girl who has been sleeping with two guys at the same time and didn't know who the father of her kid was... It sadly is as bad as it sounds.

    Jesco probably likes her but will start wondering why she slept with Jack, if it was because he did or didn't do something ? if there was more than one guy, if he can trust the fact that she won't do it in the future etc etc etc.

    Given that Jesco knows that she has been sleeping around he will probably not trust her anymore, and if he says OK, he will (and if he is smart ,sorry) wouldn't go further than sleeping with her every now and then, just enough to get a serious girlfriend.

    In my opinion, if I hear that a girl is sleeping around I wouldn't consider her anymore as more than a real casual stress reliever.

    I lived something similar, I had a f***buddy for about 9 months, toward the end of the 9th month we started talking about maybe being more than Fb, I took a little time to make my decision, a guy I knew made a move on her, she slept with him, I heard about it. She asked me to let it go and to restart where we left of. I asked for some time (2 weeks ) to think about it, then decided to say ok.. I slept with her for the summer and at the end, broke up, and got a real girlfriend.

    It may sound bad on my part but I am pretty certain I wasn't the bad guy in the story.

    If I were you I would recommend your cousin to well.. find someone completely new, neither of the two, and to try to have many casual or one serious, you can't really have two boyfriend not wear condoms and not take your pill seriously...

    I hope you don't take it offensively, it is the brutal (although kindly phrased) truth.

    I hope it helps


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What Guys Said 2

  • It seems pretty simple: Jesco knows she's been sleeping around. He doesn't trust her, and that's why he's "taking some time" to think about it. Just the fact that he didn't immediately accept her means that he's smart enough to realize that he can't trust her, and so he almost certainly isn't going to date her anymore (though he might continue to sleep with her for a while, until something better comes along).

    Actions have consequences, and that's true for everyone. Jesco not wanting to date her is one of the consequences of her sleeping around. She's going to have to live with that.

  • I'm not clearly sure about this, But maybe he's confused or over-thinking of doing better things since IT happend...

    I say that, you ask him for how long, so that at least you're relieved ;)


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