How should I react when my girlfriend says she feels fat?

Sometimes she says "I'm fat" or "I've always been the fat kid". I don't think she is. Sure, she has some extra pounds, but I think "fat" might be pushing it. She wants to work on losing some weight and getting fit and I support her in this. I've told her that I think she's beautiful either way (and she is). I've asked her what I can do or say and she just said I should motivate her to work out and keep her accountable. But what do I say if she says "I'm fat"?

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Most Helpful Girls

  • Keep your mouth shut.

    ... I'm not kidding; just don't agree or disagree becauae no matter what you say, she's not going to be happy, lol.

    Just support her, exercise with her, and encourage her. As she loses weight, cheer her on.

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    • Lol that’s terrible advice because they never lose the weight. Or satisfied when they do

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    • Haha, how naive of you.
      I am single and have been for years. I lost weight because I want to be healthy, not popping pills, and feel better about myself.

      NOT to impress a partner. So I'm doing this because I love being fit and think I CAN look better.

      So the only person that I'm working to satisfy and please is myself. And right I know I can look better; so I'm going to keep pushing myself until I'm happy.

      But thanks for your input nonetheless~

    • I don't know it just what I’ve observed from girls, when the standard of beauty was to be slim with big Brest, breast implants were the things to get. Nowadays is all about being curvy and having a big ass. Now girls are getting butt injections. I don’t think it’s naïve to say that women gather there self esteem from others. I don’t know why. But it’s seem to be why girls are complaining that all the women in the magazine set an impossible beauty standard, but when was the last time you heard a guy say that Chris hemsworth has set an impossible standards for men too meet? Never because men don’t derive there self worth from looks. I don't know it’s just what I’ve observed:/

  • As insecure as it is, if I’m having a bad self image day I just want my boyfriend to reassure me that he still thinks I’m attractive. Just tell her she’s beautiful to you at any weight.

    In the meantime around those moments, try and encourage her subtly to improve her fitness and diet. Say, “hey it’s a nice day let’s go for a walk down at the beach” or find fun date activities that involve exercise. One of my personal favourites is a place called Bounce which is a trampolining place! Rock climbing/hiking/horse riding is fun too! And try find new healthy recipes to cook together!

    Anyway I digressed, but my point is just continue to show your support and things will be fine!

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Most Helpful Guys

  • Tell her that feeling insecure burns zero calories.

    A single push-up burns 25 calories.

    Then point down at the ground in case she doesn't get the hint. You know how thick they can be when it's convenient for them.

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  • ITS A TRAP!!! Do not do anything to motivate her. But you can cheer her on. You can help her by having a workout plan together. But pushing on her with the goal to lose weight is a risky thing to do. Pushing on her to reach her goals is ok... up to a point. Also realize those goals are hard and even if you care and push. Her not wanting to work out or eat right today and you reminding her will be a double curse... because you will be pushing on her to do something she wants to have but doesn't want to do the work and your pushing will remind her that she is 'fat' and that she is failing at it just by resisting your encouragement. So she will even resent pushing you away for doing what she told you she wanted.

    There is a great saying "I wasted all my 'skinny years' thinking I was fat."

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Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 10

  • Tell her that if she doesn't like herself the way she is that she's free to change something about it since crying alone will not help her. You can still tell her that you like her the way she is but this probably wouldn't change the way she sees herself.

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    • So basically something along "if you think so then do sth about it".

  • Comfort her and make her feel better about herself. Tell her she is beautiful whenever she says fat. Ask if she wants help changing since she is so distressed. And motivate her to love herself at any size

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  • If she says she fat, tell her that her saying that is counterproductive in her journey to get healthy. Tell her that she's only going to bring herself down and discourage herself with nasty put-downs and you want her to work on being more positive.

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  • Tell her that she is beautiful the way she is and that if she wants to work out you guys can do it together.

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  • She wants u to tell her she’s beautiful. she's fishing for compliments.

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  • Tell her you love her and that's it. You don't wanna start a fight, she is insecure. Take care

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  • Tell her you could go jogging together or swimming

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  • Pay for her gym

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  • Tell her she is not fat, but just a bit chubby.

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  • Always always always say the opposite!!

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What Guys Said 9

  • I'd say that I don't think so, but if she does then she needs to do something about it.

    Otherwise she should just keep her fat mouth closed and stop complaining about it. Lol

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  • you can't win. if you say "you are not fat" she'll feel fat anyway and if you say "well then work out to lose some", you'll be hit by all her anger. just don't say anything.

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  • Here's what i'd do partner, if we were having this conversation at home I would just shag her , nothing says "you're gorgeous and i love you" like that , if not at home... I'd try to get home as soon as possible and shag her

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  • Just nod. And of course you have to be smart to counter her anger. If she gets mad, just say something like "but what do you want me to say?" Be chill.

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  • say you'll go to the gym together. That should make her feel happy

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  • "Less than yesterday and more than tomorrow"

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  • Tell her to go for a run.

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  • Just agree with her

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  • Make fat jokes at her expense

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