Sexual Relationships
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What is Cheating?

What is Cheating?

From listening to my friends vent about their man, to listening to love songs about heartbreak, to watching movies, to reading books... everything leads to LOVE. It seems that in this day and age the only thing that seems to matter/be on anyone's focus is love. How to find it, or how to keep it/save it; we can't get enough.

But what has been really interesting to me, is how people these days can justify their behavior. Our lines of what cheating is, is skewed from person to person. And as far as i'm concerned it is 100% immoral to cheat. So here are some things that I would consider cheating in a serious/committed relationship:

What is Cheating?

1. Sex

This one is quite obvious. If you engage in any sexual relations with another person that is cheating. It really doesn't matter whether 1 or 2 of the parties are under the influence of alcohol. Therefore, it really isn't a skew when this happens.

What is Cheating?

2. Kissing

Unless you kiss the other person on the cheek, any other form of kissing by the opposite sex is considered cheating. Lips to lips is a sensual action and should be restricted to family/lovers.

What is Cheating?

3. Touching

If you touch someone, or someone touches you inappropriately it is still cheating- even if you don't go all the way. It is surprising how many people think its "ok" to touch each other in ways that are over the top. Unless its a funny bum slap from your girlfriend, I don't believe it is ok.

What is Cheating?

4. Emotional cheating

This one is the worst. Having conversations with someone else, be it of sexual nature or simply talking about a future with someone else... this is definitely terrible. Instead of a "one-time" sexual encounter people can spend months just planning out their escape.

What is Cheating?

5. Dates disguised as "casual hanging out"

If a girl and guy go for a coffee as friends, there is nothing wrong with that. But a dinner at a nice place with drinks and laughs... may just be crossing the line. Unless he is your gay best friend there should be no reason that you're going out on dates.

3 2

Most Helpful Girl

  • Decent take but I disagree with the last point. If the conversations are platonic and there's no inappropriate touching going on, then what makes the dinner different from the person hanging out with their gay best friend? Or friend of the same sex? Just the fact that both are heterosexual and one has a penis while the other one has a vagina? That doesn't really constitute as cheating in my opinion. If that was the case then you, as a heterosexual person, should avoid any and all contact with people of the opposite sex, as to not have anyone view it as "cheating".

Most Helpful Guy

  • Good post. I hate how some people claim that "cheating" only occurs if intercourse occurs. If people are in committed relationships, they shouldn't have a need engage with anyone of the opposite-gender other than their SO. I wouldn't be with a girl who needed "guy-friends". I'm too possessive for that weak shit.

    • so basically u mean your girlfriend can't have male friends?

    • @EmHenz That's right.

    • Thats not right man

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • i disagree with #5~ i've done that with both male and female friends, gay and straight, both in and out of relationships, and i see nothing wrong with it. it's just 2 friends having dinner together.

    (if i was in a relationship, i always invited my s/o along. if he said no, that's not on me.)

    if you have to hide it from your partner, it's cheating.

  • It appears you have been hurt by this, if so I'm so sorry for that. I define cheating in a different way. Cheating is when you do something with someone of a sexual nature (usually with opposite sex) that was not previously agreed to as part of your relationship. No deception and no lies.

  • ⟼Having conversations of a sexual nature with someone else, including my guy-friends and girl-friends makes me a cheat. This makes me a serial cheater, I guess. :)

    Would having a relationship with this humanoid called Harmony make me a cheat?

    https://youtu.be/K9qNtpsHsO8https://youtu.be/6vN0cs_-RSs

    • You should post a question with these videos on if people think this will be a positive or negative thing. While it would be good for social recluses to have that "emotional connection" with someone, I think it would hinder their overall social development and ability to function in real life. And there will be problems with people understanding they're only machines And personally I would view that as cheating if my boyfriend had one of those. That would be all levels of cheating if someone forms an emotional connection with the doll as well as having sex with it. Maybe I'm the jealous type, but I wouldn't let my boyfriend have one Lol at the dolls getting jealous. This is really impressive technology

  • Cheating is not ok and I definitely agree with everything in this mytake

  • Cheating to me is starting an emotional relationship behind your partners/wife/husbands/GF's/BF's back. Doing it on the quite and secretly.
    Everyone in a relationship is entitled to a fun fuck. As long as it stays at that. And both people in the relationship are open about it.
    There are always going to be circumstances where temptation arises in all relationships, for both partners. So it doesn't develope into real cheating, honesty is required. Sometimes you have to scratch an itch.

  • Yes. All of that. Pretty much anything you would do with another opposite sex that you wouldn't want your SO to see or hear about.
    Emotional affairs commonly turn into sexual affairs.
    Could write a book on this stuff, been on both sides several times.

  • "But what has been really interesting to me, is how people these days can justify their behavior."

    Oh the irony.

  • I cheated because it was so easy to get away with it.

  • Cheating is any penetrative sexual act.

  • You would know what cheating is wouldn't you lol :D

  • Coming from someone who cheated hmm

  • Cheating is ok

  • Emotional cheating is the only one I would be worried, sex isn't something we should fight, letting it flow freely is essential to a healthy lifestyle

  • Wow, looks you have done all types of cheating, good job.

  • Having sex with her mother.

  • Mostly agree - but you seem to just be focusing on guy-girl relationships like there is nothing called being a lesbian for example

  • This seems pretty basic... shouldn't be too hard to find a partner with the same views on cheating. Make sure you talk about it and don't just assume the other person is automatically on the same page. The only people who need to be on the same page are you on him because it is true a lot of people have different opinions on what cheating is.

  • There might be one or multiple factors. Sex is very obvious that if one is not satisfied sexually, he/she finds another partner without losing already one she/he is engaged with.
    Not only sex, also lack of emotional and mental understanding may lead to cheating. One may not plan to cheat on, gradually coming closer to like-minded person, it usually starts with touching, leading to kissing and finally sex, hence cheating.

    • you are right on how a relationship builds and becomes sexual

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