Please elaborate on your opinion, thanks!
- YesVote A
- NoVote B
Most Helpful Guy
No. And unlike the movies, it's the EXCEPTION to the rule that you just happen to run into a great person when you aren't looking. By far, the more successful strategy for finding a good mate is to MAKE A STRONG EFFORT and to TAKE A SMART APPROACH.
For girls especially, they need to realize that it's a numbers game, and a girl's job is to FILTER FILTER FILTER.
For every 100 guys you meet, only 2 or 3 of them are likely to be a decent match, which means 97% of the guys you meet aren't the guy for you. But at least 80 of those same guys you meet will have approached you or made contact in some way because THEY were interested (and by "interested", I *mostly* mean "interested in having sex with you."), so you're going to have to do some work to sort through which guys have potential and which ones don't.
You should be able to eliminate at least half of that number within 30 seconds - sometimes much less - because some won't be your type physically, or act like assholes. The other ones you may have to have a bit more conversation with, but the idea is to figure out what THEY are looking for and decide quickly if they are to be eliminated or not. For the ones that aren't eliminated (around 10-20 of the original 100), you may need to go on a date with them to know. Let's assume you go on 15 dates - 10 of them will likely be eliminated after the date. Now you've got 5 left, with 2 or 3 potential candidates. That means 5 second dates, and maybe 3 third dates, and you're likely to have a winner or two (realize, of course, that you wont' have 100 guys all at once - in reality, this will happen over a several month period at the very least).
The idea I'm trying to get across is that it's going to take TIME, WORK, EFFORT, and being smart enough to look for the RIGHT THINGS in order to narrow the field down to the best guys for you. You're going to have to ASK QUESTIONS designed to determine long-term relationship compatibility - not just what movies or music he likes. You'll need to talk about his thoughts on religion, family, money, sex, marriage, children, careers, etc. (this is 1st and 2nd date stuff, after they've made it that far).
Treat it like you've been tasked to hire the best possible employee - except YOU are the company and the position available is being your boyfriend. INTERVIEW them and go over their "resume" and make good, solid choices.2
Most Helpful Girl
The fact is that you should really stop looking for it. Do other things, get busy.
When you are desperate you will never find love ;)