I have been married for 13 years to a great guy, but I really want to be with women. Would the average guy be ok with me having a girl on the side?
What Girls & Guys Said221
It's definitely a discussion you need to have with your husband. If he's not okay with it, then you need to decide if you need to divorce or if you're okay staying where you are. I would say the average guy wouldn't be okay with it.
I would definitely feel jealous of their connection.
I would also want to have sex with both of them and feel left out.
Then I'd realize, marriage is really hard and why do I have to deal with all the problems related to being married, but other people get to sleep with her for free.
It just seems like a shit deal.
I would rather she had a woman instead of another guy, but I would be upset about it. The concept of marriage runs deeper than sharing a home and responsibility of finances. It also carries intimacy and love and respect along with communication and trust.
If you were my wife and you told me that, I would feel betrayed and my trust destroyed. If we spent 13 years in what I believed was a great marriage for you to suddenly say "I want to be with a woman." It would be a hard slap to the face. I would be wondering why the hell I wasted 13 years of my time, my money and my world with this woman who I thought loved me.
An open relationship is not a marriage. That is more swinger territory than anything. If you want this, you better tell him and if he is cool with it, then maybe you should be cool with him having a side girl as well. Would you be cool with him having that privilege to sleep with another woman while you do the same, or does that bother you? This could just as easily be a passing desire. You want to risk a marriage because of that?
I'll be honest. It would depend if she just wanted some fun and pleasure of girl girl sex or actually wanted a romantic relationship with a woman. Just sex I can be ok with, but I would not like it if she wanted a side relationship with her on a romantic level. I love lesbians. It's the main reason I masturbate and watch porn. I have lots of fantasies about them including threesomes. At the same time, I am slightly bi-curious too, so I can understand the desires of wanting to try it. So because it fuels my fantasy and is in my kinky wheelhouse I would be ok with her wanting this. She would still have to love me at the end of the day and still make me #1 in her life.
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Let me ask you this then are you ok with your husband having other women as well. If yes then you really don't have a marriage what you have is two people who share responsibility for a house but have their own lives if not then what your asking for is for him to take all of the responsibility for whatever you want to call it but have none of the benefits.
Secondly and this is an important point you're lying to him and yourself and he'd be right to be pissed off with you as he's built his life around you while he isn't what you want.
Have you also thought that if you both can have other women then what are you going to do when he walks in and tells you to leave or he packs his bags and walks out saying he's found something better. Are you ready for that.
Frankly your in a mess, I don't wish you well you'll reap what you've sowed.
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Aslong as you are open about it, and dont spend more time with her than with him, yeah i think its okay
In First place I wouldn't enter marriage. If my Partner decided for herself to have a "Girl in the Side" then I would do the Same.
I am married and my answer would be no. A threesome with an anonymous person though I might consider.
Only a very few men would be ok if you shared the girl on the side.
Some men in my country might; but for me it would be an instant dealbreaker.
Only if you're hot.
He's more than likely going to be upset.
I would be open to discuss but probably not.
It depends upon the person..
Uhh, nope! You women suck these days.
Would you be ok if your husband wanted to be with a man on the side?
I wouldn't , i think you need a divorce
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