Is it me or is it him?

My boyfriend has a best friend who is a girl. I can't stand it when she comes over and I have to be uncomfortable at home, and she's around every day; always bringing him food or helping him out with money.
My boyfriend knows how I feel about her but he tells me to grow up & stop being jealous, that they are just friends and I do honestly know they are just friends. I feel bad because this girl thinks I hate her & she's reached out to me a couple times trying to get me to hang out & be comfortable but I told her my problem has nothing to do with her but with how my boyfriend talks & gives so much more respect to her then me. He never understands my feelings about this, he justify's himself on being right on the ways he can be so mean and for no reason... he blames what I've done to hurt him in my past is why his friend gets more respect then me and until I stop being a 'slut' which to him means I entertaining other guys messages (because I have lately) but everyday I put up with his friend being around which makes me feel some type of way and I'm continuously called a slut or whore 10x a day - even when I'm playing a game on my phone but he thinks I'm texting with guys.. things like that make it so hard to feel comfortable around him.
So what should I do?
Is it me or is it him?
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