Is there any way I can save our relationship?

I'm a guy in my 20s and I've had a foreign girlfriend for 1 and half years. Our relationship started online, she lived half-way across the world and we visited each other sometimes. About 5 months ago, she moved to my country and moved in with me. She fell in love with me first, before I did, but this is my first serious relationship and I've never been in love before.

The worst part is that I have a gaming addiction I am battling. Because of this, I've neglected her emotionally. I've hated this addiction for a while and have been trying to quit. I've finally started to change so I can be with her and treat her like she deserves to be treated. It took me a while, but I realized she's the most important thing for me and that I love her. But very soon after I started changing, she admitted that she is planning on moving out in a month and going to live with her friends and that she is fed up with how I've treated her. She says she doesn't love me anymore. I hate myself for how I've treated her. I know I deserve this pain and asking for more is selfish.

She said nothing is stopping me from trying to get her back, but she doesn't think it's going to work. This gave me hope because she is at least open to my attempts to win her back and to change, but every time I ask her to do something with me or try to show some kindness, she rejects it. She prefers chatting with friends or relaxing after work.

She used to say some of the happiest moments in her life were with me, such as when she visited me for the first time in my country, so I still have a bit of hope that she might still have some feelings for me that I can reignite. So I've decided that I am going to be the best version of myself for the remaining month before she moves out and if she is still determined to break up, I will let her go to find her own happiness.

Is there anything I can try to at least get her to do things with me, so we have a chance to interact and to fall in love again? Any advice?

Is there any way I can save our relationship?

Updates:
Thanks for the advice guys. So far I've heard 2 main conflicting points. One saying I shouldn't push her and should do this gradually. Another saying I should be insistent she goes out with me and that I'll take her back home if she doesn't like it.

I forgot to mention that she works 6 days of the week at the moment. She has virtually no time to go out because she prefers to rest at home after work and when she has time (weekends), she prefers to hang out with her friends.
I've attempted to be good to her, but she is really making an effort to interact with me as little as possible now. We had a short conversation and she says she feels forced to interact with me and talk to me, even though she doesn't love me anymore, so she wants to move out faster. She's aiming to move out at the end of this month or start of next month, meaning that I have 2 weeks or less. Even less time than I thought. I think it's finished and there's nothing I can do to get her back :(

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Most Helpful Girl

  • She loved you even when you guys weren’t close, got close, then you neglected her. Women will hold on until we can’t any longer. And you probably made her feel as if she was 2nd priority. It’s no good feeling but when we are done , we are done! That doesn’t mean you can’t try to save your relationship. You guys need to start fresh. Let her move out , it could strengthen the bond you both have with one another. And friends only help but for so long. Be patient and give her the space she needs

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Most Helpful Guy

  • She moved half way across the world for you. So that tells you everything you need to know about how much she loves you. The thing with women is they don't believe the changes you are making are permanent. She is emotionally hurt and she's probably reached her breaking point. Your best chance is to do as you said. Become the best version of yourself possible. Sell your video game systems to show her that you are serious. Think of it as a marathon, not a sprint. Hopefully over time she will realize that the changes you are making are permanent. You have to keep yourself emotionally grounded in the meantime and not do anything that could further damage your chances. Don't blame her, don't smother her. Don't beg her. You are feeling desperate and it's hard not to do these things. But it is imperative that you don't. It will only push her further away. Best of luck to you man!

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    • I agreed with this

    • Show All
    • Thanks a lot.

    • Yeah his ideas are not bad, you could try that and just focus on your job. Also sell all your games would be good too, so when she see that you don't have any games in the house anymore than she will know that you are serious about this matter. Giving her space would be great at this moment too, it will allow her some times to miss you like what he had said.

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What Girls Said 4

  • The only thing you can do is show her that you have changed. You have to gain back her trust. The fact that she left means that it has already gone to far for her. You can't start again, not even for a little while.
    I sincerely hope you to get back together. Good luck!

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  • Honestly, it sounds like it's over... but if you really insist on trying, you gotta go at it hard. If she brushes you off, insist she just gives you a chance to show her what you're capable of, and even if she doesn't enjoy the activity you'll take her right home. You have to keep trying. If it doesn't work, accept your mistakes and learn.

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  • Don't really know if it would help but if I was In your situation, I would have taken my boyfriend on a vacation with me & proved myself. Also, it wouldn't be easy to convince them to go on a vacation, but I'd suggest, plan & book everything & give her a surprise, maybe you'll have to plead a lot to her but I think she would agree & even be happy *fingers crossed* 😝 & yes, don't even think of doing this if by any chance she hates traveling.

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  • Try to take her to a place she likes. Maybe buy something for her or take her out for dinner.

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What Guys Said 6

  • One simple act can change a person's view on life. You need to find a way to show you care for her in one simple act.
    I showed it by showing the passion I poured into the improvising guitar playing I dedicated to a girl and she knew I meant it. Passion can be shown in many forms. You need to find your form of passion to show her.

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    • That's okay. If you have to force something it will usually break. No point in trying to hold on when something better may come along the way. The greater the patience, the greater the reward. Do not bring yesterday's horrors into this dayb for the horrors may blind you from the enlightenment today has to show for you.

  • Show random acts of kindness. When she gets home from work, have dinner prepared, or a nice relaxing bubble bath waiting for her. She may question why you're doing this, but stick to your guns, and be nonchalant about it. (Also don't forget to ask about her day or if there is anything you can do for her, to make life easier for her).

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    • She obviously loves you, and you just gotta relax, and take things step by step.

  • Tell her you love her many times a day everyday. But sincere about it. Make her feel it. Thats all I can say. Change bruh

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  • Dude the best way to fix this is to find the perfect way to express your love for her.

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  • Use your instincts , be charming and be the kind hearted man sge knows you are

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  • Nope

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