I'm gonna use a metaphor. A relationship between two people is like a glass pane. Some glasses are tempered and made to endure more. Others are really thin and can only take 1 hit before they shatter. You "add" to it with time and values that strengthen a relationship.Now if a person does something minor it is like a stain on the glass. You can take a cloth and clean it (you give a second chance).Other things might cause a small rupture that is outside of your eyesight. You can see it if you look for it, but it's not constantly in your view. (Again you give a second chance)Now those ruptures of course can add up and make a bigger line in your glass. Sometimes you can overlook it, others you can't. (There is always a sting that reminds you of the bad event. Here it is completely up to the person if and for how long he/she can or chooses to ignore it) sometimes we choose to mend it and try to hold a relationship, although it will never be the same again. In some cases something can happen and the glass will shatter. In those cases there is no second chance. If the glass pane shatters into pieces to the floor you can't fix it. That's it. No second chances there.Now how much of an impact an event will have on your side of the glass is something that you alone can determine...
This analogy is really on spot, I love it.
Thank you for MHO! 😃
I would never give a second chance for those issues that I am very adamant about. Those includeDrugs of any kind and addictions, including but not limited to:Smoking, alcohol, gambling, sex, cheating, violence, crimes of any kind, including petty theft and perversions. Those are the ones that come to my mind as of now.Those type of addictions are very hard to get over with and the slightest incentive or lack of will of power will most likely lead to a relapse.I would be more lenient on those minor issues and circumstances that led to a one time occurrence. I believe those situations which I don't consider a major red flag can be talked about with the offender and a common solution found.I am not likely to grant a third chance because if I let that one pass, then I am not truthful to my precept and I might as well not have any self-esteem and pride and accept every nonsense and negative actions.
Thank you for the MHO.It seems that I am getting a number of them from you and I will refrain to write novels in the future so that others get their turns too.Have a wonderful upcoming week-end and don't forget your bathing suit.Somehow, I envy you ;-)
I give you MHOs because you write really deep and thought provoking answers, and I really enjoy reading them :)!Thank you, I admit I'm looking forward to it.Although I admit I'll probably stay clothed and under an umbrella - I have very pale skin and get burnt easily.They'll enjoy more the sun and water, I'll just relax and drink something fresh.
Just don't forget your SPF50, a hat but most of all, don't forget these dark sunglasses that will allow you to look around on the beach for... somebody you may know or pike your interest while, hmmm, ... other people are swimming ;-)Bon voyage and return safe and sound.I want to read more from you ;-)
If we broke up for some reason unrelated to the quality of our relationship, yes. E. g., if we broke up because she moved to a distant location, and later she moved back to my area, yes. If we broke up because one of us was dissatisfied with the relationship, probably not. Reconcile and you usually rediscover the reason for the original break up.
Thanks for MHO!
Yeah, everyone deserves a second chance, but I'm not gonna be stupid about it and act like nothing happened. An exception is cheating, you get one chance to be loyal, if you break that rule then it's over no matter what for me.
Have an opinion?
It would absolutely depend on the circumstances.
In a relationship sense, it depends.No relationship is perfect and there will be mess ups from time to time, but depending on the severity of the mess up, there are certain things I can't forgive. Cheating and abuse are two things that'll make me leave for good. Making a smaller mistake/saying something hurtful, that's something I can give a second chance to.
If we are talking about cheating, no. Anything else depends on circumstances, but most likely not because I'm never the one who leaves. If they left me then I generally do not give another chance because I refuse to be a doormat. I get devoted too easily and it takes me forever to heal.
It depends on what the wrong was. Like, if a guy wronged me by hanging out with the girl I despise the most but were friends before I came along... I could give a second chance. But if he met my worst enemy after I met him and she seems to be more important to him than me... then there is no second chance especially if they're talking mad shit about me.
I try my best to assess the probability of whatever undesirable event occurring again and base my decision on that estimated probability multiplied by the undesirability of the event. A higher value would further incline me towards "no".
The rationale they give me also weighs into that estimate. For example, if they blame their misbehavior on a chronic condition or habit that they're not aggressively seeking to treat/improve upon, then the chances seem pretty high that the undesirable event will occur again.
Nope. I don't believe in second chances. It sets a precedent that your word is up for debate and it never firm. While sometimes a second chance is warranted, if you give one by default, people will quickly learn that you don't have much backbone and will walk all over you.
Yes and that is because of my beliefs ! I believe in giving second and more chances ! However , once a date gets married then I no longer have anything to do with him for they have their spouse now ! Thanks
If a guy has cheated then no. I can never feel comfortable with him. Please answer mine?Guys, Does the second face have "much better" proportions? Which is better looking? ↗
“Then Peter came up and said to him, ‘Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?’ Jesus said to him, ‘I do not say to you seven times, but seventy times seven.’” Mat 18:21-22
It depends on what it is and if they were repentant and contrite. If you mean unfaithfulness than no. That is a 100% permanent relationship ender.
I usually give up after the 20th chance. I have a very forgiving soul and big heart. I try to believe everyone is never beyond saving or help. 🥰♥️
Not to a boyfriend or someone I dated. That ship sailed and is moving onward. But second chances are based upon circumstances and situations.
Not normally. I see no reason to revisit relationships that were not working for me. The only one I would consider restarting, if she comes back, is the girl who moved to Connecticut for school. That is the only reason it ended with her.
Depends on why things failed. If the issue/issues have been resolved then maybe. If they haven't been addressed then there's no point
The underlying problems that caused the breakup would have to have been resolved or appear to be resolvable for me to go for a second chance.
In general, yes, depending on the failure. If my wife cheated on me the answer would probably be no, as I have enough friends who have had this happen to them, and forgiveness wasn't enough of a 'bandage" to heal the wound.
i can only ever think of giving the second chance under one condition: she must confess it and deliver some good arguments why i houldn't ditch her. if i find out, we're done. no chance.
Rarely.how can I put this.It not about "forgiven" as it is something that never crosses my mind. I pretty neutral towards all and most. I also find most people who say "i forgive" you is very hollow at best. And is not needed to move forward as life will keep going rather it done or not. Those who ty seem to stay bitter during those "second" chances.I just have a strong need to dissociate from some one who has upset me or hurt me.Now if it basic shit, like if it something you asked a friend to stop dong and they go and do it again... and again. that was thier MANY second chances and im out the door.But stealing cheating or any of things that sort. No there is no need for a second chance as I will never view the person character the same.
Second chance for what exactly?Some things can be forgiven, some things are unforgivable. Everybody gets to decide.
I would give second chance only if this person love of my life and I will regret I didn't give him chance later or when I'm old. And he must be sorry and understand what wrong he's done.
Ot would depend on the circumstances, but generally no.
Never. 1 chance, and I'm hoping for you too blow it.
More than likely yes but it depends on the situation. If she did something that's really messed up, then no.
In some cases yes but when it comes to cheating there is no second chance
Everybody deserves a second chance, but not for the same mistake
I think I might, give my own girl a second chance, but I decided to give her 5 strikes per semester.
Always a second chance. People learn
I usually do!
Yes I do
On the top of my head no. But never say never
Yes. People can learn from their mistakes.
Everyone deserves a second chance.
Yes I would
one chance u fuck it up fuck off
We should give second chances because God has given us second chances in life to change.
I am usually always open to giving a second chance as long as the person has not cheated or been abusive towards me.
I believe people deserve second chances, but yes it really does depend on the circumstances
NoNever forgetNever forgiveA call for revengeFace judgement
Not for cheaters of physical abusive people. For other issues maybe
Never for a cheater
If it is someone toxic, absolutely not. Too many women in my life have thought they could take their PMS out on me. There are no second chances for lacking self control
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