How important is race to you when it comes to seriously dating someone?

If you are looking to get married eventually would you prefer someone of the same race? Mention your race too.


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What Guys Said 311

  • I'm caucasian.

    It would probably be a big deal to ONE of my parents. The other would probably hate her because they don't like anyone that I've dated... But I wouldn't give a crap.

    I don't know how it would affect things. I know I'd be fine with it; there have been many girls of all kinds of races and nationalities that I've had crushes on.

    Now, we don't agree politically in some major way, we'd probably break up just because of that, as opposed to something based on race. Getting married, I don't know. I suppose it would have to come up for me to know whether or not it'd be worth breaking up over. and I don't know if that'd be related to race vs over something else.

    I simply have no idea how that would change my life as opposed to dating anyone who could be described in any way. How would it be different dating someone with curly red hair as opposed to short straight dark hair? How would that change your marriage or attraction level? I don't know...

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  • I'm white. All but one of the girls I've ever dated/slept with has been a different ethnicity.
    It doesn't really matter to me for marriage or anything, but my experiences with these specific girls (meaning I'm not saying X race is likely Y, just giving my anecdotal experience) so far has been:
    White: gets waaaay Too drunk, can't make up their mind.
    Indian: was very two-faced and cruel. This particular girl also later admitted to being an alcoholic.
    Pacific islander: lot's of fun, very chilled out. Unreliable though (difficult to make plans with or keep in contact).
    African: also lots of fun, probably the least judgmental.

    Obviously different people will vary, but I think when it comes to marriage and dating that culture is usually more an issue than race. For example I've dated an Indian girl who for over 2 years of dating would literally pretend not to know me at times because she was more concerned about other Indians gossiping.

    My current girlfriend is Sudanese and we haven't had any problems after dating for around 8 months so far.

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  • Race is irrelevant to me. I've dated women of all major races.

    CULTURE is VERY important to me, though, and culture is often closely associated with race (with plenty of exceptions, of course).

    I'm a middle-class American suburbanite with a value system common to that culture - and anyone I date would need to be the same or at least quite close in culture to that - at least for me. I don't have any desire to share significant time - much less have a romantic relationship with - someone who doesn't share my culture and values.

    As I said, I've dated women of every major race, but they were all middle-class suburban Americans. The fact that some were Latina or Asian or Black was largely irrelevant to me - they were attractive and I was culturally compatible, and that's what mattered.

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  • Race isn’t all that important, but culture is.

    I couldn’t date an Asian girl from China... too different.

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  • Race is important to everyone. here's why. ATTRACTION. We're all attracted to what we're attracted to. Green eyes? well, you're limited to mostly whites. If you like red hair, yep, mostly whites. If you like black hair, dark eyes, a full round butt you're geared more toward brazillian. If you like a HUGE booty you're not likely to be into an upper middle class white jogger.

    Genetics - we're genetically predisposed to liking a certain body type. this means I myself like a B cup, small hips, flat tummy, SMALL butt, big butt.. no.. I like a more yellow tint to the skin, slight red but not required. Almost everyone shops for partners by this genetic shopping list... UNLESS, you want a trophy. Now I won't get into those who want trophies but many people date outside their own race because while claiming they're not limiting to one race they're really trying to upgrade their social status. Those trophies tend to look almost identical if you match hair, and skin color in almost all cases.

    Few races have the exact same body types as a rule. Let's say someone likes D cup, Does that keep them "open to all" when an Asian girl shows up? Well, more than likely she's not going to have what his favorite feature is.

    I think everyone likes people by race, BUT also people who feel they can't find their favorite race (due to limited chances of finding them) also allow themselves to open up to others.

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    • What are the trophies

    • @mishabartun Something one is interested in because it holds a status. Malcolm X actually spoke about adjusting one's goals for status in an interview. so my use of the word trophy is finding person that holds an iconic status that others will see more value in the individual despite the fact it's not exactly what the person would normally want, be happy with or want to be pared up with for the raising of a family and sharing of their culture.

  • I've race preferences and I prefer people who looks either South-European, Asian, Middle-eastern or South-American. But I wouldn't care about someone's race very much although I've my preferences. As long I likes the person's personality, smell and finds them physically attractive I'm happy. I do care more about nationality and culture. I prefer a partner of the same nationality as me, who can my language fluently and has a Western-culture. I'm not into none-Western cultures. Especially not Middle-eastern and African ones. I'm a Norwegian with an Asian heritage.

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  • Race does NOT matter, so many people are placing traits of a singular sect of people on an entire race. Im seeing tons of excuses like "oh he/she has to be my race or my parents will disown me" YOU need to stop depending on mommy and daddy to govern YOUR life, how do you think biracial couples are here? They most likely didn't plan on it, but fell in love with another person who happens to be another race, its like saying im only gonna eat cherry yogurt when there's plenty of other flavors that are good.
    Im losing faith in humanity bc we can try a new brand of clothes, try a new restaurant, buy a diffrent brand of phone and switch carriers, try diffrent foods but yet be so singular. why limit yourself?

    People can fall in love with ANYONE

    im irish-african American and has fallen in love with many women of diffrent race bc of the values of there character!

    To all the Asians, Black, Caucasian, Hispanic, indian, Latino, native American etc women you're all beauitful.

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  • Race is important whether it's an uncomfortable topic or not. Studies show in-group preference at all stages of development; like with like.

    If I'm getting married, there needs to be at least a mix of white for me. No qualifiers needed of "I'm not racist, it's just a preference" because it's just that: in-group preference.

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  • A shared culture is preferred, a shared race is irrelevant to me. It all depends on where you live. Where I come from, the only difference between the races is skin color, and there aren't any racial subcultures or anything like that.

    Race doesn't matter to me. The only thing that concerns me about a person's origins would be language and culture. Politics and religion change and I'd only care about what they are now, not what they used to be. But your culture and your language aren't really going anywhere for a long time. Not really anyway

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  • Actual race isn’t important to me but it is usually tied tightly to culture and usually defines if a woman possesses basic human compatibility. If I am considering hook up then a westernized woman is fine and easy. As a white guy I have written off western women (mostly white) as anything LTR beyond a couple weeks. I still can’t say the word out loud, but if marriage then I would only seek an Asian or Latina woman. I have to say I like different and an accent.

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  • I don't care when it comes to the biological definition of race. I care more about personality and ethnicity. For example, I'm black (North AND East African, that is), but I would rather be with someone who speaks the same language I do, or has similar religious beliefs.

    I'm also more concerned about a potential significant other's intellect. I want to be with a woman who can carry a conversation; who reads books; who I can rationally discuss or debate a bunch of topics with.

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  • doesn't matter to me. i've dated people of a variety of races and ethnicities. beauty comes in all forms

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  • My Race: Black

    My Preference: Black or mixed

    My Reasoning: Don't get me wrong. I am open to dating anyone of any race, and I have done so.

    As a kid, I grew up in a 98% white state and I was the only black kid in all my classes. Growing up in a white state made dating hard for me. A majority of white women didn't like me (romantically speaking), and the ones that did were usually the country bumpkin, heavy set women, which are the types of women I am not attracted to.

    I moved to Texas in '09, after high school, and I have dated a lot of women of all races since then. However, I feel more connected to black women. Black women understand what I am talking about when I talk about black comedians, they understand the music I like, they understand black struggles, black entertainment... basically just things I couldn't relate to with people of other races. That is why I prefer a woman of my own race rather than a different race. BUT, again, I am open.

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  • I am white and have dated white, American black, African black, European white, Korean, Chinese, Filipino, Thai, Malay-Indonesian, Cambodian, Indian, Mexican, Persian, North African, half white-half black, half white-half Chinese, half white-half Filipino, half white-half Korean, half black-half Korean, half black-half Cambodian, half Chinese-half Filipino, half Indonesian-half Arab, half Chinese-half Malay.

    Race isn't really important to me when dating, a set of characteristics is. It happens that those characteristics are much more common in some races than others.

    If I were to make a first choice for race, it would be Eurasian, most of the most beautiful women I have ever met are Eurasian.

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  • I don't care much as long as we are compatible. If we understand each other, are able to compromise, communicate, and not let anything about race hurt us then we are ready. However, my parents and grandparents seem to care about race. And I don't like that about them.

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  • I would prefer somebody my own race but it isn't 100% mandatory. I am white.

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  • I'm white. It really isn't important to me. I don't believe in races. We have same genetic characteristics. Only difference is that those who are darker skinned have activated gene for high melatonin production. White people have that same gene, but it's not activated. Eastern Asians genes were damaged long, long ago by damaging rays from space (i. e. Gamma rays) and that's why they have "narrow eyes", but that's only small portion of genetic material and that doesn't make them separated race. There's only one race - human race. You know Labradors can be yellow, black or brown, but they are still one race/breed of dogs.

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    • Dude, Wtf that's the most racist thing. I ever heard and I will like to you to prove this shit !

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    • I agree with everything you said. My intention was to write as simple I can so the text could be understandable by everyone and also to make it short.
      Thanks. I even learned some new stuff from you.

  • I would choose from my own ethnic group to make a family.

    All to often in this time, we see people mix and match & the kids suffer for it. This doesn't mean they suffer forever but within their entire life there will be pockets of specific hardships due to the parents choice.

    Why fix what isn't broke?
    All ethnic groups come with good & bad, in terms of health this may mean if your ethnic group is likely to develope diabetes or heart disease even in healthy people, & you have kids with a person out of your group , you then add to the list of possibilities for illnesses.
    So why do it...

    As for simply getting married without the idea of kids... most people i have known who settled with a person out of their ethnic group, almost always had some issue. Even little pointless problems would arise & at some point 1 of the 2 sides would use "race" against the other & it only stirs an already "simmering pot" of BS just waiting to boil over. Even if you think there is no biased part of yourself, when "the bear is poked" you will be surpised at who you turn into.

    End point: would i mix, NO... do people do it? Of course they do.

    What is best or right is entirely up to you.

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  • it is the most important thing. I am white. i am only attracted to white women. There has been only 1 black woman I have ever seen that I would have had sex with and that was Vanessa Williams. Otherwise I just am not at all attracted. I don't find Asian women attractive at all so i seriously don't get the whole "yellow fever' thing.

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  • Nope especially since I believe it's only a social label.. & Besides it's too many fione women in the world not to see all of their beauty..

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  • I have a mild preference for black women because I grew up with mostly black women around, but otherwise I don't care.

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    • Are you black yourself?

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    • My last fiance was black. We were supposed to get married this coming year, but the age difference was too large. That was my fault. She was just so gorgeous I let my Dad override my brain (such as it is.)

    • D*** not Dad. Damn you autocorrect! 😂

  • I am Caucasian and I personally don't care too much, my first crushes were Latino and Asian. Though, I do have a harder time connecting with African women, but that's probably because of more cultural differences

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  • Well for me race doesn't matter to me because in my opinion it's not about what the person looks like; it's really about who they truly are in the inside. To be honest I'm a black dude who finds both black & white women so attractive & I've always thought of it that way for a long time. But overall I will date & marry the one person who's totally right for me.

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  • Depends on the individual personally i am not attracted to other races. As much as i'd like to be since it would really improve my dating pool as i clicked really well with girls from other races i need to feel physical attraction for someone i date and i have never felt that for another race (except for a handfull of exceptions).

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  • I am white and prefer white or Asian. I am open to latinas, but probably wouldn't date a black or indian girl.

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  • It depends on the person. I don't want a stereotypical white girl or black girl.
    If I like her I like her.
    But Yeah, I do find white girl more attractive than black Women, so the chance of me dating a white girl is hogher

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  • Race is not a deal-breaker for me. Religious compatibility is. I'm not religious, and would not date religious women.

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  • I’m mixed but mostly associated with African American which is fine.

    Most of my relationships were interracial relationships because I’m not really concerned with the opinions of people who judge a person on the surface than their character.

    Is it important to me? Probably not. I know I look for certain characteristics and traits that I find attractive and makes me feel we will last a long time.

    Don’t let anyone tell you who you should love and never cast judgement before knowing them.

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  • Not important to me however culture is a problem for me especially when it comes to women of my own race. Im Indian and culturally speaking most Indians are hindu and I come from a Christian background therefore for that reason I don't want to date Indian girls since their culture is different from mine.

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  • Race doesn't matter, personality matters and if she is attractive that's all that matters to me, I find that their are attractive women of all races.

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What Girls Said 168

  • 3/4 North Indian (Punjabi) and my partner is 3/4 Caucasian British and 1/4 Welsh.

    Ethnicity does not matter to me. It's just a geographical location, varying of skin tone. It does not matter to me.

    And for those who say race-mixing is bad.
    ---> modern homo sapiens are an out come of mixing.
    ---> mixing means that the child will have a better immune system, and less chance of catching genetic diseases
    ---> there is absolutely nothing wrong with inter-racial relationships, it's actually good to see some people don't care about the colour because every ethnicity is beautiful in it's own way

    :-]

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  • I'm Caucasian. Race isn't really a factor for me.

    I was raised in a predominantly white area - Seriously, the first non-white person to move to my community was my friend's step-dad (he's half white and half black) and he's a delightful man. He moved here when we were 16 or something.

    Anyway, I met my fiance when I was 14, we started dating when I was 18, and I didn't genuinely interact with another racial group until I moved to college. And by then, I was already hung up on my now fiance who is white.

    But if I'd been a normal person and not gotten engaged to her high school sweetheart then race would not be a factor at all in choosing who to date.

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  • Ideally, I want someone from the Mediterrenean since that's where i'm from.

    I'm not too strict on which ethnicity specifically, but as long as the person is ethnically from mediterrenean country or looks like it, it would be my preference ( North African, Levantine, South European or Turkish mainly).

    I'm Tunisian, which means i'm most likely mixed between different Mediterrenean populations, mostly Middle Eastern, Amazigh and Southern European.

    The guy I like is Italian so even if he is not from the same ethnicity , his country is geocraphically very close to mine and his phenotype is very similar to mine, he's actually darker.

    I want this because I would prefer it if my kids look similar to me and I have a preference to Mediterrenean cultures and landscape. Not to mention that men from those regions are the ones i find the most attractive.

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    • It mostly has to do with how similar the man looks like. I like my italian guy because he shares a similar type of phenotype than me. I wouldn't really want to be with an Italian who is too blonde, and I wouldn't want to be with a Blonde Tunisian (unless he still has some mediterrenean look to him).

      For me, the most handsome men are:
      Kinda Tall
      Olive skin tone, not too dark, not too light. Even if he is light, I want him to have a warm undertone.
      Caucasian facial bone structure
      Dark hair that isn't kinky nor extremely straight.

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    • @HonestWhiteGuy I'm not considered white though because I'm not Euorpean

    • @ElissaDido Hmm well when you get the DNA test you will know for sure, we'll see whos right :D I know that in the U. S. they use the term "Non White Hispanic" to refer to White Hispanic people that have Spaniard ancestors.

  • I'm a sapiosexual, so looks don't matter to me. But if I were to factor looks into it, I'm only attracted to very fair skin, not even tanned white skin.
    I dated two black guys in high school.

    Religion is much more important. I'm pagan, but I don't really follow any one path.

    I'm white.

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  • Asian girl checking in - am attracted to all races; have liked Indians, Chinese, blacks and whites in the past. Honestly wtf @ people who only date within their race because of "physical appearance". Looks don't last forever so bye

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  • Human is preferred

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  • No... race is not important. You can't tell your heart what to feel. If Im compatible with Someone, the color of ones skin is not going to really be a deal breaker. I've dated guys of many races, I'm more about who the guy is not what he is. I'm black (with traces of European, Scandinavian, Pacific Islander, and Asian). But for the sake of making it easier, black. My family is multi-racial/cultural. There are far more important things in a relationship that race, in my opinion.

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  • I'm Asian, Brown, Persian, Caucasian,.. whatever you wanna pick...
    I don't have any strong preferences when it comes to race because I've seen attractive guys from so many different races and Ugly ones too... as long as we're compatible and he's good to me and he's good looking too. I don't care what his race is.
    the things which do matter to me are personality in general and religiousness, I'm not religious and I don't think I'll make it with a religious person

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  • No I really don't have a racial preference. Cultural cross overs can actually be really interesting to learn about and as long as both partners were willing to learn about each other's cultures that would be fine. Plus, living in a western society means that we all have similar cultures anyway

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  • I am mixed raced, Puerto Rican and Jamaican. My racial background is Taino Indian, white, black, Indian, and some Asian. I mostly just say white, black and Native Indian. I have no racial preference in dating because that's stupid. I don't look at people and see races, I see human beings. Anyone who is incapable of that has a problem.

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    • Jamaican is not a race, it's black people over here from Africa like all other blacks, some Jcans are white but only like 2% of the population and mostly black, few Asians and hardly any other ethnicity, some of us mixed with Irish, I probably am because my family has green eyes curly hair, I have reddish brown highlights and brown hair and I'm a drunk, but we're black mostly over here.

    • @azzntittiz You don't think I know that? Did you completely read over the part where I explained what my racial background entails?

  • You don't decide who you fall in love with do you. The heart wants what it wants. To be really honest, I never imagine myself married to somebody who's black. But I don't know what the future has to hold. I don't know who's good for me. I'm Kurdish by the way.

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  • not important at all.
    (my boyfriend is east Asian. I'm white.)

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  • I'm black and I've attracted and been attracted to men of all races. As long as he's moderately attractive, intelligent, and kind, race isn't a major factor to me.

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  • I won't date outside my race. It is a preference I have.

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  • It didn't use to be important, until I realized that I have a serious issue...
    I don't want to get married, but if I wanted to, I would rather get married to someone of my race. It would be easier and I wouldn't have this issue anymore.

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  • Race really doesn't matter to me.. I do have preferences but I'd still marry someone that isn't part of my preferences if I fall in love with him. It is all about personality.

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  • when you date someone you date the person not a race.

    I'm white, my man is Asian.

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  • I love Latinos.
    My preference and weak spot is Mexican men I love the brown hair, brown eyes, and brown skin. I love the culture. I love how they flirt. Tbh, I like them a little machista 🤷🏼‍♀️😅
    💯👌🏻😍

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  • Not really important to me because looks, personality, intelligence, communication, etc peak my interest more than any particular race since I believe we individuals are all different and i'll have different chemistry with each one but what's most important to me is he be Christian because I put belief above romance when marrying someone. I'm Asian but I don't believe or prefer marrying someone from same ethnicity because I hate worrying about the last name taboo lol, and I believe mix babies are awesome, getting the best of both worlds lol and they are too adorable, kinda like seeing what will happen if you breed 2 types of dogs and seeing the outcome of the breed and genes, that makes it more unique than a uniform lol or mixing flowers to get a hybrid aha

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  • Mmh me and my boyfriend are both Caucasian, but I am Italian and he is Romanian:)
    For me is important that we are both white Caucasian

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  • I know personally I would try to avoid dating a certain race but otherwise I don't mind it at all. I'm Timorese (Asian) but also have African blood in me

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  • I'm a white woman, and I don't care about the race of my partner. Just their personality. I've dated men from 4 different continents.

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  • It doesn’t matter to me. I’ve dated both black and white guys before, so I’ve got my taste of some vanilla and chocolate. Things always taste better when you mix altogether lol 😂

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  • Doesn't matter

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  • Not that important at all. Although if his parents were strict and wanted him to only date within his own race, I’d take it pretty hard. I don’t want to get into a situation where I’m hated for no reason by the potential in-laws.

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  • I married someone from another race. Race means not a thing to me either way.

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  • I find Latin people attractive, physically not so much Asian or African people but I love Spanish looking guys with tanned skin and black hair 👀👌🏼

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    • Damn. Since you played the "Not so much Indian" card.. :-(

    • @Willyboy54 well I was kind of saying that generally I'm not attracted. However I have seen Indian men I think are cute, for example Pi from the movie, life of Pi! Same goes for some black men, I've been attracted to a few. But generally speaking I'm usually drawn to white men more than anything.

  • I wouldn't dismiss the possibility of love and compatibility based on someones skin color.

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  • I am White (mostly English and Irish, with some Italian and German). I only date White men, and would only marry a White man. Preferably Northern European (I like blonde hair/blue eyes).

    That's just what I'm attracted to. I feel like most people are attracted to their race. It's what's familiar.

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  • your race shouldn't even be a factor love is love, at the end of the day its all about who you feel most comfortable around who respects you and who love you for who you are regardless of the color of your skin and if you talk to any "interracial couple" as society call it they would all tell you the same thing. its great to experience different cultures it opens up your mind to so many amazing things and takes you out of that race box that so many people live in out of fear of what others may say or think, when that doesn't even matter.

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