I have been with my boyfriend for 4 years. For the first year and few months it was rocky. I found out that he had cheated on me a few times. After finding this out I broke up with him only to get back together 3 months later. Soon after getting back with him I found text messages on his phone to girls he had cheated on me with, planning to meet up or just making inappropriate banter. I confronted him and he said that it meant nothing and I ended up stayed with him. Since then things have gotten much better and he has made many adjustments in his life that show he is becoming more responsible and more committed. For example he used to party every weekend but has now cut back on partying and 9 times out of ten invites me along. In the last little while he has started talking about getting married. The problem is that because of the issues we had when we first started dating I find that I don't trust him. I still from time to time look through his phone which I know is wrong but I seem to have an impulsive need to do. Recently I found a suspicious text where he called the person, unnamed in his phone, baby and said that he would love to see them soon. I love him very much, there are so many wonderful things about him and I feel like my heart would break into a thousand pieces if I couldn't see him every day but can I ever trust him and should I? Soon I'm going to have to make a decision for good because I know marriage is on his mind and I don't want to make a decision that is going to ultimately lead to unhappiness. Please help!