Sexual Relationships
+1 y

Is a woman more likely to be openly sexual with someone who isn't boyfriend material (see details)?

Answer these points and state WHY (you can refer to the points by their label if it helps e. g. A2) A) Ok, it seems like women act more sexual/less innocent around guys who aren't boyfriend material? So both of the two hypothetical guys are attractive physically and both confident. 1. Boyfriend material guy = sweet to her, nice to her, respectful whilst still being attractively outgoing and confident, flirts whilst still being a gentleman, listens and responds to what she is saying whether by text or in person, texts her etc. Pls note boyfriend material guy may meet her when she has a boyfriend, is he still boyfriend material when she becomes single? 2. The other guy = not that sweet, more crazy, poser/player (e. g. will openly on fb post photos with her and other girls with him in the middle saying "with fitties"), acts more forward/in your face, more touchy, no sweet texts, only to meet, openly calls lots of women hot even in front of her He may act sexual/suggestive to her even whilst she has a boyfriend. B) Explain why most women (including nice ones) act more sexual (even more slutty/touchy) around guy 2 (the other guy) than a boyfriend material guy? She may pose more suggestively in pictures, she may text them back more and as well as being outgoing to said guy and not acting innocent, she may even sleep with him QUICKLY. Whereas the boyfriend material guy sees her being innocent to him, she may not be as touchy and is more shy waiting for him to make all the moves. C) Explain the case if she met both guys when she had a boyfriend and then she becomes single. D) Would she be kinkier/more sexual with either guy? E. g. in terms of how dirty she'd be in the bedroom? Would she be fully sexual and enjoy dirty talk with boyfriend material guy or love it when the other guy calls her a slut and tells her to beg for it?
Updates:
+1 y
How are you qualifying a good guy friend like in point C as someone who is boyfriend material, someone who is boyfriend material and you could hook up with (and still be friends) and someone you would just fuck? Is a good guy ruled out for sex? Let's not forget that just cos a guy is boyfriend material doesn't mean you have to relationship him. He might not want one either. Maybe you two can bang and still be friends (most likely given he's a good guy and isn't going to hit and quit you)? Why reward bad guys?
+1 y
Pls see the UPDATED QUESTION which is clearer: www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q2060297-can-you-explain-why-women-appear-less-innocent-around-less-good-guys
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Most Helpful Guys

  • I'll just speak from my experience with women.
    A1) Depends on the woman, and I don't know if I can really give you a generalization here. Except, that younger women will typically go after bad boys, and older women are looking for maturity.

    There is however some validity, and scientific evidence, that women go after men similar to their fathers. In a lot of cases, this may mean that they go after guys that are a bit wild, and emotionally distant. So, Boyfriend material, may not mean what you think it means, because it is more subconscious than anything else.

    A2) Again, depends entirely on the woman. Although in my experience, younger women will typically be more sexual with this guy; they will or also give this guy more attention. But, this guy could also be more of a life experience than a serious boyfriend.

    B1) Because the second guy is sexy. That's really pretty much it. The first guy is the guy you buy a white picket fence with, and have 2 kids name Charlie and Janelle with. That guy ain't sexy, he's responsible. I don't know what to tell you, that's just the truth.

    However, these aren't mutually exclusive. You can be sexy, confident, successful, and still treat women with respect. It's the way you make a woman feel, not that you are a dick.

    C. Again, depends on the woman. But, I think she'd be looking for a rebound and would probably go with guy 2.

    D. No idea. That all depends on what either guy is like in the bedroom.

    • Thanks, ok so A1) What about nicer/cute women who are those sweet ones? So why would a woman not like the first guy more than the second? I mean is it his fault he meets her when she is taken? What if he uplifts her and she enjoys his sweet texts and fun energetic vibe? A2) So things like him posting stuff on fb with her and other women round him saying "theboss" and her liking it? Wtf, so he doesn't text sweet stuff, doesn't demonstrate a caring attitude, but rowdy behavior leads to her being less innocent round him (whether this leads to no sex even, she's still very touchy right)? B1) I ran out of words, but the first guy is more your carey grant/casanova smooth talker. He is also sweet and a gentleman. Think guy in a tuxedo. She tells him he's great. The second guy is more of a rowdy guy who posts shit on fb etc. He's not physically any more attractive than the first. Based on this? The first guy treats women with more respect?

    • C. Interesting! Ok look so first it's not the first guy's fault he meets her when she is taken right? So is he still attractive in her eyes (they worked together at uni, he can't avoid her till they graduate and they stay in touch). As for when she becomes single and after say a year, can the first guy still be a hookup or only guy 2? And a relationship? Casual sex and life friends? D. Ok, so what if she wants to convey attraction to guy 1 or 2, how would she? And how would guy 1 convey attraction to her when she is single (after about a year)?

    • I think the general theme is that attraction is not, and never will be, a conscious decision. Women nor men, as far as physical attractiveness goes, are sitting there analyzing someone's vibe, features, confidence, etc. in a conscious way. So the reality is that the bad boy (and I would describe a cart grant type as still a bad boy, just maybe a more mild one) the bad boy is more likely to get a women feeling excited, a little dangerous, etc. which are all things that we may associate with love. The first guy, if he is not confident, but is good looking is probably not going to make them feel any sense of excitement if they aren't ready for commitment.

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  • in my opinion women are more sexually open with a guy who ISN'T boyfriend material, because there is no risk. She doesn't care if he thinks she is a slut and doesn't want to date her.

    To further explain, take the boyfriend-material-guy. When a girl meets him and finds him sexually attractive and notices he is "a keeper", she is SCARED of losing his interest long term and being written off as a "slut not worth commitment ".

    So out of FEAR and self defense, she holds back sexually. She waits longer to have any sexual play and out of FEAR of being judged as a "slut not worth commitment", she keeps some of her kinks hidden (such as liking to be choked/slapped, oral techniques, anal, etc)... until she feels she won't be adversely judged as a "slut not worth commitment".

    With women being viewed as the more innocent sex, women are VERY uncomfortable with a guy having the "moral high ground" over them.

    This is why a guy coming off as too 'perfect' when meeting girls is a negative. Show that you are are a sinful flawed human who isn't angelic and perfect... and women will be more comfortable around you.

    • This is a very good assessment which most women (including on here) won't admit to. They keep regurgitating the mantra of "Oh I want to have a meaningful relationship and more with a boyfriend material guy" and will just have sex with the player. It seems then that sex is not worth a lot to them then? Totally fucked up. As you said, I wonder, is a woman actually more sexually open with a guy who isn't sweet, kind, charming etc cos she can just stop seeing him afterward more easily? I. e. he doesn't give her value? Why would she not be kinky with him, who is to say he isn't dirtier and much better in bed than a player who behaves as I described in point B? What do you make of point C? Will a woman allow a guy who is clearly flirting with multiple women and not caring ABOUT her, to get away with dirtier stuff in bed then? And HOW does a boyfriend material guy come off as flawed and someone who is open to sleeping with her and still being friends as in point C?

    • I'll reply to each paragraph of text u had in your reply. I) Women like sex as much as men, her having sex with a player is EXACTLY the same thing as a guy having sex with a slut. Just for fun, no commitment, in the moment. Get out of the mentality of "she is rewarding the player"; embrace the mentality of "she is using him for sex". II) Exactly. She has no interest in dating the guy so she is just USING HIM [for sex] III) Women can't read minds. This is why it is important to APPEAR like a sexual person and as a non-perfect based on behavior. Make playful comments about her body, make a dirty touch, playfully touch her, curse, embrace the 'I don't give a fuck" mentality. Coming off as too genuine and not flirty or sexual at ALL, you will typecast you as the type of guy she wants to date, but is uncomfortable having sex with too early because of the risk of you typecasting her as a slut not worth committing to.

    • IV) TOTALLY depends on if she wants to be in a relationship, or if she just wants to play the field and have casual flings. V) Dude your mentality about sex is terrible. "Getting away with?" If she is just looking to fuck, his ability to be monogamous doesn't matter. In fact some women get with players because they're sexy but KNOW they are unfaithful if in a relationship, so they keep thing casual. These girls are USING THESE GUYS! VI) This is a balance of being a good friend, and showing your sexuality. Dirty jokes, comments about her body, playful touching... should also be done as well. Show your sexual side, don't hide it, don't come off too "goody-goody" or she will become uncomfortable!

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Most Helpful Girls

  • 2b) I believe most girls are sexual in some moments of their life. They have their moments when they want to allow that part of them to show, otherwise you only see glimpses of it. If she was single she would pose suggestively anyways. Not all the time, glimpses of it like i mentioned previously.

    I feel like guy (A2) is known as "the fun type" his not looking for anything serious, just whatever, go with his flow.. Girls who aren't interested in anything and looking for a fun time would be around him a lot.

    Guy (A1) If she knew his boyfriend material, she would only seek him if she is interested to commit and settle down with him for a long term situation. I'm sure guy (A2) spent no time getting to know her before anything but she's opened up emotionally to guy (A1) and he supposingly knows about her a lot (building rapport).

    2c) She met both guys, she has a boyfriend (you'd hope she's loyal) but things turn down hill and she becomes single. Guy (A1) would be there for her. To get her through the make up mess and etc, guy (A2) seems like he'd be the distraction.

    2d) It depends on her. She will act differently outside of the bedroom. If she is interested in you she'd show that affectionate, sweet loving side of her in the bedroom AND outside of the bedroom

    • Firstly, thank you for actually addressing the question here, must be one of the first! 2b) I get what you mean. Can you clarify glimpses of her sexualness? So you're saying: A) Guy 2 is the fun type, ok I get that. But don't forget guy 1 is fun as well, just not as showy and explicit (e. g. guy 2 gets you and other females posing with him and puts it on fb titled "hotties, like a boss"). Think guy 1 being your bond and guy 2 being more of a pure sexual player, no sweet texts, no gentleman stuff. It's just why would nice girls still be touchy with guy 2 and not with guy 1 (the charming bond like friend)?

    • B) But why if guy 1 is attractive, would the girl not want to also have fun with him? Given his personality, he is much more likely to be loyal and discreet after a night of fun. Hell, he even might be far better in bed (it's always the quiet ones). And who is to say he isn't up for that night of passion as well? A boyfriend material guy doesn't have to be a boyfriend. Yes guy 1 knows a lot, but why does being a good guy to her rule him out for having fun? If he's a friend, it feels like he's being used (since you're not going to settle down for long with all boyfriend material guys right?)

    • C) Yes you got the situation right. So guy 1 didn't attempt anything whilst she had a boyfriend. He was a good friend, in fact other than her personality, he might have avoided physical compliments (even tho he thought she looked hot). Guy 2 might have still hit on her or still been more sexual toward her before or he might not have. Either way after she becomes single, which guy would she more inclined to have fun with or flirt with now? Guy 1 might still avoid anything more than a polite consolation (he's not one of her girl bff's for instance). Would he still be considered attractive in her eyes even though he was a friend? D) Kinda get what you mean. But why is she innocent to the friend who is less of a friend (more of a player) and innocent to the really sweet guy and good friend (guy 1)?

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  • B. You are looking for a guy you have chemistry with and as far as that goes both boyfriend and asshole types are the same since your not looking for commitment. If the chemistry is there (ie. you want to rip their clothes off when you look at them), then it's there. If it's not then it's not... the type of guy they are doesn't matter. In the instance of casual sex both guys are the same, one is not good and the other not bad. It's sex, not a reward system. She is an animal that has urges and things she is attracted to just like he is. She is just using them and them her, so the "asshole type" "boyfriend type" thing isn't applicable here.
    C. Honestly if I met and befriended a guy while in a relationship I wouldn't see him in a boyfriend way rather just a friend way and I wouldn't bang a friend unless I really didn't value him as a friend. When you have sex with a boyfriend (someone you care about) you want them to stay around, if you want casual sex generally the purpose of that is that they won't, the relationship is strictly sex.
    D. How good the sex is and how into it and kinky she is has to do with the Chemistry between the 2 people involved & how strong it is (there are sooo many levels) not what kind of guy he is-lol.

    • If I want a relationship then I am going for the guy who: wants a relationship, has good chemistry with me, is thinking long term, who makes me want to be around them all the time, someone who makes me blush and happy and gives me butterflies... the full package. And I want to be what makes him happy and who he longs to be around as well. If I am just looking to "bone", I am just looking for pure unadulterated attraction... nothing else. the kind of person they are doesn't matter for "just sex". I'm not thinking, I am feeling hot and bothered if I don't feel that way around him then he's not the type I'd have casual sex with... the type of guy he is once again does not matter here.

    • A) I never acted more innocent around the guys I was interested in EVER. If I was interested I returned whatever they were throwing at me back at them. If they were more touchy feely then I felt more comfortable being more touchy feely with them. If not then I wasn't. A1. If I started being friends with them when I was with someone that is all I see them with. Woman don't see most guys as potential sex esp. friends unless there was always some kind of underlining chemistry there. A2. If he is putting out a sex vibe and that's what I am into then that's who I'd go for if that is what I am looking for. Chances are I never thought of him as a real friend and it doesn't matter so much if he's around later unless the sex is absolutely amazing (which nearly never happens for the first time... so I hear), then I'd want to bone again but not have him as a friend maybe friends with benefits, he'd be meat on call.

    • Interesting! Pls explain your points tho? B. So you're saying in terms of hooking up, the boyfriend material guy you met when you were taken, and who is your friend can still be an option yes? How does that guy know that you'd be up for casual sex as well? Would she not want to fuck the boyfriend material guy more than the player (who isn't sweet and maybe even objectifies women on his fb page)? C. I think you misunderstand. You meet a great guy whilst you are in a relationship. Then you become SINGLE. You are single. So is this guy an option to bang? Given that unlike a player, he would still be around afterward and still be good to you as a friend would (i. e. he's not gonna hit and quit u)? D. So what I mean is, can the boyfriend material friend you met when in a relationship (you are single now) be kinky with you in casual or relationship sex as much as the player (who might also be social circle)?

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  • Please don't use that "most women" lingo... The women you're describing are out to have a good time and looking to screw. They're not out to be saints or even "ladylike" and not looking for a "good guy" or even a boyfriend. Just like when guys go out, they women have an agenda.

    First off, I wouldn't be romantically interest in Guy 2 because obviously he's a player and I don't want to be played. At most I'd probably hang out for fun and be flirty in a group but it would never go beyond that.

    Secondly, if I'm kinkier right off the bat with a guy, it's because I just want sex. I'm not looking for a boyfriend. I'm looking for a warm body I want to bed. I'll give him my attention and say and do things with him so he gets the hint. I'm not looking for long-term. I'm looking for right now.

    Guy #1 would get my full attention but I'm not trying to sleep with him right away because I want to get to know him better. I don't want him to get distracted by the possibility of sex and take me seriously. I would flirt and be fully engaged in the conversation. With boyfriend material, I take my time. Once we're a thing I get kinky as hell.

    • Firstly pls respond to the lettered points as it makes this much easier and addresses my question. This is not a take. I will however, respond to your points: A lot of women then, sadly even the nice ones do. Tbh I am not interested in unnice girls! They are not attractive. The nice ones are (nice inside and out). But they also seem to exhibit the notion of acting innocent around good boyfriend material guys and more suggestive around guys who openly do the things I have stated above. Ok, so firstly, you not being romantically into guy 2 is a good sign. But then when you say hang out for fun, what stops you being flirty in a group with guy 1? This is what I mean. If guy 1 sees you on fb being very flirty/posing with other women and guy 2, then he's gonna feel like wtf? So I guess she doesn't like me. At the very least he'll feel hurt as he is acting extra nice cos he likes you.

    • Secondly, totally get you want sex, women do as do men. But what stops you from enjoying that with the boyfriend material guy? He might be boyfriend material, but like you he may also not be ready for a relationship either. Trust me, he'd much rather sleep with you which would be a hotter experience than a random girl he isn't as into. See point C. Who says it has to be long term. boyfriend material doesn't mean he has to become a boyfriend. A guy you know or girl you know might be hotter. Your last paragraph seems paradoxical. You say guy 1 gets your attention. But he's not is he. You're posing and being more touchy with guy 2 whilst acting like this innocent asexual girl for guy 1. I get you'd be kinky as hell later. But the point is, he would find it difficult to flirt and escalate if he doesn't get that vibe of interest from you. Look forward to your thoughts and would also like if you could also address the lettered points above A-D?

    • Sorry for coming off as being blunt. I was just being honest. If Guy 1 was in the same space as Guy 2, then I would only be talking to Guy 1 because Guy 2 is a player not worth my time. As long as the energy is up (assuming this is happening at a party or club) I would flirt more with Guy 1, dance, find excuses to get close, etc. Sex would likely not happen for the same reasons I listed above and because I'd want to see him again. I'd be up for making out if the mood was right. If Guy 1 sees me on facebook (after the event happened) having fun with my friends and gets offended because Guy 2 is there having fun with us, I'd think he was overreacting. That's the whole purpose of keeping it a group thing. There's other people there to have fun with. If anything it'd be a good conversation starter with Guy 1 to talk about how I wouldn't do all the things Guy 2 suggested or talk about the girl that did. Now he can feel confident that I'm not into Guy 2 at all.

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  • All the women I know do the same things with their boyfriend as with guys they hook up with. Least likely to have wild, experimental sex would be ONS, in my opinion.

    You could possibly guess that more sexually permissive girls are more open to casual sex, and also drawn to more sexually outgoing partners.

    My group of friends were fairly promiscuous and I've never seen them sleep with one kind of guy and date another, honestly.

    • She's not likely to be sexually engaging with men she doesn't want to have sex with, though. But she doesn't settle down with him, either.

    • That's a really intersting point. See a lot of the pua stuff online keeps on harping on about women will sleep and have kinky wild sex with one night stands/"lovers" versus boyfriends who they make wait and act completely innocent with as a "provider". Bit weird tbh. I would appreciaet if you could help answer my question though. I did note in the title "see details". I'm trying to figure out one girl in particular in point C. Answering points A, B and D may also help.

    • PUA stuff manipulates you to make you feel insecure so you keep coming back, driving up page views. I don't know her... Like I said, it depends on what SHE is like, more than the guys.

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What Girls & Guys Said

19 8

  • Nope, I am more open with a guy who is my boyfriend than I would be with some random. I don't hook up though.

    I feel safer with a guy who is my boyfriend, and know he will respect me and if I don't like what is happening it will stop. I feel like with a random person, they wouldn't respect me as much.

    • Interesting and good points. Please actually answer the question though? As in points A, B, C and D?

    • Would like to hear your thoughts. We are really talking about a single woman and two guys here.

    • I'm not really sure I understand. I'm not the type to cheat, so how would I get sexual with a guy who isn't my bf? Honestly, if I am with a guy, that is the guy I am sleeping with. I like guys who treat me well, not guys who treat me like crap. So I guess which ever guy treated me well would be the one I would sleep with. I can't speak for people who would be more kinkier around guy 2, as I probably wouldn't be with him in the first place. Sorry that I can't give more of a thorough answer.

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  • You can divide people into groups.
    I can relate this question to myself perfectly.
    Many go through phases in life and can go from being a player to serious as soon as they meet someone worth it.

    I wasn't going to refuse wild sex just because I hadn't met my man yet. I didn't even know someone so good for me existed.
    He is like the son of a preacher man whilst still being the best in bed,
    And I will be his wife.

    I used to have fun and text men suggestively because I didn't care what they thought of me and wanted too. But now I am more mature and wouldn't dream of sexting. It was fun back then though!

    My man today likes me classy, elegant and sexy. And I feel like I upgraded myself in every way.
    I met him at the right time because I was getting bored of being a party girl. Even worked as an escort.
    He would never ask me to dirty talk him and its so refreshing. So sexy. He is in control and has my FULL respect unlike the slutty men I used to be slutty with who I respected as people but nothing more! :)

    • That's very interesting and really nice points. Happy that you feel happier now, good stuff. May I ask whether you could please answer my questons in A, B, C and D?

    • Thoughts

    • How are you qualifying who is: 1. boyfriend material guy who only wants a relationship and hot sex in said relationship 2. boyfriend material guy who is a good guy, not looking for relationship now, is totally up for hot sex 3. asshole who isn't anymore attractive than 1 or 2, and has no qualities personality wise, clearly only interested in women's appearance and probably up for hot sex

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  • When I was younger, yes. I cared more about a boyfriend's opinion than a FWB's opinion. Wanted to try new things but was scared about what a boyfriend might think.

    Had one tell me wanting to be choked and smacked was "crazy, weird shit". Then, a friends with benefits got me into it.

    Now? No.
    You're not my boyfriend, you don't get my freaky side.
    Boyfriend? Get ready for some freaky af shit amd lots of it. 😏

    • Pls answer in relation to points A, B, C and D like mooky did. Otherwise you're not answering the question which clearly states "see details".

    • I answered. If I didn't answer EVERYTHING, get over it. Thanks.

    • Oh. I need to come back and edit this. ^^ That "You're not my boyfriend, you don't get my freaky side." is no longer applicable. Do what I want, when and how I want, with whoever I want. :*

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  • #NO.. Im a Woman and i do not approve this message.

    • Why? Pls answer in terms of points A, B, C and D. E. g. A Yes/no and why B Yes she might do that and why etc

    • Can u help?

  • A) Guys you want to actually be with you need to play harder to get. It's all stupid games. We're taught that guys want sweet innocent girls especially the nice ones.

    B) He initiates it. She's not sure the boundaries on the first guys. The second guy doesn't have boundaries so she has the option to create them.

    C) Depends on what the relationship was like if she was really hurt she will most likely want a guy that makes her feel hot and sexy and the "assholes" are usually better at that. Also usually don't want someone new right out of a real relationship so it would just be leading on the nice guy and sometime you just want to get laid.

    D) Kink has nothing to do with who your with it's all about your sexual preference. The other guy might be more open in the bedroom

    • Really great points! Ok, so then: A) But do you have to play hard to get? So for instance, she acts more suggestively/touchy around the other guy versus boyfriend material guy? This puts boyfriend material guy off and he feels like she isn't reciprocating making him more nervous and even more worried about escalating sexually? And why would a woman do that if she is more interested in a sweet guy? Does she not prefer those guy's qualities and behavior? B) Very interesting point. So is it just congruence? You act like a loud rowdy guy and she'll just run with it? But it seems perverse that she would be fun around a guy who isn't interested in texting her or listen to her and innocent around the good guy? So she creates a boundary in the good guy case, and poses amongst other "fitties" with the other guy? Maybe even sleep with the guy fast?

    • C) What if the attractive boyfriend material guy is sweet to her? I mean he must find her sexy, just didn't state that out of respect. So what should he do? And why would the woman not feel flattered or smitten with the boyfriend material guy? The other guy might be more rowdy, but less into her, less uplifting? They're both equally attractive, so how exactly does she feel hot and sexy? If it's been a year, does it still apply? What if the boyfriend material guy would also be up for having sex with her and still being friends? Why can't she just have sex/get laid with the sweet guy which would probably be a better night of steamy sex as well? D) But how do you know the boyfriend material guy might be very open in the bedroom and very dirty versus a boring/selfish other guy? Is it on the basis of feeling slutty to the boyfriend guy? Why would you be dirtier with another guy and innocent with a good guy?

    • Thoughts?

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  • I can only speak for myself. I'm demisexual so there's no way I would be sexual towards someone I didn't see as boyfriend material somehow.

    • Interesting point and very hot profile pic btw! Pls can you answer my questions in points A, B, C and D. Thanks

    • Like I said I can only speak for myself. I can't speak for other women or what they feel in this particular case because it's highly individual. And my profile pic is of Ariana Grande.

    • Oh yeah! Just noticed that. Well kudos on a good choice =) I get what you mean about individual choices and perspectives. Personally I agree with your viewpoint on life. But I'm trying to get women's "game" or acting for the audience. I can't understand why a good guy gets the innocent side. Could you help me out with points, B and C pls?

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  • Tl;Dr but to answer the question that I think you're asking: when I was single I was more likely to have sex right away with someone to whom I was attracted but did not see as boyfriend material because in that case all I wanted was sex and couldn't care less if I heard from him again... but if I actually wanted to date a guy I'd hold back a bit more and wait til it felt "right". Not just because I wanted to make sure he'd call again instead of just file me away as a casual fuck, but also because I'd want the sex to mean something with him, whereas with some dude I just wanted to bone and not see again, it didn't need to mean shit.

    • But isn't that really really paradoxical like you're rewarding bad behavior and punishing a good guy? Pls answer my points in terms of A, B , C and D

    • I guess I really don't see offering a much greater portion of who and what I am to a man as "punishment"... that's a pretty fucked up way to look at it, don't you think?

    • Some random dude I have zero interest in beyond sex doesn't get my respect, companionship, love, loyalty, etc. All he gets is a mediocre fuck and a bunch of ignored texts. The guys who's boyfriend material gets everything...

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  • nope, quite the opposite for me actually.

    • Explain and please answer in relation to A, B, C and D

    • Why? Answer points C?

    • You never explained

  • I didn't read the whole thing but I'd say I would be more adventurous with a committed relationship.

    • Ok fair point. But I would appreciate if you could answer the question. It's very readable and easy to follow. E. g. A - guy 1 cos of B - guy 2 cos of etc Please answer A, B, C and D. Especially C if u can

    • Sorry man. Your question is too long for me to read and I'm lazy. Just know I like guys who are good to me and we share a connection & have fun. If we develop it into a relationship Id be more apt to be adventurous. That's it.

    • 1. I like your profile pic, kudos! 2. Sorry, I was trying to be clear as there are lots of unhelpful useless arrogant people on here who profess rubbish. 3. If you can help on points B and C, I'd really be grateful. The lengthy intro is really for background information to allow you to provide an informed answer and save us time going back and forth providing corrective details (e. g. oh if she is taken, stay away -> oh didn't realize she was single)

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  • I'm more likely to be sexually open with someone I really trust and have known for a while so it's more likely I'll be like that with a boyfriend rather than a one night stand.

    • Ok nice points. But pls address the actual points A, B, C and D in the question. Would appreciate your help, thanks

    • I answered all your points by disagreeing with them completely.

    • Ok, well thanks for not being helpful. You get zero marks.

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  • Sure. Because there's no worries about having a future with him.

    • Isn't that messed up tho? So a guy who is boyfriend material gets no sex? You might not even boyfriend him, but you still won't have sex with him because he is a good guy. But an asshole who you won't boyfriend either, will get sex?

    • Lots of people fuck on the first date or within a few weeks. I was just giving an example for hooking up.

    • Ok but pls see points B and C?

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  • Most girls do. I've experienced that in real life, and even on here girl have admit that too.
    I've asked why they will have casual sex with a guy they just met, but would wait months for a guy they like, and they all said "because the stranger isn't boyfriend material".

    So yeah, most girls, except those who are religious and/or waiting for marriage, will have sex with a guy they don't see as boyfriend material, faster than with a guy they want a relationship with.

    • Why do they do that lol? So why can u not also sleep with the boyfriend material guy? Just cos he is boyfriend material doesn't mean he will be the last guy you spend your life with? Who says he isn't up for sex too? Can u also answer in terms of points A, B, C and D pls/

    • How are they qualifying who is: 1. boyfriend material guy who only wants a relationship and hot sex in said relationship 2. boyfriend material guy who is a good guy, not looking for relationship now, is totally up for hot sex 3. asshole who isn't anymore attractive than 1 or 2, and has no qualities personality wise, clearly only interested in women's appearance and probably up for hot sex

    • That depends on the girl, I can't answer that.

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  • Yeah, I would say this is true. I've seen this throughout my own life. If a woman is looking for boyfriend material she does seem to want to appear pure and virgin with him, I guess in an attempt to try to cement something serious. Yet when it's a guy she doesn't have any emotional attraction to she can/will act sexually open with him, yeah.

    Some women will still be sexually open with boyfriend material, but I do think most are like you're saying. I've noticed it too.

    • when you like someone you want tho take time to know them and se changes things doesn't mean she's trying to appear innocent etc. she could just genuinely want to take her time. i would. so it doesn't feel cheap. not so i doubt feel cheap. but so that i dont feel like im cheapening him.

    • sometimes people just do what they d bc its what they want to do. not everything is a facade.

    • I know, it seems completely twisted and retarded. Why would you act innocent and non sexual to a guy you like? So a guy who doesn't text her nice things and actually care about her problems gets the wild side of her? As in a guy she texts immediately when she gets a job or feeling happy suddenly, that's not the guy she is going to be sexually slutty or touchy feeley with? Could you address points A, B, C and D. Especially point C?

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  • I think it's true.

    • Ok so answer based on points A, B, C and D pls

    • Pls check out Profdon's reply and provide your thoughts? The last 5 messages on there if u can

    • Yeah see them? Or feel free to reply on Profdon's comment

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  • Boyfriend material= omfg gimme dat boy right hella now! *proceeds to Facebook stalk*

    If you're boyfriend material then you're then one getting All the attention

    • Please answer A, B C and D

    • Scree that I'm not doing homework. Look, if a guy is sweet, funny, and sexy af, then he gets the attention AND is boyfriend material. If a guy is sexy but an asshole, then he gets attention from ho's and thirsty bitches and everyone else cries because it's such a waste of eye candy😭

    • Point C, pls answer the questions

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  • I can't answer your question the long way but I can give a generic one. Coz its long.

    The answer is neither. For girls sexuality is about confidence. The more confidence girls have the more open they are. That depends on what they want too. Most guys want to have sex but a little would be conservative. Most girls however are conservative to an extent but some are open. It depends on girl. Back to sexuality with the open ones, it depends on their confidence and for most girls it's about their trust with their guy. Most guys don't mind taking a girl home but most girls won't be comfortable and open due to lack of trust.

    So girls are more sexual around their boyfriends, coz they trust them over time. But they can also hold back at the beginning to make sure the guy don't think badly of her.

    • Interesting, good points. Why would a woman hold back and act innocent with a boyfriend material guy? Yet also do B. And what do you think about C, what should the guy do, how would the woman react to both? Or who would she want to sleep with? And part D?

    • Well the thing is. Girls till the day they want to get married, will want to have fun. They have fun with the bad boy typeZ not with the nice guy. They want someone adventurous, Someone To bring about their wild slutty side and trust me m, every girl has a slutty side even if they show it in the bedroom only with their boyfriend. Once they reach 30, they want the nice guy. Coz they need a good dad who will stick around. This should explain pretty much your questions. I didn't get your specific questions completely

    • I get that they want to have fun. But even if a guy is "boyfriend material", doesn't mean you have to boyfriend him in the same way a guy doesn't have to wifey a girl. So why can't you "have fun" and show that "wild slutty side" with the boyfriend material guy who might actually be way better in bed anyhow. I would appreciate you looking at points B and C though. Need help on C.

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  • Yes. An anonymous tryst behind a dumpster gets a woman much more excited than her boring boyfriend. Tyrone the felon gets much more experimental pussy than boyfriend Bob the accountant, who only gets vanilla sex and birthday blowjobs. Alpha fucks, beta bucks.

    • I kinda get what u mean. So are u saying, sweet love making is for her boyfriend, and dominant kinky sex is for a (has to be attractive) guy who doesn't care about her? Pls explain point C (she's been single for a year) and who would she bang once, have a casual relationship based on sex with and who she'd potentially bang and be life friends with? Guy 1 she met when she was taken at uni (not his fault right?) Uplifts her. Think carey grant, casanova tuxedo guy, charmer. Gentleman, respectful, and she tells him he's the best etc. Sends sweet texts, they kept in touch after uni (not bestie, but meet ups now and then). What should he do or what would she do? by the way the guy is not up for a relationshpi right now, hasn't told her about attracted to her yet. Guy 2 - rowdy guy in her dance social circle. No sweet texts. Can be fun. Posts fb photos with her and other women surrounding him with "theboss" caption which she also "likes". More player, less subtle Thoughts?

    • She's not really interested in Guy 1 as a sex pal, but she thinks he fits the boyfriend/long term model better, so she will fake it with him while cheating behind his back. Guy 2 will always get her panties wetter.

    • I'm saying that the thug will always get the exciting sex. For the beta boyfriend, she will lay on her back and count ceiling tiles until he finishes.

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  • I wouldn't be sexual with anyone who I didn't think was boyfriend material.

    • Same here, and to prove that point I have only had sex with one guy whom I am married to

    • @phil2 Good stuff

    • Ok, but actions outside of the bedroom though? Pls answer in terms of points A, B, C and D. That is my actual question. I did specifically state in the title (SEE DETAILS). Otherwise the answers don't actually help me lol

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  • Who the fuck knows anymore? Women have no standards and have turned into hedonistic wannabes.

  • yes, for me that is the case, because when talking to a potential boyfriend, you don't want to push them away, scare them, so you keep quiet on those topics, more conservative then a nn potential boyfriend. talking to a guy who you aren't interested in romantically, about sexual desires, or anything sexual is easier because you don't have feelings for them, and is more of a casual conversation or flirtatious, compared to the previous, which would be a serious conversation.

    • 1. Pls explain in relation to the two guys mentioned in point A, your thoughts on part C pls. 2. As for what you're saying on this comment, "potential boyfriend" is key. You wouldn't necessarily boyfriend him. You might still just be friends. So why is he ruled out when it comes to passionate sex? He's more likely to be around instead of a hit and quit

    • Isn't it perverse?

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Home >  Sexual Relationships  > Is a woman more likely to be openly sexual with someone who isn't boyfriend material (see details)?