You Get What You Give! (Why I Love Being A Traditional Woman :) )

[Yads_Is_Back]

I'd like to say kudos to @MrOracle for his new take: Why Men Aren’t Committing To Relationships
because it's pretty straight-forward, and UNFORTUNATELY, true.

I think one thing that society - really Western society - misses is that while they're all fussing and complaining about men not wanting to commit and about women wanting to be promiscuous and all that, we traditional families are just sitting back watching and smiling. And I feel weird calling it Western society because I'm from Latin America and it is absolutely NOT the same as it is in the U.S. Here are some examples:

1. We are taught "body over mind."
Yeah, I'm not even kidding. We are taught to be fit for our husband, to be his go-to pleasure, and to be that only for him. Make him feel like a man. When he cries, wipe his tear and tell him how much we love him and how amazing of a man he is and how much we appreciate his hard work. Yeah, to us, toxic masculinity is not valid because, you know, masculinity isn't determined by expressing your emotions. Actually, the more passionate he is the better!

2. Yes, you're supposed to do for your partner.
Did she really just say you should do for your partner?
Uhhmmm... YEAH. Selfishness doesn't make a relationship. A relationship takes two people to make things work, and if any limits are put on it, then it won't last and apparently isn't worth it anyway. We women are taught to do for our men, such as having kids and giving him something amazing to come home to, and the men are taught to provide unconditionally, whatever it takes.

3. Divorce is looked horribly and very negatively upon. One who divorces is evil.
If you're gonna tell a partner wedding vows, at least mean it when you say it. Otherwise you're just blowing smoke, and you can't expect trust from anybody after that. Therefore, we don't sign what's called a "pre-nup" in the U.S. because we are committing to each other for that NOT to happen, so why would we sign for something that we are literally promising won't happen? You're cutting your foot off before you get in the door.

Divorce rates are WAAAAAYYYY lower.

Woah... What a difference in trend.😯

There are many more but I won't go over all of them tonight. Now let's turn this to the part where men are wrong:

So,

Do men really want to commit to relationships? Most men don't actually decide to want to commit until their late 20s-early 30s. This runs into a problem for men: now the good younger women are taken and married and you're left with whores. Then they complain that they can't commit to a good woman. Well... you brought that on yourself. Try committing earlier to begin with instead of being a whore as well. You get what you give.

However, I've seen men in their early 20s propose to a woman, ready to give it his all. I see this ALL THE TIME where I'm from! Wait... That's totally not normal! No, in countries like the U.S. it's not, because if the woman is wanting to do everything by herself and does not need a man and he doesn't need her, then why should he waste his time? Aren't you people in America doing some kind of thing where the woman proposes to the man now? Okay, well take the lead and let's watch how that goes.
It's not like this where I'm from. Oh no, nothing close. Men (and women) are NEEDED. That means that 99% of the time the man provides and the woman is the childbearer and nurturer. Which is okay... nothing wrong with that... But if we all decided to abandon that, have sex with whomever we want to when we want to, abandon responsibility, dress like we have no idea what "femininity" even is or like we've ever heard the word... let's be real, why WOULD a man want us if we were like that?
Just as we don't want a man who has whored around all during his teens and 20s yet wants us when he's older and ready to settle down. Ummm NO. Next.

So what do I get out of being traditional?
Well I will say that I've had marriage proposed to me by a very good man, I've been asked ABOUT marriage I can't tell you how many times and that's since I was 15, and best yet: men don't disrespect me as much and so many guys are actually nice to me, very respectful for this reason. I know women who love to walk into somewhere almost naked yet then complain about being sexualized. I mean... 😂 Do I get a blown-up inbox and phone with guys being disrespectful? Yeah. Any woman is gonna get that, really. I avoid those disrespectful pervs. But I can say this: I've had many people ask me why men are so nice to me. And it's true; there are plenty of men who have done a lot for me just to show me adoration. And obviously I haven't been into them back, but my point is that the guys who do this tend to be gentlemen. And the ones who aren't usually gentlemen tend to change to it when they're around me.
The lesson here is not that you should be trying to impress other people but that you get what you give. If you give people something to respect, generally that's what you're going to get: RESPECT.

Conclusion: So here's the thing... You get what you give. You can't be a man and trick and deceive women and whore around in your younger years and expect a traditional woman to want to marry you, be good to you, and submit to you like that. You can't be a woman and whore around or dismiss men because you don't need them and expect a man to want to marry you. If you want a more traditional partner, then you need to give that partner what they're looking for - a.k.a. what do you bring to the table? Because as much as men like to push this off on women, men in these countries tend to be the SAME way: wanting better than you deserve.
If you're somebody who prefers to live casually or just has no interest in serious relationships then this post doesn't really point in your direction, so keep it hanging ✌️

Personally, I think a BIG piece of this is humility. It seems like the genders want to live for their own selves and not acknowledge that we need the other. I'll be honest with you: I can't fix a car. I'm not even gonna try because I don't like getting dirty. This would be where my husband comes in, if that situation ever happened. (Actually, I'm not good with my hands at all. I'm no good with manual labor lol) Getting along requires humility, and until our world sees that, we will make no progress.

So although I do agree with MrOracle's mytake, men are no more innocent than women are.

[Anonymous]

Amen, sister, including the part about men not being innocent and having unrealistic expectations after whoring around when they are younger. Those guys are as guilty as anyone.

But MrOracle's mytake was 100% spot on in everything he wrote with respect to why good men are not willing to commit or get married today. For most men, most women are no longer worth the cost, risk and investment that marriage represents for a man today. And if women want a high value man, they will have to be perceived as high value women, and most women today simply are NOT high value TO MEN. They think they are high value because they are educated or have a good paycheck, but they seem clueless to the fact that men do not want the same things in a woman that women want in a man.

If you honestly consider what a man wants and needs from a woman and marriage, not including sex (which, for better or worse, is easily available to most guys without commitment, and certainly without marriage), and what the risks are to a man today who chooses to get married, the benefits simply no longer even come close to offsetting those risks. And that is pretty sad.

I know I speak for most high value men when I say I'm grateful there are still some women like you, Yads, who are honest, intelligent and traditionally minded. I'm optimistic that the pendulum will eventually swing back to a place of sanity where there are more women like you, and hopefully before western society collapses. In the meantime, men will continue to give marriage the bird in record numbers.

[Yads_Is_Back]

Thanks for both the honesty and the consideration ❤️

[Grond21]

This was refreshing to my soul to read. I want a woman like this! It's what my mom was like, and she had six kids. She raised us to value who we were, and to both give and demand love and respect. To know that we always have ways to grow, but that doesn't mean we deserve to be mistreated. At the same time, you have to know what you bring to the table. Sex isn't enough. Marriage is a partnership of two people from the day of marriage till the day they die. And that is exactly what I want.

It's one of the main reasons why women from more traditional cultures, like Latinas, are so attractive to me. Because they value the roles in the relationship, and they want a really good marriage. Something that will be strong every year. Something that their kids can look back on with pride that their parents did so well and were so humble and genuine to each other. So respectful and real.

It's what I'm waiting for. It's what I'm looking for. And it's incredibly encouraging to read about women who have this perspective and this day and age when everything is crazy and all good norms are being challenged

[Grond21]

Thank you for the MHO! And the other man you gave the MHO to? He nailed it. Better than I said, and he hit so many good points. I would have given him MHO too

[ragequeen]

People just gotta do what makes them happy. If men and women choose not to commit and that`s the direction we are going, so be it. Those people who want to commit just have to find each other, and they will. I do believe, however, that it`s important to explore yourself with a partner sexually and gain at least some experience (even if it`s just with one partner before marriage). Men have a sexual imperative and women cannot expect men to stay loyal if the sexual chemistry is nonexistent. And even though people choose the traditional relationship, it doesn`t guarantee happiness. People find others to fall in love with, both men and women have secret affairs and so on. Also, the benefit of not getting married is that both parts knows it takes nothing for the other to leave them. They could walk out the door immediately with no issue. No divorce, no nothing. So maybe that makes people want to work harder for the relationship because they know there are no reservations. When you get married, I would say over half the people involved get fat, stop caring and get too relaxed. Yes, it`s important to love each other no matter what, but you can`t expect loyalty in your relationship.

Also, marriage means practically NOTHING in today`s society. You wear a pretty dress and suit, spend money on a reception and that`s it. In the earlier days, people got married because that was the only way they could have sex and have kids with each other. Any other way was a sin and punishable. Today there are no rules against that. Yes, maybe people took it far and pornography became more common, people started normalizing gigantic gangbangs, STDs, and Only Fans, but maybe this is just the true nature of humanity? just because something was common before, doesn`t make it the right way to pursue happiness. As I said, people have to do what is best for them and their lifestyle.

In nature (with the exception of ducks, penguins, and some other species), you never see traces of monogamy. Both men and women are independent, even after sex. The male inseminates the female, and they part ways. The man keeps doing so, and the female takes care of the children until they can protect themselves. EVERYONE in this equation is independent.

[Yads_Is_Back]

I find this very atrocious (stole that word from the guy above LOL), but thanks for sharing!

[MzAsh]

I think a lot of men don’t understand what they truly have to give if they want a traditional woman.
If he wants a traditional woman, he needs to be a traditional man, meaning he must stay loyal af, want to commit early and young, and make enough money to provide for a large family. Making a modest 60k a year isn’t going to cut it. It won’t be enough. But how many men make 100k or more? Those men also have to understand how to lead properly. A lot of men think leading means making the decisions. There’s a whole hell of a lot more involved. I just don’t believe most men have what it takes. And I don’t think women have the patience to wait around until he figures it out.

[Aakash_Hangargi]

But if being said that it was a traditional women's duty to manage and maintain the budget how much ever he earned and balance it...

[Syrian_survivor]

That's fair and all, but if I'm gonna be that perfect, I'm gonna expect my traditional wife to be perfect as well

[MzAsh]

It’s not about “perfection” but about qualification. Trad women are strict. My trad grandmother is a slave driver. Mine doesn’t even regard my husband because my husband declined to mow the lawn one time 4 years ago. She says “he’s not a man” lol trad con women will crack that whip when it comes to a man doing “masculine” things. We seem to forget that though.

[Aakash_Hangargi]

Nagging is done by every one, it depends on there patience level iylts not only specific to tred women it depends kn how much a person has control over his words

[MzAsh]

Yeah I don’t do nagging. It’s better to just have someone who automatically does the things they’re supposed to do without you having to nag.

[Aakash_Hangargi]

Yup you are right

[Anonymous]

Oy.

There is so much wrong with this post. The logic is ahistorical and kind of conveniently glosses over the mental health and safety issues for women (and men sometimes too, actually) in societies that demonize divorce and encourage traditional gender roles. We know because we have been there. America isn't a bubble that popped out of thin air, our country wasn't founded at a round table of feminist activists in the 80s, my dear. The move away from that extremely traditional social model was largely because so many recognized the pain, suffering, and unhappiness that were present with that model. Not to mention, the domestic abuse. That's still an issue, but when society demonizes escape routes from emotionally and physically abusive relationships, we have a problem. That, among many other issues that come with this ridiculous idea that "divorce is evil." I don't for one second envy the miserable traditional woman who has to stifle her suffering as she attempts to breathe under the boot heel of traditional values and "divorce is evil." Trust me, most American who are not traditional do not envy that.

And for the record, divorce is actually going down in the U. S., as people are waiting longer to get married. So there is progress. The goal for us is not to imprison people into "divorce is evil." That's extremely unhealthy and likely comes from a religious place, which is definitely not for many of us. The goal is to improve the quality of those marriages. If the main reason you stay married is because you're being pressured to, because it's "evil," that doesn't scream "happiness, love, joy" to me. In that case, many of you are probably not smiling and watching at all. Many of you are probably as miserable and trapped as any of us would be if we felt we had no escape from bad marriages, and chose partners when we were very young and naive.

If anything, I have a few "more traditional" friends who are going through divorces, one being left as a single mother and will have to sell her house after her husband had an affair. She even came out of the marriage realizing that she had been too traditional, and catered to him too much, so that when postpartum depression happened, he didn't like that she wasn't waiting on him hand and foot anymore and he cheated on her. He asked for a divorce. Literally all my traditional friends who are going through divorces have versions of the same story - their relationship focused too much on catering to the man, and when they needed focus on them or they changed emotionally, the guys didn't know how to return that care. I don't envy it all.

Those of us who want to be traditional, are. I know American women who favor traditional values. Here in major cities, it's much less common than out in the countryside, but this country is extremely large and the living and cultural contexts are quite varied. And most American women are still doing versions of traditional things. It's kind of crazy, because as women have taken on careers, many still doing most of the cooking, cleaning, and child rearing. I disagree with that, but it's how my mother was and it's how most of my friends' mothers were as well. You need to educate yourself before making claims about American women that are wildly inaccurate. For example, it's still extremely uncommon for women to propose marriage. You literally don't know what you're talking about lol And that's before the slut shaming and calling people whores. What happened to your "humility" when you decided to judge and degrade someone as a "whore" for enjoying their sexuality? Interesting how that works out. A lot of talk, maybe very little actual empathy, humility, and grace.

[Opinion Owner]

I do think you are talking to a specific audience though - people who want to be traditional and maybe don't value logic, history, or facts as much. And I get that. I will just remind everyone, that plenty of nontraditional people are in committed relationships and marriages. Plenty of so-called traditional people seem to still struggle to find themselves in the marriages that they idolize so dearly, or end up unhappy in said arrangements, which is interesting. I welcome everyone to step out into reality, educate yourselves about history and economy (affects marriage rates), and live your lives according to your own values. <3

[Yads_Is_Back]

Thank you for your opinion.
No, I do not empathize with anyone who makes a mistake, complains about the consequences, and then keeps doing it over and over again and complain some more. Nope, no empathy there.
As far as humility, humility comes with the acknowledgment of the fact that I’m one out of like 8 or 9 billion people (in what you’re saying, not the way it’s used in the post, but you’re still right nonetheless) but it does not mean that I should agree with what’s wrong and say it’s right. That gets into integrity :)

[Yads_Is_Back]

As for grace, grace is not mine to give. That also comes along with humility. Who am I to give grace when I need it too?

But thanks for sharing

[Opinion Owner]

Hmm... I'm not sure that you understand what humility is. I also question your self-awareness, as most humans repeat patterns and mistakes. I've yet to meet someone who doesn't do that at all and I think most psychologists would say the same. Your subconscious mind basically compels you to repeat mistakes or patterns to some degree. So I'm inclined to believe that you're unaware of your own patterns. Either that or you're super human, which is unlikely.

Doesn't actually matter, but you kind of emphasized these things, so if you want to talk about integrity, you should be held to your own words. It's incredibly difficult to be as judgmental as you sound and also humble, possibly impossible. I get it, I'm not the most humble either, but I am empathic and I think true humility often comes with empathy by default. I'm not a theist, but was raised super Christian. Humility is Christ washing the feet of the poor and hanging out with prostitutes and lepers, not wagging the finger and telling them that they're whores and they suck. lol That's not humility, that's what the other guys were doing. Kind of hilarious.

I also wonder if you have been in healthy relationships. To not have empathy unless someone perfectly ends patterns of behavior that can be called "mistakes"... doesn't sound like the kind of partner who can actually show up for someone in a healthy way. What happens when you find your romantic partner stuck in a pattern of making mistakes? Do you just tell him he's a (insert equivalent of "whore" depending on the situation) and tell him to fix it? How do you actually support a partner on a deeper level without empathy? Or do you only target other (likely nonexistent) super humans like yourself for relationships?

[Yads_Is_Back]

I think you’re taking my post the wrong way. I’m not judging and am not one to judge, since as I said, I need grace too. So if you take it as I’m judging then I assure you that’s not how this is meant.
As for repeating mistakes, yeah everyone does. But we are supposed to learn from them, right? I was referring to something that no longer stays a mistake, like... If I touch an oven rack at 450 with my bare finger, I’m gonna hurt and obviously avoid doing it again. Same thing with life situations where we don’t like the consequences, just don’t do the action again.
If you’re one of those who are more for living how you want to with the belief that consequences should be abolished, I’m not judging you or even saying you’re wrong for that. I’m just saying I don’t agree with it. That doesn’t mean I’m right or that you’re wrong. It’s just an opinion inside me and not forced on anyone else - you or any other. So no, sorry if I came off as judging

[raven6933]

There is going to be hate towards this but who cares. Women fight for equal pay for equal work. That's where it ends or should have never started. Do not know why for the life of me everyone thinks that the woman's soul purpose is the the home maker. That is not the soul purpose being put here. Yes her main role was for companionship but her more important role was and still is to quail man's destructiveness not to help insight it. Women should always be held in high regards. Everyone hillard about western world. In parts of the eastern world women are thought of as less than animals. My thought has always been if I go out and work and come home and help with the children and home at least she can do is take interest in helping with weather it be car, yard or house. Dirt and grease do wash off. I need not any quailling of my destruction, I've pretty much have that under control. If not it's always mine not someone else's. I really do not like having to pay for someone else's stuff. Besides it's not nice. The point I am trying to make is, women are supposed to be held in higher regards than men. If if no one likes it then tough. Without woman then there would be no life.

[Yads_Is_Back]

I agree

[Gravit1]

I am an American Christian Conservative, we also hold traditional values, but for me it comes from Biblical understanding and personal devotion to God. When I do marry, God will be head of my household, I will lead and Wife will assist like a 2nd Lieutenant. I will be responsible for all decisions made, even if the choice came from my wife. What you suggest sounds a little too husband centric, ultimately as Christians we should be God centered. I agree with you on the problems of modern liberal society, but casting dispersions on one country or the next is pointless. Christianity seems to be strengthening in South America and Latin America, while it is lessening in the US. Personally I still believe a Man should earn a woman. A woman that gives herself away free isn't worth earning. I've met women like you and you are very uplifting, but spiritual health matters more than politics. Personally I plan to marry within two years, but I don't script God. I'm glad though, you aren't a victim of the game.

[Yads_Is_Back]

Agree. Love what you said here

[guywithissues900]

Mostly I agree with you and it’s rare to find a woman with such a beautiful mind these days. But it’s problematic to see men sleeping around in their youth as being just as bad as women sleeping around in their youth. It’s not even close to being the same thing.


Young men sleep around because they want women. It’s a natural thing for us. But young women sleep around because that is whats “trendy” today. They think that will make them more independent and “liberated” when in fact it just makes them look like sluts who don’t have any type of standards.


Young men who sleep around are just doing something out of instinct almost. It’s like a thing that comes with us when we’re born. It’s not the same with women.


If i’m looking for a wife, she needs to have an extremely low body count (less than 2!). Obviously a virgin is highly preferable.


I’ve slept with dozens of women, but that doesn’t affect my ability to love and settle down eventually. It’s absolutely different for women—you guys associate emotions and feelings of attachment with sex, which is why you women generally prefer sex WITHIN the boundaries of a relationship. Guys don’t care if you’re dating or not to want sex from you.


So, if you’re a woman, sleeping around is not something you want to do if you want to be a good wife or if you want men to look at you with admiration and respect.

[Yads_Is_Back]

Same with men. Nothing you said justifies it for men. I understand the biology of it, but that doesn’t determine morals or values. If you want a woman who is more virtuous then you need to be virtuous yourself.

[Daedelus]

Dude, this is an absolutely atrocious attitude to have, and based on completely false assumptions about gender roles. It's "natural" for men to sleep around, but if women do it they're sluts? You've slept with "dozens" of women, but your ideal wife must be a virgin? Women have the right to do whatever they want with their bodies, as long as it isn't hurting anyone - as do men, for that matter. It's completely okay and normal for women not to associate sex with emotions, just as it's completely okay and normal for men to only want to have sex within the boundaries of a relationship. To anyone reading this who plans on marrying a dude, let me ask: would you really want to marry someone whose main concern isn't your personality, or your dreams in life, but rather how many times you've had sex?

[BlueStarPenguin]

This man just trying to live a 1850s mindset in a 2020 world. I dont think its working out for him, but he's trying.

[BlueStarPenguin]

@Daedelus Its just a troll , getting those rises, trying to act like he wins a game he made up and no one else knows the rules too. No one else agrees with him and don't worry, men and women aren't really like this in the real world, just in the one he made up in his head. The rest of us our living in 2020 where, thankfully, no rules and limitations like his actually apply.

[Daedelus]

@BlueStarPenguin Bloody hell amen to that. It's just a bit worrying how many people on this site seem to agree.

[guywithissues900]

Not a troll and not living in the 1850s, just speaking facts.

[Anonymous]

Wow, I very much agree!!! America sucks though! Some men here will say they want traditional women just to turn around and cheat with ones that aren’t.. It’s honestly so backwards that a lot of women end up subjecting themselves to being whores because that’s what some men here only seem to be attracted to. A few men only treat woman they’re attracted to nicely and others only pretend to be nice assuming they’ll get something in return such as sex, a date, phone number etc and when you refuse they turn around and treat you poorly.
I can’t speak for all but majority of what I've witnessed are men looking for ownership rather than partnership and women just looking for security more than anything. It’s like self respect and morals went out the window on both sides to the point people are only settling for what they can get with the idea of marriage being the very last thing on their mind. Also I don’t think most people realize the reason they might still be single is because they probably don’t bring as much to the table as they thought they did.

[Yads_Is_Back]

You’re so right!!

[PinkGuy]

the problem is that women have a dumb mentality when it comes to choosing men, u often go to guys that are already on a relationship or recently left one, u dont bother to actually grow with someone, u want to pick an already matured fruit, but this fruit already gets all the praise, so what is going to hold him faithful? basically, a lot of women will say something in the lines '' guys say they want a hot, loyal, virgin girlfriend, pff like thats possible'' but then, u pull out an, ''i want a guy who does the first move, looks good, has a soft side, is confident, stacked bank account, good in bed, and only has eyes for me, even if i dont like working out myself, he has to'' cmon, u're better than this, i dont want to be like this but this reminds me of that joke of '' she wants a 5'000$ ring, a 25'000$ wedding, a 50'000$ car, and a 500'000$ house and all she has to offer in return is a pre-owned pussy'' - random person on the internet's joke

[Kaazsz]

So I’ve come across some statistics recently. Apparently in the US the population as a whole, both men and women, are having less and less sex.


However a small percentage of the population is now having insane rampant sex.


And I guess the rest of the population who isn’t having sex, is believing that the small minority of people having rampant sex is representative of the entire population.


I think most people want to settle down and get married. But we have a sex culture and everybody is afraid to settle down because we all believe that the opposite sex are sex crazed maniacs.


Women believe all men want is sex. And men believe all women want is to party and fuck alpha male’s until they’re 30 and settle down with a beta provider.


Nobody wants to be the second choice. The “settle because I have to to satisfy the urge nature gave me for companionship even though I would prefer to just fuck a new person every week.”


Well apparently both are wrong. Most people do want to settle but we are trapped in a system of belief about eachother that is bad.


And I’ll admit it’s hard for me to believe that it’s not true. It really does seem to me like women want to fuck the big alpha guy, have his baby, and find some beta simp to raise alpha guys kid. And I see it all the time. I feel like most guys however are cool with settling with an average girl, if only he didn’t believe she already had her fun time fucking 100 guys and now she’s just settling for him.


I don’t even think the problem is that women fuck a lot. The problem is we know we are the one you settle for because the one you really want you fucked 100 of them and none of them wanted you.


Well, maybe it’s not correct after all. The study I saw seemed to show that the overwhelming majority of the population is having less and less sex. So I guess somehow We have to break the bad beliefs we have...

[centerline]

Very well said...

my opinion is that men blame women for their troubles, and women blame men for all of theirs... the real truth is that we are ALL in this together and we ALL make bad decisions sometimes (some people more than others)... so it may be the guy making a bad decision this time, and next time it may be his woman... and all bad decisions lead to the same place if we can't be more forgiving and understanding of each other.
some relationships just aren't right for the two people who are trying, which there is usually one trying harder than the other, and so the love and respect may fade away and become unrecoverable if there is no understanding...

its also true that sometimes one or the other person has something in their life that consumes their thoughts to the point that they become less intimate/sensitive/observant of the needs/wants/desires of their partner, which DOES NOT mean they dont love them anymore, but only that their thoughts are being consumed by other issues at the moment, in which case the relationship could be just as strong as it ever was...
in response to this observed behavior, all one can/should do is offer support, love, caring and understanding... but in no case should one get upset because they aren't the center of attention for a couple weeks, or because their mate gets a bit snippy, but just give all of their positive energy to their mate, and wait it out and see where it goes, BECAUSE it will either get better, or it won't, and no amount of getting upset or angry is going to make it better... possibly worse, but never better.

more relationships fail because of lack of understanding than for any other reason... selfishness being at the top of the list of all the reasons that one chooses not to be more understanding of the perceived shortcomings of their mate... a very easily solved problem that too often ruins what may otherwise become a happy relationship.

[GlitterFairy16]

I also like the idea of traditional relationships but a lot of people think traditional relationships means only a man and women. The man should go work and be in charge of all the money whilst the woman cooks, cleans and pops out babys.

I believe in traditional values more, were both parents are in the picture whether it's a two dads, two mums or a mum and dad. Yes of course partners should comfort and support each other that's apart of being in a relationship there's nothing traditional about that it's just the decent thing to do.

I just hate the idea of a man going to work and having all that pressure to be the soul income for a family and then tell the women what she can and can't spend the money on when he wouldn't know what to spend the money on because he's not the one running the house and it's his money not hers as she's doesn't have a income of her own to make her own choices. To me that sounds extremely scary and not equally beneficial. a lot of people see a traditional relationships as the woman being the personal slave. Im sorry but just because a man puts a ring on my finger doesn't there for mean I've sign a life binding contract to clean the shit stains out his boxers. Both partners should be equally involved in every part of a relationship as a main part of a healthy relationship is working as a team and having shared experiences it's how we learn to better understand each other.

[Anonymous]

That bit about men looking to settle down too late really hit home. I realize now how foolish it was of me to focus on my education and get a postgraduate degree instead of getting married to whoever my parents thought was the hottest choice.
Arranged marriages are what is traditional in my part of the world, and it makes so much sense as a guy: your rich family picks a hot chick from another rich family, and the girl has to be really pretty but the guy only needs to exist! It's perfect. And yes, like other religious communities, we really frown on divorce, so there's no escape for her. I would have had my own sex slave from my early twenties onwards, used her body any way I liked, kept her from eating if she tried to get fat. Once I got bored of her, I could have had her killed and HER OWN FAMILY would have helped me with the cover-up because hey, family reputation is the most important of traditional values! It's frowned upon to make the family look bad by letting the police or the law pry into our personal matters. Then, freshly single in my middle age, I still wouldn't need to worry about finding my next fucktoy because guess what? As far as tradition goes, I'm still an eligible bachelor from a wealthy family. So I'll pick someone young enough to be my granddaughter and start fucking her inside out as soon as the marriage ceremony is over.
Damn I love traditional values. These dumb conservative chicks don't have a fucking clue how powerless they are because they're so doped up on the validation they get for being slaves.

[Yads_Is_Back]

Damn 🤣Who stepped on your shoe today?
None of that is right, but you do you

[Opinion Owner]

I hope you realize that the answer was satirical. Traditional gender roles are pretty stupid. I like to cook and clean the house, frankly I wouldn't trust anyone else to do a good job. I wouldn't want to be with a woman who didn't have career plans either, it shows a lack of ambition. My parents got divorced despite their very traditionally arranged marriage so yeah excuse me if I don't have faith in that bullshit.
Bottom line: you'll be good partners if you're good people, not someone else's idea of a good man or woman.

[Yads_Is_Back]

Yeah, I agree with that last part to an extent, but obviously it’s not always true.
I know it was satirical. I’m just saying it’s not correct about traditional families. If you weren’t raised traditionally and especially if you grew up somewhere like America then I can see why you might think this. If you’re not trolling

[Virgo31]

Honestly I wanna focus on myself and have a solid career before even considering to settle down. I wanna make that big money and I don’t really agree on just staying home to be some sort of housewife. Tbh it seems like a waste of time to just sit around and clean instead of working. Plus I hate cleaning so much! You said women are supposed to give him something to come home too? Thank really doesn’t make sense to me, it should be a even household. We both work, put in equal effort to keep the house clean, and put aside time for each other. Just creating a fully functional system creates a happy household and marriage in my opinion. Nice my take though

[Yads_Is_Back]

If you make it work I’m with you.
I have a degree. It’s not difficult.

[blank_expression]

Today, there is no reason to bond a relationship because hungry women are plentiful, they make their own money, and I love the simple life, burn a steak and drink coffee out of a Mason jar. Women love to play and get their body count up so why should I interfere with that. The only reason women marry anymore is to increase their square feet to impress their girlfriends. That requires a supplemental income male person (simp), and as long as he can pay, he can stay in his side room-den-man-cave. He will have to tolerate his wife f-n around because these women do not expect their lifestyle to change at all after the big marriage party. If he doesn’t earn, or complains, he is out on the street permanently with garnished wages. Traditional women (if you really know what that is) are dwindling and so is society. This in the Cultural-Marxist end game.

[Yads_Is_Back]

You made ONE sentence that has anything to do with this post: “Traditional women (if you really know what that is) are dwindling and so is society.“ The rest is irrelevant.

[blank_expression]

Of course it all applies and is relevant. You said “you get what you give” and I am explaining by example they don’t give so they don’t get. In addition because they don’t give I don’t give. I also pointed out the there is a false sense of give and get through materialism and the creation of the simp and thereby traditional is in decline. Which part don’t you get?

[Yads_Is_Back]

Ahh I get ya. My bad for missing the connection. (I just woke up, okay 😂)
I get you now. Well I think you’re ignoring the other side. Women aren’t going to give unless men give too.
The rest, yes true, but I’m not part of that and therefore that topic is true but still doesn’t need my input. I’m not part of that and don’t want to be.
So yeah... You get what you give. I don't know what your definition of “simp” is, but again, that’s a topic off of this. Sure, the topics are related, just like basic addition is related and eventually leads to calculus, but let’s avoid the big vast expansion, shall we 😂Stay on topic, por favor :)

[Yads_Is_Back]

I don't know where simp comes in with this (It was not meant to.), and it tends to be something you guys on here looooove to debate and I have better things to do than listen to it.
Somebody else may read your post and jump on it, I don't know, but it was mentioned nowhere in the take and by no means is drawn as a conclusion.

[blank_expression]

okay

[Yads_Is_Back]

@havingfun101 How many accounts do you have? 😂Girl, get off my posts.
Just because your dating life sucks doesn't mean that's the way it is for everybody. Boo hoo

[oddwaffle]

Actually it has more to do with money than anything else.

Women weren't able to get a real job back then so their only "job" was to be a "wife". This is also the primary reason that a lot of women ended up in poverty after their husband abandoned them. It was also the primary drive to create and sustain the oldest job in human history, prostitution.

As women start to get better jobs and wages they become picky with their "husband" candidates. Since women can support themselves for a long time, they tend to get more romantic and much more willing to wait for "Mr. Right" than "Mr. Right-Now".

So it is pretty much the natural thing to get to today's situation. You can't stop it and it's not going to change unless you can take away women's ability to support themselves.

[IronLady6354]

There are a lot of ways I do agree with traditional values. I do agree that family is the #1 most important thing. I also have no hesitation in saying that my role as a wife and a mother is far more important than anything I do at work. I also do agree that divorce culture is a huge threat to the family/morality in our society.

However, there is still a lot of sexism in some aspects of traditionalism. But outside the sexist aspect of it I do think I'd very much agree with you that traditional values are an excellent way to live life and build a healthy society.

[DocT1977]

I have not yet seen Oracle's take on this. Based on what I see here, I know it was good. Onto what you wrote. Your perspectives with what you see are on the money. WHat it comes down to is the inability of BOTH genders to hold each other accountable and both sides always lower the standards and always complain and generalize when they got sub par material. Well, this is how it goes when people lower their standards.

[Yads_Is_Back]

Wow. You are the first guy I've seen speak the fact that men are also entitled too and that they should have their standards too.
If I saw you irl rn I would treat you like a celebrity lol

[DocT1977]

Thank you! Well, if you look at arguments on both sides, they are both the same, if not, identical. It happens like that because because we have trained our minds to take whatever we can get instead of training our minds to go into chooser mode. Another thing I would like to point out is that many people here in the United States are starting relationships bedroom first. This is a big mistake. Save the journeys to the bedroom until the commitment stage. If people just want to screw around, they're not going to wait. They're gonna go fool around with someone else while you on the other hand just eliminated a potential cheater. If BOTH sides did this, both sides would have a great deal of respect for each other instead of trashing the other side for being nasty all the time. Only takes a look in the mirror.

[Yads_Is_Back]

You truly are a smart guy

[tofamous]

Wow I like you that is so true but Here in America we havea movement called women's lib which is fine women are = a man but face it a man can't do things a woman can do in a woman can do a lot of things a man can do were made differently Lot of men though can pick 200 pounds all day long but he can't hold that 12 pound baby for 15 minutes without struggling why is were made differently And I sincerely believe that if My every thought and action is to please her I don't have to worry about me if she has that attitude about me Then Conversations are better The private time is wonderful harmony and is so much easier to go to work every day and provide for her and to take care of her because it's real Dam I miss that relationship I'm just saying it's real

[imanf7]

It's all cute and nice until you actually live it. I live in a traditional society and it's not always the best, a lot of men get away with a lot of shit just because they're men and women are afraid of divorce . and the main reason that women are traditional is because their men support them financially that's what happened before.
It was never about being traditional or not , it's about being a decent human being , good communication, respect for your partner and love.

[errorgoodnameunfound]

Agreed. The key though is balance. Everyone seems to forget that exists. You can have a mix of traditional and modern ways, just don't lie that you are more one than the other and be willing to negotiate. I for example am Satanic in terms of belief to some degree, which in some regards sees "sins" such as greed a good thing, yet I am much more of a virgin than the average preacher's daughter, not to mention, I do not drink, smoke, take drugs, party, or likely ever will. This means both a more traditional and progressive person could get along with me extremely well. But it is difficult to convince anyone too far in one of them to cool it a bit.

[supercutebutt]

This is ridiculous and most likely phony. You don't need a husband to have a running car. There are places called auto repair shops. Anybody with a functioning brain knows this.

[Yads_Is_Back]

And those mechanics... Aren’t like 98% of them MEN?

[Yads_Is_Back]

Anybody with a brain also knows that if you want kids a man is needed. Therefore, the point stands that men are needed.

[supercutebutt]

Even your responses are nonsense!

[Yads_Is_Back]

No... Just obviously not liked :P

[supercutebutt]

This is just very phony, that's all. I don't even understand its purpose.

[Bidensucks2020]

Because your butt is open to any man 24/7. You will never get it.

[supercutebutt]

@Bidensucks2020 Please apologize for your insensitive comment.

[lanadelrey25]

America isn't into having women propose, only radical feminists do that, and radical feminists are in every country. This is slightly similar to one of my takes about how I'm a traditional woman, except, I know how to use my hands for dirty work if I have to. not saying I want to to, but i can bc I'm not a barbie doll.