What would you do if you loved someone so much but were not happy in the relationship?

What if you love someone so much that you can't hurt him/her but at the same time you are not happy with relationship or being together.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • When you're devoted to someone, you would do anything you could to fix the problem no matter how minor or severe. Usually, the majority of arguments and disagreements that happen in relationships are due to immature behavior, being closed-minded on a one-sided opinion or having trust broken from cheating, addiction problems and/or becoming physically/emotionally abusive.

    I would be direct and tell my significant other about the problems I'm having with her along with hearing her own problems with me as well. Then we would have a conversation and come up with a compromise/solution so we can get back on track! If the damage in the relationship is beyond repair to where even communication doesn't work, I would break it off but still be her friend if she wanted to. No one deserves to have toxicity in their relationship and the sooner the problems are addressed and solved, the better it'll be!

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Most Helpful Girl

  • If it isn’t working for you, maybe you need to sit back and evaluate what it is you love about him, and what has changed in your life for you to realize that it's making you happy anymore. Maybe you’ve changed and he hasn’t, it's one of those things that may need a bit of time out, or a good heart to heart, to find out what you both expect out of your relationship.
    If there are still good things about it, you both may need to work out what these are and what's not working for you; are they major deal breakers or are they things that are changeable? Find out in yourself why you're unhappy in the relationship. If, to be happier, you need to end your current relationship, then do so, for his sake as well as yours.

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What Guys Said 100

  • I would try to fix the problem and tell my girlfriend that I am not happy and we have to change things.
    If you love someone so much, then it's possible for you to be happy with that person once both of you know what the problem was.
    If you're so unhappy that you start to love your partner less, I would break up as it would definitely turn into a toxic relationship.

    Some people throw away relationships way to fast without even trying to fix something, while others stay in toxic or unhappy relationships for too long because they are afraid nobody is ever going to love them again. You have to decide on your own if you want to stay in the realtionship or not. It really depends on why you are unhappy:

    - If you are unhappy because the relationship is getting boring or you're not going out that much anymore or something like that, I think you should definitely try to work things out and tell your partner what you don't like

    - If you are unhappy because you're partner is abusive, break up !! no matter how happy you were once, under these circumstances it's not worth it to fix things.

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  • First thing you gotta do is figure out why. Sometimes these are phased. I think it happens cause we're simply bored which is kind of unfair to both parties. If that's not the case, and the relationship is lacking something, let them know so they can either try working on it or at least see it coming.

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  • If u love u should be happy. But if u think just cuz u love everything will always be good and straight line, then you are. not ready for it.

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  • What? No...

    Love too much to hurt someone? No. My love is supposed to teach you, to show you what you can do, and what you do wrong.

    My love is there so you can do something with it. And if you don't, then it goes somewhere else!

    That sounds right!

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  • Might depend what you're not happy about- is it something that can be fixed, e. g., would therapy help? Have you exhausted all possibilities for fixing things?

    If I am that unhappy, I'd end the relationship unless we had kids together, in which case I'd stay in it until I am sure there is no other solution than ending it.

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  • This may sound cliche, but if your not happy and you stay in a relationship for whatever reason even if it's to spare your partners feelings... then your relationship isn't firm on a foundation of honesty, you're living a lie pretending to be content and staying when you're not being true to your own feelings and honest with yourself. I've always heard, seen and have personally experienced that honesty and trust are truly the foundation that hold the rest of tbe union firmly planted with one another on a place of love and respect for your partner. You're not doing them or yourself any justice by living in a relationship that you truly end up unhappy and miserable. It just builds more resentment and pushes the 2 further apart sometimes to the point of thiings getting ugly when you finally do decide to leave, you'll think..."hmm, should of split ways when I first began to feel unhappy and it usually ends up worse you are so unhappy, probably would've been a more peaceful resution back then than the way its now with this incredible feeling of stressful anger & burning despise we now have for each other making it less likely that we can ever be civil with each other in the future." Just my opinion, but it comes from experience✌

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  • well first off you love them so you've already got that going for you. being happy/unhappy can be fixed, just find the problem and address it with your partner. you can't honestly say you are unhappy but dont know why.

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  • There's an old song called "Love is stronger than pride". I know how you feel. I did it once, I don't think I could survive going through a relationship like that again. It was so draining trying to get her to love me as much as I loved her. True love means loving yourself first. Remember your love and your heart is only worthy of getting the same in return.

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  • I tried to figure out what could make me unhappy in such a situation. If a strong bond (love, if you want to call it like this) is there, I cannot imagine that insufficient happiness is generated. This would say to me that in case of unhappiness (lasting and prevalent) the 'love' would be deteriorated. I would then first try to find a way for -emm- repairs.

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  • There are bad and good times in relationship. It's just your expectations frOm the person you love.. You sometimes expect more. Sometimes that pwrson is going through a bad phase. So, one should just continue love that person and be with him and talk to him if he has something going on and how to make things work !

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  • That is impossible, If you are living with someone you love a lot, you can't be unhappy with them, Unless they dont love you the same as you do, or they abuse you in some way, in which case you should learnt to respect yourself and distance yourself from them

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  • You can still love someone and not be in an exclusive relationship. You might go through a spurt, and maybe come back to together someday or maybe not.

    There is such thing as the gift of missing you.

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  • Your question has the only answer the answer is to make new relation with your partner as a friend you both have to follow friendly behaviour with each other then tell what happens

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  • Communicate as much as I can about how I feel (What is wrong to me, what I want to change etc) - if that still doesn't work, well then the relationship won't work, so it's time to move on.

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  • You've got to do what's right for you (both of you ultimately). Love alone isn't always enough if you're not happy or the relationship isn't a good one.

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  • Many people should not be in any relationship, they are better off being single and working on overcoming their interpersonal issues and what is causing them to seek, happiness, by way of investing in the idea a cure of their unhappiness can be found in another person to make them happy. That is impossible. It is tragic because so many girls are doing just that. They are unhappy and it feels good to them, to have a boy who likes them, but that isn’t going to make them happy. If you really love someone, you have to realize and be able to identify when this is the case, you can’t simply make someone else happy, when happiness is about being proud of oneself, believing in oneself, being interested in things, being confident enough to take risks, etc... if you love someone, you invest in influencing your SO to believe in themselves

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  • Very difficult question
    Don't know how to answer, but I think k it is crucial to try to understand each other and find out the reasons for unhappiness and try to solve
    It is not easy but can be achievable

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  • It is not possible if you love someone then you should be happy because there is nothing precious like love relationship. I know some misunderstanding will be there but you both give some time to each other and sort out it.

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  • If you're truly unhappy it's only gonna get worse & if you really don't wanna hurt him you shouldn't lead him any further down this path. First talk to him about it if you haven't already & if that doesn't work u should probably end it. If you two love eachother as much as it sounds like you should both want eachother to be happy weather you're together or not. The path you're on now leads to hurt for both of you. Talk to him. If it can't ve fixed then at least you can end things without hating eachother. You'll probably even remain lige long friends that way. If you put it off eventually you'll resent

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  • Talk about the things that make you unhappy in the relationship and see whether they can (and whether there is willingness for them to) be sorted out.

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What Girls Said 43

  • Talk about the issues, if they weren't willing to make any effort to change these things or compromise eventually i'd leave.

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  • Break up. Happiness is important to me.

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  • Then you'll have to break up because it's better to hurt him/her now than lead them on and hurt them later. It's better to move on now than having to move on later when the feelings become even stronger. That of course is the worse option you have.
    A better option is to sit with your partner, discuss what makes you unhappy in the relationship and find out solutions as to how to improve yourselves in order to make the relationship better and long lasting.

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  • I think you are hurting them more by staying and leading them to believe you are happy and it not the case. Communicating is the only way dear. Maybe if he knew what was making you unhappy things may change but you won't know til you voice. If you love them that much you will give them that at least I should think.

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  • You have to think very carefully about why you aren't happy and if there is anything you can do to change that.

    In my own experience, as I've been in your shoes, I'd your partner loves you then you'll be surprised how hard they are willing to work to make you happy. To make the relationship work. My partner has amazed me. He's so much stronger and loves me so much more than I thought possible.

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  • If you're not happy I don't see why you would stay, if the person cared about you they would in fact let you go. Another thing is maybe you don't love them, loving a person makes you happy, and if they're doing something so wrong shouldn't it fade what feeling you have for them already?

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  • It depends on why u r not happy... if it is because of your past then don't think about it if it is because you miss someone then try to see that person if it is because u got stress try to relax if it isbecause you have a crush on someone else then you got a problem including if u think about cheating or he is cheating... either way it goes... you need to figure out which person u be with

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  • If both of you are fine without a relationship you can just beu friends. I love my friends and not for that reason i want to be with them. And if you feel like you want more than a friendship, well you can be fuck fiends

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  • Communicate how you're feeling see if you can work it out, make compromises on both ends, do everything you can. If you are still not happy it is time to part ways.

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  • Can you imagine how hurt they would be if they knew you lied to them about being happy with them. You need to speak to ur partner and see if you can't be happy again some how or pull the plug

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  • When I felt that, I left. I figured the broken heart would be temporary, but staying together would mean I'd be unhappy for years.

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  • Honestly just leave. I was with my ex 3 1/2 years and was in love that turned into have love for because I wasn't happy. I also realize I can't be in love if i'm not happy

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  • See I know it's wrong but your happiness comes first no matter what, and from my guessing I'm going to assume that you've reached a point that you feel platonic in it and I think you should leave

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  • I'd break up with them eventually. There's only so much effort you can put into something. Love doesn't make the relationship machine run, work does.

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  • Honestly, if you really love someone you will fight to make it work. Unless either of you is cheating, lying, abusing the other.

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  • you can love someone but they might not be good for you

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  • Figure out why we're both unhappy and actively work on it together. I don't like relearning someone. I'd much rather work on myself and my partner work on himself instead of calling it quits. People stay married for a lifetime because they understand that sometimes the love or the passion will die out and they understand that people will fuck up and make mistakes. Really all you have to do is rekindle that spark you once had in the beginning of the relationship by doing things together that you've never done. Only thing is, if someone refuses to grow or put in an effort and are happy with a relationship like that but the other person wants more, I think it best to just end the relationship.

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  • You have to break up. There are plenty of fish in the sea, you only have to put in an effort to make yourself available to meet them

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  • Find out specifically what makes you unhappy and change it.

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