I was just going through my Instagram posts and sometimes i find myself looking at the dates.
“This was before he cheated on me”
“This was After i found out”
“This was when we had a fight”
And it makes me feel like shit.
I do trust you, i trust you way too much considering you’ve cheated and then lied behind my back. I’m trusting you completely once more and I’m once more giving you the chance to hurt me. But you know if you cheat or lie again, I’m leaving. I trust you, completely. I am trusting you to fix your mistakes. I am trusting you to not hurt me again.
I know this may not make you smile but I’m just thinking and writing it down. I’m not sure if I’ll even send this to you. Talking about it helps me, even if it doesn’t make us happy to talk about.
Sometimes i do have my doubts “he could’ve cheated again” or “is he lying to me” but they’re moments.
They’re fleeting and as soon as i think them i shake them off. I do need reassurance sometimes. I have forgiven you. I am trusting you. But reassurance is apart of why i can do those things. Even when we’re together for 10 Years, I’ll need reassurance you still find me beautiful, still only want me. It’s also just a part of how i am.
But think of thismy love, i want to be with you for 10 Years. I want to be with you for a long time.
I want us to get married and share our lives. Growing together is something i seriously look forward to with you.
You are absolutely the man of my dreams. Although i won't fully understand why you made the mistakes you did i am moving on. You are still amazing in my eyes. You are absolutely beautiful and i love you with all my heart. I know i show you off a lot and i don’t want you to think it’s just cause I’m tryna be that girlfriend. I am genuinely so proud to call you mine.
I love you so much. Without a single doubt i want to be with you.
***any hate will be automatically be reported. It’s ok to disagree but don’t be a jerk.